


I may not lead, I may not follow.

by louder_than_ever



Category: The 1975 (Band)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Drinking & Talking, F/M, Other, Public Blow Jobs, Recreational Drug Use, Romance, Sneaking Around, Unrequited Love, keeping feelings under wraps, messy feelings messing with age-old friendships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:48:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 42,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28132689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louder_than_ever/pseuds/louder_than_ever
Summary: ‘Ok, so, this… is awkward,’ Sophie mumbled. Her cheeks were definitely flushing. ‘Ok. What was the name of your band, I think I missed that..?’She looked at Gus, then at George, who just said, ‘Don’t worry about that.’‘No, honestly. I feel like I’m missing out on something here,’ she insisted.‘You remember that song, from earlier?’ Gus said and looked at her, ‘the one on the radio when we left the motorway? That was them.’She nodded. She could vaguely remember the melody. ‘The… uh. That song about petticoats?’At that point, Ross was laughing out loud. ‘That’s one way of putting it.’
Relationships: Matthew Healy/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I just went with my plot bunny and that's about it. 
> 
> Title has been shameless inspired by Albert Camus. 
> 
> "Don’t walk in front of me - I may not follow.  
> Don’t walk behind me - I may not lead.  
> Walk beside me - just be my friend.” 
> 
> This starts very roughly in late 2013 and obviously, a lot of bits from reality had to be altered.  
> I haven't written fanfiction in about ten years but in 2020, we've seen just about everything happen!  
> If you enjoy, feel free to leave some feedback :)

“I’m tired, Gus!“ she exclaimed. “I can’t believe we didn’t take my car. Yours was bound to break down!” 

Sophie was standing bent over the open bonnet of the Ford, while rain kept pouring down on her. Gus turned the key in the ignition and the car sprung to life. He put his foot down on the peddle, letting the motor roar. For a second, both of them were sure the problem had vanished. But just then the bucking started again. The car kept stuttering for another five seconds before Gus switched it off and climbed out to stand beside her

The rain had soaked her moss-green parka, her jeans, even her pullover underneath her jacket was wet. Rain kept trickling down the side of her face, out of her auburn hair and if she started crying now, the tears would be lost due to the horrible weather. 

Their plan had been simple: Ten days off. Ten days off from their jobs to relax, gather some power and come up with new ideas for their respective roles at their workplace. Gus had promised to take her places. She’d moved to London from the Netherlands some seven years ago. University had kept her bound to London a lot of the time, she’d never been out of town for long, except for a couple of day trips to Brighton and the beautiful Oxford. And the summer trips with Gus to scout new wine and excellent food. Gus had promised to show her where he’d spent a lot of his time as a child. 

_Auguste_ , Gus, himself was only half-English. His mother was French, his father had worked in France for many years, and ultimately met his wife there. Most of Gus’ living family still resided in the Southwest of France. His father’s parents had been living up north, in a secluded house on the outskirts of Whitby, next to the roaring sea. And after a stop in Manchester, that was their destination. 

They were just two hours out of London, with about two hours to go, when the car had started showing problems. 

Gus was absolutely useless with cars but she had a basic understanding of how things worked. Her father was a mechanic, had been all his life. As soon as the bucking had started, she’d made Gus stop at the next service station because something was very clearly wrong. She’d cursed, a couple of times. She had a perfectly functioning brand-new car in London. Her best friend had been very convincing in agreeing to take his old car though. 

‘One more time!’ he’d said, ‘One more time for old times’ sake!’ 

And that was an argument she couldn’t withstand. Gus’ old Ford had taken them everywhere in mainland Europe, a trusty companion up until the first time the motor gave up on them. Ever since then, there had always been minor or major problems with that damn vehicle and they should have just seen it coming really. 

Thankfully, her mobile phone went off. It was her dad finally replying to her unanswered calls. She described the problem to him and shot Gus an evil glare when her dad asked why exactly they didn’t have the car checked through before embarking on their trip. Sophie made Gus start the car again and put her phone closer to the motor, in hopes her dad might have any idea what was causing the problem. 

‘Might be the plugs,’ he told her, ‘but it could be anything. If you can - see if you can get a new set of plugs and change them. I taught you how.’ 

She squinted her eyes. He was right, he had taught her. But Gus’ car looked entirely different. 

‘Okay. Thank you. I’ll let you know how that goes!’, she told her father and hung up. 

She told Gus what her dad had explained and then looked over to the service station. 

‘Do you think that’s gonna fix it?’ Her friend asked. She shrugged. 

‘It’s the best shot we have. Look, I’ll see if I can get what we need over there, pop to the loo and come back. Don’t do anything stupid, okay?’, She gave him another glare and grabbed her wallet from inside the navy blue car. Pulling the hood of her parka over her hair - not that it did anything for her hair now that she was drenched anyway - she set her foot down from curb. 

The loud honking of a vehicle made her whip her head around. She stared into the angry headlights of a bus and just managed to stumble backwards, falling onto her bum right into a puddle. 

‘Are you okay?,’ Gus called over from where he was rummaging in the boot of the car. 

‘Yes!’ She snapped angrily, closing her eyes once and taking a heavy breath. She loved him, really, she did but this was somehow his fault. Naturally, she wasn’t going to take it out on him but all things considered - yes, it was his fault. Another deep breath and she got up, taking brisk steps over to the lit-up service station, ignoring that the giant bus had pulled to a halt in their proximity. 

The station were fairly quiet as it was still so early in the morning that not a lot of drivers frequented it. Sophie found her way to the loos and had a look in the mirror. She’s left the comfort of her own bathroom just three hours ago with a little make up on and dry hair. Mascara was running down her left cheek and her hair was soaking wet. She pulled it into a ponytail and squeezed some of the water out into the sink before tying it up into a bun. The premises were a disaster, and she barely wanted to touch anything. Only reluctantly, she used the toilet before washing her hands with a lot of soap and wiping away the black streaks of make up. 

Pulling her trousers down and up again had actually made her acutely aware of how uncomfortable she was in the set of drenched clothes and she wistfully had to think back to how cosy and warm her morning shower had felt. There were showers in this place but after seeing the state of the restrooms, she was fairly sure that she didn’t want to use any other facilities. 

She could hear some laughter and excited talking as she returned to the shop area. It was easy to spot the source of commotion: a group of blokes had entered the station and were browsing the aisle of snacks. She could only truly make out two of the faces as they were just a bit taller as the third guy, whose face was disappearing into a black hoodie anyway. He wore glasses, that much she could tell. 

The tallest of them wore a black and white jacket, the collar popped up, probably to try and shield his face against the rain, and the other guy was dressed all in black, an impressive beard growing on his face. Her elaborate guess was that they’d just hopped off the bus which had nearly run her over - or she had nearly run into, details could be up for discussion. They were obviously giggling over some inside jokes. 

Sophie ducked her head and made a beeline to where she guessed she might find car spare parts and was lucky to run into an employee who reminded her so much of her dad that she asked him for help instead of staring at the shelves for ages. She hated being lost and out of her depth but the other option was declaring their adventure over and going back home and she definitely wasn’t going to have any of that happen. Gus and her had been looking forward to their last stint of time off that year. 

‘I have a daughter your age - I’d hope someone would help her, if she found herself in the same situation,’ the man - Geoffrey as it turned out - told her, when Sophie thanked him profusely for going all out of his way to kit her out with the right set of plugs for that car she started to hate with a passion. ‘If you need any more help, just come back in and I’ll see what I can do for you! Safe journey!’ 

She waved as she exited the shop and actually mustered an honest smile. 

The rain had eased up a little more but the drizzle wasn’t much better. If anything, it only felt like it was creeping into her every pore. 

Gus had settled into the passenger seat of his car by the time she arrived back. He’d slicked back his wet, blond hair and was fiddling with the radio. She opened the door and popped her hair in. 

‘Sorry, Gus. I didn’t mean to snap at you’, she muttered. ‘Shall we try and get this fella running again?’ 

He turned to look at her. The skin around his eyes was already creasing and his lips were curled into a smile. They could never be mad at each other for long. 

‘Yeah, I want to get back on the road just as badly as you,’ he agreed. 

Gus helped her lift the bonnet up again and Sophie stared at the technical set-up before her. She lifted another plastic cover and found what she was looking for. 

‘Can you get me the little kit of tools my dad gave you for the car? It’s somewhere in the boot,’ she instructed Gus, carefully setting the cover aside. 

‘The - what?’ Gus replied. 

‘That blue bag?’ 

There was a long silence. He didn’t move. 

‘Gus?’ she asked. She straightened up. Her friend was grinning sheepishly at her. ‘What?’

Through very gritted teeth he mumbled, ‘I left it at home’. 

It wasn’t so much anger as it was desperation boiling in her guts. The trip was cursed, utterly cursed. She threw her hands up, looked at him incredulously and kicked the tyre hard. The searing pain in her ankle told her that she was probably overreacting. 

‘You do have a penchant for inflicting harm on yourself,’ said a deep, foreign voice. 

Sophie turned her head and looked behind her. She recognized the guy from earlier. It was the tall one, only he’d lost his jacket since and had a cigarette dangling from his fingers. Gus’ arm slipped around her shoulder. 

‘It’s one of these days,’ her friend said, ‘you don’t happen to have… a - what is it that you’re looking for, Soph?’ 

She rolled her eyes. ‘A ratchet.’ 

‘You don’t have a ratchet you could momentarily spare, mate?’ Gus tried again. 

The stranger laughed, taking a drag from his cigarette again. ‘I don’t have one on me, no,’ he said and blew out some smoke, ‘but I’ll see if our driver has a toolbox on board.’ 

‘Cheers, mate,’ Gus said, giving him a thumbs up. ‘We’ll be right here.’ 

Sophie groaned. ‘Did we really have to get other people involved?’ 

‘Can you quit being a moody cow?’ Gus retorted, leaning over to kiss her cheek. She had to smile at that. He’d called her out on her bullshit but was still being sweet about it. 

Sophie leaned against the side of the car, flexing her foot. It did hurt and she wondered whether she’d managed to sprain her ankle. She flexed it some more and took a tentative step. It definitely did hurt but she could still walk without too much trouble. Just then, their new acquaintance rounded the front of the bus, presenting them with the tool they’d asked for. 

‘Awesome, mate - you’re our hero -,’ Gus said, pausing because he realised he didn’t know the guys name. 

‘George,’ the guy supplied. 

‘Gus,’ Gus said, pointing at himself, ‘and that’s Sophie. Thank you, George.’ 

Sophie took the tool as George held it out for her and muttered a ‘thank you’ before setting to work. She cursed under her breath a couple of times but with the right tool it was a lot easier actually. Her friend struck up a conversation with George and while she couldn’t hear everything that was said she gathered that they were talking about their respective itineraries. 

The entire procedure took her approximately ten minutes. As she next lifted her head away from the bonnet, ready to call for Gus to start the engine, she found that her friend wasn’t only talking to George but that a few guys had come over to join the conversation. George was currently gesturing towards the end of the bus and Gus was nodding, a cigarette now dangling from his fingers as well. 

Sophie cleared her throat. But obviously, that didn’t catch her friend’s attention. 

‘Gus!’ she called. 

One of the young man turned around. Oh, she recognized him too. A pair of black-rimmed glasses was shoving his hair out of his face, although he’d party shaved off some of it anyway. He grinned at her and then reached over to touch Gus’ shoulder, nodding his head towards Sophie.   
Gus sauntered over, quirking his eyebrow into the direction of the driver’s side. She nodded at him and he opened the door. He sat down in the seat and then loudly counted down from three to one before he turned the guy in the ignition. The car started and it sounded good, so far. He slowly pushed the pedal down and the vehicle didn’t stutter. 

‘Do it again.’ Sophie called. The second attempt went well, too. Gus turned the car off and came around to the front, patiently waiting for her to fix the cover in place and then shutting the bonnet. 

‘Well done, you,’ Gus mumbled into her wet her, when he wrapped her in a hug once she’d finished. ‘What would I do without you, eh?’ 

‘Lead a really boring life,’ she replied, kissing his cheek, ‘Do you wanna grab some clothes and get dry and changed? They even have showers over there. I’m freezing.’ 

He nodded at that. 

When they had pulled apart, she picked up the tool they had borrowed. She sauntered over to George, fully aware that she had four pairs of eyes watching her approach, fully aware that she looked like a drowned rat and rather pitiful. 

‘Thanks for that,’ she said, handing the ratchet over, ‘it did the trick.’ She was talking to George, so it surprised her that someone else spoke up. 

‘Had a lovely morning then?’ It took a moment to place the voice, but it was the one who had told Gus that she was calling out to him. 

‘Matty!’ George chided and addressing her, ‘sorry. Don’t listen to him.’

She shrugged. ‘Excellent morning, mate. I just loooove surprises.’ It made all of them laugh, at least. 

‘Matty,’ the cheeky one said and extended his hand. 

She shook it, realising how cold her hands actually were - and how dirty. ‘Sorry, sorry - be careful there. You’ll get oil everywhere. Shit. Uhm. Sophie, by the way.’ She wiped her hand on her jeans, when he released it from his grip, which had lingered oddly long. Her fingers left black imprints on her trousers. 

‘Don’t worry, serves me right, I guess,’ Matty replied, taking a drag from the cigarette in his other hand, ‘you must be freezing to death though.’ 

She nodded at that, avoiding his glance because wow, she really must have looked a mess. 

‘Yeah, we need to get changed before we set off. I’m just dreading how sanitary those facilities are,’ Sophie said, nodding her head into the direction of the station. Matty pulled a face at that. 

‘Jamie -‘ George suddenly called out to a man standing a little far off. ‘How much longer until we set off?’ 

Gus threw an arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his side. He was still equally as drenched and it did nothing to warm her up but she leant her head on his shoulder as she always did. ‘Wanna get it over with?’ 

She nodded at that, but George raised a hand, ‘Give me second.’ 

He strode over to the man he’d called Jamie, exchanged a couple of words and came back over. ‘You can change on there, and we do have running water as well, so you can get cleaned up a little. We might even supply you with some hot beverages.’ George pointed towards the bus. 

‘We really, really - can’t,’ Sophie started. ‘That’s generous of you but we don’t want to get in the way.’ 

‘You’re not getting in the way,’ Matty was quick to reply. ‘Grab your stuff.’ 

She looked at Gus, who shrugged. ‘Ross here,’ he said and pointed at the other guy she had seen in the shops with Matty and George, ‘and I still need to exchange opinions on the last game.’ 

Ross gave her a small wave. She smiled and shrugged in reply. ‘Might as well.’ 

Her friend had to carry both their things as her hands were still greasy, even after wiping them on her ruined jeans a couple of times. She locked up the car and followed him following the guys. 

‘We haven’t been introduced yet, but I’m Adam,’ said the fourth of them, whom she hadn’t spoken to yet. He’d let himself hang back a little. 

‘Sophie,’ she replied and gave him a smile, ‘sorry, I could have introduced myself.’ 

‘So, Sophie, where did you learn how to fix cars?’ 

She started explaining how her dad had taught and was so caught up in her conversation with him that she didn’t even take in her surroundings for the first minute that they were actually on the bus. 

She stopped herself then, whistled and said ‘So, is this… a tourbus then?’ 

They all chuckled. 

‘I thought you’d figured out as much,’ Gus muttered. 

‘Ok, so, this… is awkward,’ Sophie mumbled. Her cheeks were definitely flushing. ‘Ok. What was the name of your band, I think I missed that..?’ 

She looked at Gus, then at George, who just said, ‘Don’t worry about that.’ 

‘No, honestly. I feel like I’m missing out on something here,’ she insisted.   
‘You remember that song, from earlier?’ Gus said and looked at her, ‘the one on the radio when we left the motorway? That was them.’ 

She nodded. She could vaguely remember the melody. ‘The… uh. That song about petticoats?’ 

At that point, Ross was laughing out loud. ‘That’s one way of putting it.’ 

‘The 1975. That’s us,’ Matty said, struggling to keep a straight face as well. 

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It was truly the worst morning she had had in a long time. Her brain was scrambling to pull together any information the band name should have given her. Or that song. But none of it made sense. They’d been on the radio, but she wasn’t quite so sure if it had been a local station. But then again - they’d been traveling on this massive nightliner. Maybe they were a big thing after all. 

‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I just work an awful lot and don’t spend too much time dabbling in pop culture, so… I’m a bit out of my depth there. Why are you in on all of it..?’ 

Gus shrugged. ‘Because I don’t live under a rock?’ 

She shoved him to the side. 

‘It’s cool. Really. We’ve been told our music sucks, on more than one occasion, so we can’t fault you for missing out. You probably haven’t missed out on anything,’ Adam said and they all started laughing again. 

Ross started the kettle which was sitting on the kitchenette. 

‘If you go through there, all the way up, there’s enough room for you to get changed. And the door on the right, that’s the toilet. It’s all very small but you should be able to clean up in there,’ George said, pointing towards the end of the bus. There was another lounge, she could see a couple of bags and suitcases stacked up there. She nodded and walked along the aisle, trying not to glance into the bunks on either side. 

She went into to wash her hands first. She could hear the conversation was still going on at the front, she could hear the kettle go off and her nerves calmed a little. They were a nice bunch of guys and she could probably have seen it all coming but then again, she’d been distracted by the car issues. 

Once the water ran clean and all the grease had come off, she splashed her face with some water and wiped off all of the ruined make up with the small towel she’d brought with her. Eventually, she slipped into the lounge and closed the door behind her. As she stripped off the wet clothes, she noticed how cold her skin was to the touch. What an awful morning. 

When she was dressed again, she let her hair down and combed her fingers through it. There was really no point in being vain now, but now that she knew Gus and her were in famous company, she wanted really badly to look less like a drowned rat. There was still laughter and some shouting coming from the front. Ross and Gus were definitely disagreeing about something having to do with football. She quirked and eyebrow at them, and squeezed past Gus to where Adam was offering her a seat at the table. 

She put the lump fo wet clothes down by her feet and watched as Gus retreated to the back. 

‘Your boyfriend wasn’t quite sure how you drink your tea,’ Ross told her, ‘have you not been together for long?’

‘I just said she’d recently been drinking it differently!’ Gus called from the back before closing the door behind him. 

She had to cackle at that. ‘It’s true, I’m trying to cut the sugar down. One sugar, a splash of milk. Thank you. But just for the record, he’s not my boyfriend. God, no. We’ve been friends for a really long time now. He’s more like my brother.’ 

‘It just seemed like -‘ George started. 

‘We get that a lot. But it definitely wasn’t me, stumbling out of his room last night, right into my arms,’ Sophie singsonged, ‘sorry, TMI, probably. But it’s not like that. Eww.’ 

Ross handed her a cup of tea that she promptly had to put down on the table because it was too hot for her to hold. Her hands were still freezing. 

‘He said you are on your way up to Whitby by way of Manchester,’ Adam said. ‘Something about a family home up there.’ 

‘His grandparents lived there. The family is now taking turns in checking in on the house there. I think they had some of it refurbished too over the summer. I’ve never been there, but I’ve seen photos. Seems dreamy, a lot different from London,’ Sophie replied and took another sip of tea. ‘He’s spent a lot of time there as a child. It’ll be nice to… just chill. And you’ve come back from… Europe. I couldn’t listen to all of the conversation earlier but I think I heard something about Germany and France.’ 

‘These guys have been very much in demand everywhere,’ said Jamie, who appeared at the top of the stairs leading onto the bus. ‘We’ve been on the road for a while but it was mainland Europe those last three weeks. I’m Jamie, hi.’ 

He extended his hand and she shook it. ‘Sophie,’ she replied, ‘I’m probably the only person on this planet who hasn’t caught onto the hype.’ 

She had them laughing again, but it felt less awkward than before. 

‘How long are you staying in Manchester for?’ Ross asked. 

‘Two nights. So, tonight and tomorrow night,’ she replied. 

‘You should come to our show. See for yourself and decide if we are worth the hype,’ Matty said, ‘I’m sure Jamie can put you on the list.’ 

‘I thought you were done touring?’ she replied. 

‘One last hometown show,’ George explained, ‘we’ll have our families come out for the night, too. Are you up for it?’ 

Sophie shrugged. ‘Considering Gus actually knows about your music, I’m pretty sure he’d love to catch that show. Yeah, if it’s no trouble to you. We could do with a night out.’ 

Jamie nodded and put a note in his phone, while Matty held out his phone to her. ‘Leave us your number.’ 

‘Us, huh?’ George muttered under his breath, but she still heard him. She blushed but took the phone from Matty’s hand anyway. 

‘I’ll check in with you before the show, see if we can give you a tour of the venue. Find you decent spots to watch,’ he explained and winked at her. 

Gus came back from the other end of the bus, clutching his clothes under one arm and holding his cup of tea in the other. 

‘Did I miss anything?’ he asked. 

‘We’ve been invited to their show. I figured you’d want to go, so I said yes on your behalf,’ Sophie told him. Gus squeezed himself in next to her, so she was wedged in tightly between Adam and him.

‘You lead, and I’ll follow. Always,’ Gus replied, kissing her temple. ‘Thanks for the invitation.’ 

Sophie finished up her tea and glanced at Gus’ watch. It had gotten late. ‘Right, thank you for the hospitality. I suppose you have places to be.’ 

Jamie nodded, ‘We should have been back on the road twenty minutes ago. But both of you looked like you needed warming up.’ 

Sophie blushed again and nudged Gus with her elbow, ‘Come on, we can’t take up more of their time.’ 

Her friend got up and while doing so, gathered her pile of clothes in his arms as well. He thanked them and disappeared down the stairs. 

‘We’ll see you tomorrow, then,’ Sophie said, ‘I’ll try and not let myself be manipulated by the critics until then.’ She winked and followed Gus down the stairs. 

They weren’t even halfway on the way to their car when her phone announced a new message from an unknown number. 

_‘Until then, maybe try and stay out of harm’s way. M’._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘That’s unexpected’, Gus said, casting Sophie a confused look. She could read it. It was him asking if she’d pulled some strings with Matty after all and that it had been planned. 
> 
> ‘But not impossible,’ Matty replied, lightening up a cigarette and passing the lighter on to George. 
> 
> ‘Almost impossible. Gus hates eating burgers, but maybe you can tell him that they do decent food here,’ Sophie explained. 
> 
> ‘We’ve actually just arrived,’ Jamie told her. ‘One last supper before this leg of the tour is truly over.’ 
> 
> ‘Well, enjoy your food. Enjoy your night,’ she said and took a step towards the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I switched a couple of things around when I edited the first chapter, so that I had to alter some bits in the second chapter. And then just wrote the whole thing again from scratch. 
> 
> Back with an update; hope you all had a lovely couple of Christmas Days!

Very obviously, it was a message from Matty and it sent her head spinning a bit, but not because he was apparently some celebrity she should have known. She wasn’t quite sure if she’d seemed interested in him. Someone showing interest in her made her uncomfortable. 

Gus and her, they kept telling people that they were the best of friends and it wasn’t a lie. But if she insisted that she never noticed how he catered to her every need, how he’d sometimes look at her and put her above anyone else ,then that was a blatant lie. She had noticed the shift in his affection over the last year but their friendship was just too precious. His family had practically adopted her. She didn’t think of him that way. 

Obviously, Gus was handsome with his blond hair, the sharp cheekbones and well-trained body but he just wasn’t her type, in the looks department.

He was a much finer person on the inside though. He was hard-working and loyal, shared her humor and called her out on her bullshit when it got too much. He was dead honest with her, as long as they didn’t talk about his feelings for Sophie.

And that was the problem. She wasn’t blind and she knew. And so she kept herself from dating anyone because it made him uneasy and moody, even if he kept dating girls and hosting over-night guests. 

Sophie insisted she had no time to build a serious connection with anyone and that was that. 

They had each other. 

And so she left the message unread and unanswered, even if that foreign, new guy had been handsome and shared her humor on some level. Sophie didn’t mention it to Gus, had no plans on doing so, but then she left her phone on top of the table at the café, which they visited that afternoon. 

After checking into their hotel, they had agreed to go out on a little walk to stretch their legs. The rain had cleared up, they’d been in the car for quite some hours that morning and they’d didn’t have that much time in Manchester to explore before moving on to Whitby. 

That little walk turned into a little adventure as they managed to get lost in the streets. 

‘Do you want to grab some coffee before we try and figure out how to get back to the hotel?‘ Gus asked as they passed a little café. She shrugged. It was a good idea really. Getting drenched in the morning had made her energy levels drop. 

Gus turned on his heel and held the door to the café open. She chose a table by the window, threw her coat over the back of her chair and dropped her belonging on top of the table. 

‘I’ll be right back. If you do order, I’ll have a cappuccino and any sort of cake that sounds nice,’ she told Gus and disappeared into the restroom. 

When she got back, Gus was staring at her phone. It wasn’t unusual of them to answer each other’s phone and read out new messages to each other when one couldn’t reach or handle their own phone. But usually, there was nothing to hide. 

‘So, you said I hadn’t missed out on anything earlier this morning. Care to elaborate on why Matty would try flirting with you?’ Gus teased. 

‘It says ‘M’,’ she said, ‘it might just as well be not him and meant for someone else.’ 

‘Now you are being ridiculous,’ her friend told her. It wasn’t that he disapproved of her dating anyone. But whenever it got just a little more serious or a guy stuck around a little more permanently, Gus would find fault in anyone. He loved to taunt her for her mediocre flirting skills.   
‘Since we are on the topic: Who was the tall blonde one this morning?’ Sophie replied, trying to distract from the topic at hand. 

Gus shook his head. ‘I don’t think you need to remember her name. After she ran into you, she headed home quite fast.’ 

Sophie rolled her eyes. Gus never told girls that he was living with someone else, or at least not with his female best friend. She discreetly tried to let her phone vanish in her purse but he wasn’t having any of it. 

‘I think you should get on board with his flirting. He doesn’t look like a troll, he’s showing interest. And if it doesn’t work out quite right, you might not have to see him after tomorrow night,’ Gus said. 

Sophie choked on her drink. ‘You know that I don’t… I’m not like you.’ 

‘You haven’t been on a date since… how long has it been? A year?’ her friend asked. He looked at her. ‘You’ve got nothing to lose really. I bet he’s a good shag.’ 

‘Gus!’ she cried out and blushed. Sophie hid her face behind her hands. She hadn’t thought about that but now her friend had given her ideas. She shook her head and looked around the café, marveled at all of the bouquets of fresh flowers on each available surface. She didn’t want to think about any of it anymore. She didn’t do random hookups and she didn’t go on dates. And she had no interest in talking to Gus about why. 

She’d just have to wait until Gus met The One until she could find someone for herself. 

Once they were served their sweet treats, the conversation seemed forgotten between them - only it kept replaying in her head. Maybe, just maybe she thought that Matty was attractive. And maybe, just maybe he was her type, but she definitely, most definitely, didn’t… flirt. 

**

Back at their hotel, Gus crashed onto the bed and promptly dozed off. She rolled her eyes, but fondly, knowing he’d probably only gotten half as much sleep as her the night before.

Sophie pulled the one chair in the room away from the small table and up to the window. She could look out into the street, watched a couple of people walk by. The sheets on the bed were rustling but only because Gus turned onto his side, mumbling something in his sleep. 

It was quiet. She wondered when she’d last sat down anywhere and had done absolutely nothing. She gently let her head fall against the window and took a deep breath. At the beginning of February, she’d been offered the new position at the hotel Gus and her worked at. She’d been promoted, was now maîtresse d’hôtel and in charge of a team of 30 people. Her phone was pretty much always buzzing with new messages, someone was always waiting to speak to her. The only downtime during working days and nights she got was when she snuck into the kitchen, stole the odd cigarette off Gus, who had been chef de cuisine and head of his own team far longer than her, and wove out the back door. It was equally a blessing and a curse to be working with him because he understood when she had bad days. But they took work home with them far too many nights. On top of it, she’d decided to enhance her skills and signed up for additional training. 

So really, she never truly had the time to switch off. 

Gus groaned and propped his head up on his arms, looking at her. 

‘What is it?’ he asked. 

She shrugged. ‘Just happy to do nothing at all.’ 

‘Have you thought about dinner yet?’

Going out for food was always an adventure with Gus because he was picky about everything. It came with his job description. She usually let him choose where to go. When they went on holiday, he’d study the regions specialties and find out which restaurant locals praised most. 

For their current trip, she’d asked just one thing. 

‘Can we, for once, just be young and careless and go for a burger like people our age do?’ she’d said a few weeks back when they’d handed in their application for leave and had been granted their time off. 

He’d raised his left eyebrow at her, something he only did when he was genuinely irritated. Gus hated the concept of ‘a burger’: The number of toppings, the idea of ruining a perfect slice of meat to stuff a bun. 

‘I have,’ she replied, ‘and we are going to have a perfectly good burger. I investigated’.   
And by investigated, she meant that she’d reserved a table at the place that had the best ratings on TripAdvisor. 

He grimaced but got up from the bed and disappeared into the bathroom. 

She straightened the duvet and plumped up the pillow he’d messed up. The room was quite large and she was sure Gus had paid more for it than they’d agreed on initially. While their newly renovated flat was all sharp edges and reflecting surfaces, Gus had booked them into a very classic, chic hotel which was decked out in dark woods and heavy fabrics. It felt cosy and comforting. 

‘Do I need to doll myself up?’ he called through the closed door. 

She rolled her eyes again. ‘Nah, don’t try and impress me.’ 

‘Oh, fuck off.’ 

While he was - probably - shaving, she changed into another blouse and a pair of jeans. She made a mental note to put on the washing machine once they got to Whitby. At that speed, she would run out of clothes to wear soon. 

**

She’d gotten directions on the internet and led them through the streets. The weather was holding up okay, but the temperature had dropped considerably. Or maybe, Sophie was still feeling the chill from earlier that day. She pulled her jacket shut around her as Gus and her rounded another corner. 

‘Do you think it is still…’ Gus started but he trailed off. They could see the neon sign advertising their destination. But what was far more interesting were the people standing outside smoking. She spotted George’s tall frame and his unruly hair first. Secondly, Matty’s laughter rung out in the almost empty street. 

It was Jamie who raised a hand in greeting. George and Matty turned around. 

There was an awkward moment in which no one knew how to react, until George extended an arm towards her and pulled her into a short hug in greeting. When she pulled away, she passed over to Jamie and then Matty. He’d lost the pair of glasses, which had held his hair out of his face in the morning, and was wearing a black shirt. A tattoo was peaking out where he’d left the first couple of buttons open. The conversation between Gus and her replayed in her head and she tried not to blush as she pulled away from him. 

‘That’s unexpected’, Gus said, casting Sophie a confused look. She could read it. It was him asking if she’d pulled some strings with Matty after all and that it had been planned. 

‘But not impossible,’ Matty replied, lightening up a cigarette and passing the lighter on to George. 

‘Almost impossible. Gus hates eating burgers, but maybe you can tell him that they do decent food here,’ Sophie explained. 

‘We’ve actually just arrived,’ Jamie told her. ‘One last supper before this leg of the tour is truly over.’ 

‘Well, enjoy your food. Enjoy your night,’ she said and took a step towards the door. 

‘We’ll catch you tomorrow,’ Gus said, pulling the door open for Sophie, so she could step in. These three guys waved after them, while the rest of them who were already seated at a huge long table, waved in greeting as they passed. There were quite a few more people at the table than Gus and her had met on the bus earlier in the day. 

Once they were seated at their table, Gus gave her a stern look. ‘Don’t pretend you didn’t have anything to do with it.’ 

‘I didn’t. Honestly. I never replied to his message,’ she explained, whipping out her phone and showing him the thread of their conversation which held exactly one message, namely Matty’s.

‘Well, the way he just scanned the room for you, I’d guess he’d love it if you got in touch,’ Gus told her before lowering his head to have a look at the menu. 

She didn’t reply to that quip, but she hated that she was sitting with her back turned to the guys’ table. Sophie had liked the way Matty’s hand had lingered on her shoulder. She’d liked the whiff of his cologne. But more than anything she was sure that it had been Gus who’d planted the idea in her head that she liked Matty. 

‘Get us a large bottle of water to share. And I’ll have that one,’ Gus told her, pointing towards the name of a craft beer on the drinking menu. 

‘Are you sure that you don’t want a glass of wine? The selection is pretty decent,’ she said. 

He shook his head and got up, excusing himself to the restrooms. 

The young waiter came over and took the order for drinks. 

She liked the lofty design of the restaurant, the mix of dark industrial elements and large window panes which gave of the impression that you were almost sitting outside. Sophie studied the design of the menu some more, let her fingers run over the wooden table top and the leather seat she was sitting on. 

The restaurant Gus and her worked at was far more classical - a little old-fashioned even. The actual owner had been talking about renovating, but when she’d shown up with some ideas for a re-design, she’d been frowned up on. They weren’t going to ‘change their image’. 

Sophie had sighed at that but held onto the clippings she had collected. She had a sketchbook at home which she used for collecting ideas for a venture of her own, or rather, of their own. She’d only ever give it a try with Gus by her side. But she was fully aware that he was still young enough to make it in the culinary world, go after those Michelin stars and make a huge name for himself. She wasn’t going to ask him to give up on his dreams. 

From the corner of her eyes, she could see a pair of shoes approaching her. It weren’t Gus’. 

‘Do you want to come over and sit with us?’ Matty asked, leaning his hip against the side of their table and folding his arms against his chest. Sophie raised her head to meet his gaze. A smile was playing across his face and he looked actually hopefully. 

‘Oh, we wouldn’t want to disturb you and your crew. Thank you - but if this your last night as a team, Gus and I better stick to ourselves,’ she said, but smiled at him. 

‘Come on,’ George called over from the big table, motioning for her to come over. 

‘You heard him. Come on,’ Matty tried again, ‘I wouldn’t be asking if they didn’t agree.’

She sighed but nodded. ‘I’ll have to ask Gus first though.’

‘Ask me what?’ her friend asked, as he approached the table. 

‘We’ve been invited to sit at their table. They insist we’re very welcome to eat with them. What do you say?’ Sophie explained. 

Gus shrugged. ‘I don’t see why not.’ 

Sophie nodded and gathered her jacket and bag, letting Matty lead the way over to their table. Everyone was quick to pull over two chairs and scoot a little closer together to make room for them. Sophie made sure that their waiter found them with their drinks. 

Gus was sitting across from her next to George and one of the tour crew while she’d been seated between Matty and Adam. She looked around the table, mirrored a couple of friendly smiles with her own before looking over at Gus who smiled at her over the rim of his glass. She rolled her eyes at him - she’d stopped counting how often a day she did that - and reached for her glass of wine. 

‘Which one did you go for?’ Matty asked her as she took a sip. She didn’t reply at once, let the wine wash across her tongue. 

She could see Gus still smiling at her before turning to speak to Matty. ‘The chardonnay from France. We’ve been to Chablis in the summer.’

‘Is it good?’ Gus asked. 

‘Might have aged in an oak barrel. So, yeah, really good,’ she said, swiveling the glass around and holding it up against the light, ‘Reminds me of your parents’ house in the countryside. Those juicy apples and those sour gooseberries we picked. Look at the colour of it - like someone caught the first rays of sunshine in the early morning and poured them in a bottle. It smells like the vast vineyards after that tremendous storm.’ 

She realised that everyone at the table had fallen silent. 

‘Sorry, I was just…,’ she trailed off, blushing. She averted her eyes briefly. 

‘Petrichor,’ Matty said, finding her gaze again. 

‘Pardon?’ Sophie replied, not sure what he had said. 

‘Petrichor. That’s the word for it. The smell of rain on dry soil,’ Matty explained. She nodded at him and was relieved that conversation around them picked up again. 

‘Petrichor,’ Sophie repeated, letting the letters of the word wash across her tongue like the wine. ‘I like that.’ 

‘Are you a sommelière?’ Matty asked. 

‘Not yet,’ Sophie said, ‘I’m on my way. Taking classes and undergoing training. But apart from that, I’m always on the hunt for a good bottle of vino.’ 

Matty nodded and motioned towards her glass,’ May I-?’

Sophie hesitated for a second, but held her glass out for him to take it. She let her hand linger on the stem of the glass as he reached for it. He took the smallest sip and closed his eyes. ‘I don’t taste the gooseberries but I get the vibe.’ 

‘France in the summer was dreamy,’ Sophie said. ‘His parents have the nicest garden full of fruit-bearing trees and colourful flowers.’ 

After that, they fell into an easy conversation about traveling to France, how the band had played a festival there in the middle of the summer, about where Gus’ family had come from. They got so entangled their stories that the waiter asking for their food orders caught them off guard. 

Gus was wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at her when he handed her a menu, so that Sophie could quickly choose something to eat. 

‘What did you order?’ she asked him as Matty was talking to their waiter. 

‘The one with the three types of cheese,’ Gus replied. ‘The meat might be ruined but maybe the cheese will be alright.’ He winked at her but she knew he was only partly joking. 

A hand on her left arm startled her. ‘Do you want to share of bottle of that wine?’ 

Matty cocked his head to the side and smiled at her. 

‘I’m not sure I’ll have more than two glasses but it’s too good to say no’, Sophie replied. 

‘Can we get a bottle of the wine and another glass?’ Matty asked the waiter. The young man squinted at the glass in front of Sophie. 

‘It’s the French white, the chardonnay,’ she helped, to which the young man gave her a thumbs up. 

It was Adam then who picked up the conversation again, asking why Gus wasn’t keen on eating burger meat. Her friend explained what he was working as, which sort of cuisine he usually liked and let himself be called a food snob by Sophie. 

‘You’ll have to make reservations one night at the restaurant, so we can return the favour,’ Gus said. 

‘You haven’t even been to the show yet,’ George laughed. 

‘Yeah, I’m fairly sure it will be nothing short of brilliant,’ Sophie interjected, ‘I left you my number, feel free to ask for a table anytime.’ Gus explained where they were located and how long he’d been there. He was just recounting the story of Sophie’s first day at the restaurant, when Matty leant in just a little closer. 

‘Will you actually confirm the reservation or will that message go unanswered like mine?’ he asked in a low voice, so that anyone else would have trouble hearing him. Sophie could feel the heat rising in her cheeks again. She’d been caught. 

Before she could reply, the waiter showed up with the additional glass and the bottle of wine. Matty topped up her glass and poured himself one. He gently clinked his glass against hers and said, ‘To unexpected friends.’ 

She nodded and took another sip of the wine but at the same time she caught George, Adam and Gus exchanging knowing looks. She kicked a leg under the table, hard, and hoped she’d not hurt anyone else. But Gus’ glare was murderous. 

‘Do you think there might be time for another cigarette before they start serving food?` George asked. ‘You coming, Matty?’ 

But Matty shook his head. ‘I’ll pass on that one.’ George, Jamie and Gus left the table while Adam excused himself and disappeared into the direction of the restrooms. Ross got up to talk to some of the guys on the other end of the table, which left Sophie on her own with Matty.

‘You were saying about the unanswered message,’ he reminded her. 

‘I didn’t mean to not reply. But I didn’t want… I don’t know. I didn’t want to strike up a random conversation. I don’t… do that..?’ she stuttered. It was almost the truth. She talked to people, she just didn’t flirt. 

‘You seem pretty eloquent, to be honest,’ Matty replied with a wink. 

‘I couldn’t think of anything entertaining to say… considering you’re a fairly famous guy and I lead a pretty boring life,’ she clarified. 

He leant into her space a little and her nose filled with the scent of his cologne again, like it had done earlier in the evening when they’d hugged. ‘Can I let you in on a secret?’ 

She shrugged. 

‘I like that you are, seemingly, not phased by it,’ he explained, ‘it’s refreshing to be having a ‘normal’ conversation with someone my age, who is not trying to get in my good books, or pants for that matter, because they’ve heard my music on the radio.’ 

‘Oh come on, it must be quite a rush to the head to get up on stage and have a fair few thousand people sing your lyrics back at you,’ Sophie told him. 

‘I didn’t say that I don’t like it. I love the kids who come to our show but sometimes, it’s just nice to hang out with people and talk about their lives rather than ours on the road,’ Matty clarified. 

‘I’m sorry I know so little about your band. And I’m sorry to ask about your life,’ Sophie said but Matty grinned and motioned for her to continue, ‘but I imagine tour life is a bit easier when you’re on the road with your friends. I presume you’ve all been friends for a while.’ 

Matty laughed at that, loudly. 

‘Care to share the joke?’ Adam said, as he came back to the table. 

‘Sorry, I’m not laughing about you,’ he told Sophie, touching her arm again, ‘but it’s ridiculous how long this band has existed before we got the recognition we get now. They’re not just friends, they are family.’ 

‘D’aww,’ Adam commented before he took a swig from his glass of beer, ‘Actually, it went like this…’ And then Adam told her about the band in their current set up had come into being. Matty threw out a fair few comments here and there. 

The smoking party re-joined the table soon enough and eventually their food was served. It looked delicious but was obviously not as styled out as any of Gus’ plates would leave the kitchen. She watched as her friend inspected the plate and she actually paused eating when he took his first bite. She let him try a second and a third bite before asking, ‘What do you think?’ 

Gus swallowed and then enumerated a couple of spices the patty had been seasoned with before trying all parts of the burger on their own - the sauce, the patty, the different types of cheese, the chutney and the bun. He gave her a rundown of it all and Sophie realised for the first time how slowly the two of them were actually eating. 

‘So, what’s the verdict then?’ she asked eventually. 

Gus sighed. ‘I hate to say it but… this might be the best burger I ever had. Granted, I didn’t have many and it might be due to the excellent cheese but it’s good.’

‘Thank God for that. I wouldn’t have heard the end of it tonight otherwise.’

The guys around them laughed. 

‘Oh, we forgot to take a picture of it!’ Gus exclaimed suddenly. 

‘What, your food?’ Matty asked incredulously. 

‘Yeah, yeah. He runs… he puts micro reviews up on Instagram when we actually eat out. Which doesn’t happen often,’ Sophie said, ‘we can order dessert, Gus, and put up a photo of that instead.’ 

‘What if dessert doesn’t live up to my expectations?’ Gus retorted. 

She ran a hand over her face. ‘You are impossible.’ 

‘You do realise that you sound like an old, married couple?’ Ross asked. 

‘I know. I don’t know why I put up with her bickering,’ Gus agreed, tipping his glass into Ross’ direction. 

‘Because you love me, that’s why,’ she said, blowing him kisses over the table. But she did notice sadness washing over his face. 

‘Yeah, I do,’ he muttered, but hardly anyone heard him because they were all still laughing. She saw Gus’ face fall as Matty touched her arm when he struck up the conversation with her again. Adam asked about that social media account and the moment between Gus and her was over. 

  
After dinner and a round of shots, Sophie was back on her from the loo, when she caught Jamie settling the tab for the entire table at the bar. 

‘You don’t have - Jamie, no. Thank you, but we’d rather -‘ she protested all the way back to the table. 

‘Shh,’ Jamie said, ‘it was our pleasure.’ 

‘Thank you, honestly,’ she said again, squeezing Jamie’s shoulder as he settled back into his seat. 

‘It just means you might have to invite us ‘round for food more than once,’ Matty said as she sat down in her spot again. She giggled and shrugged. 

‘I don’t see why not.’ The wine had truly loosened her tongue. 

‘Do you ever cook, or is that his job at home?’ George asked. 

‘We very, very rarely eat at home,’ she said, ‘I’m not even sure why we have a flat. It feels like I only ever shower and sleep there. But on the odd day we are at home, I’m usually in charge of breakfast.’ 

‘She’s pretty good at baking. Pastry, cakes. Even bread. That’s her bit,’ Gus agreed. 

‘Pretty good is a big compliment, coming from him,’ Sophie said with a wink at Gus, ‘Why eat crap food, when you’re living with the best chef in all of London?’ 

Some of the crew decided to call it a night and Sophie realized how late it had turned. Gus and her had an early start planned and she asked him if they were going to leave as well. He agreed, saying his thanks again before helping Sophie into her jacket. 

‘Right, I guess I’ll be seeing you tomorrow then?’ She asked. Everyone agreed. She raised a hand to wave goodbye and then let Gus lead her outside. 

‘You are so smitten,’ Gus said, once they were out on the street. She knew that deep down it was a painful realisation for him. But he covered it with a cheeky grin. 

‘I’m not. I’m just tipsy,’ she said, but she knew that he was right. 

  
Much later, when she was about to set the alarm on her phone for the next day, she had a new message. 

_‘Maybe **I** can invite you ‘round for food sometime. M.’_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘That’s ridiculous, really. Don’t you think if you went out with someone, say, as good-looking as me, and with decent manners, he’d be fine with it?’ Matty said, wiggling his brows. It made her laugh. She liked that her confession hadn’t put him off. He leaned in closer to her and whispered, ‘I’d be happy to free you from the shackles you’ve put yourself in.’ 
> 
> Sophie almost choked on her own spit. He’d put all sorts of indecent images in her head with just one sentence. 
> 
> ‘Don’t you have places to be? People to talk to? I bet your family would love it, if I didn’t steal anymore of their quality time with you,’ she said eventually, when she stopped coughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all had a brilliant start to 2021 and that this year will hold quite some awesome things for all of us! 
> 
> I made a mental note to at least update once a week, so here's that weekly update (Sundays are quite excellent writing days for me!).  
> Actually, I could have made this part much longer because there's more to that particular night but it's already long enough as it is.

Chapter 3 

_‘Maybe I can invite you ‘round for food sometime. M.’_

Sophie checked her phone again first thing in the morning, just to make sure her alcohol-clouded brain hadn’t played tricks on her. 

_‘You do realise that you’re up against tough competition?’_ She deleted it as fast as she’d typed it. She looked at his words again, put the phone down for a second and typed the sentence she’d dismissed again and hit sent. 

_‘I was hoping that my stunning appearance and charming ways would make up for it,’_ came Matty’s reply in an instant. She had to chuckle about it. He was flirting with her.

‘What’s so funny?’ Gus’ sleepy voice asked. 

She froze. There was no way she was going to tell him about it. 

‘Just some funny cat video on Facebook,’ she said, ‘I love a good cat-meme.’ 

He rubbed at his eyes with both hands and sat up. ‘Good morning. You’re a liar.’ 

‘Good morning,’ she replied, deciding to ignore his remark, ‘shall I put the kettle on before we go downstairs for breakfast?’ 

‘You are not a morning person. Why are you so chipper?’ Gus tried again. 

It was true. He was absolutely right. She wasn’t a morning person, not in the first twenty minutes after waking up anyway.

‘Did he text you again?’ Gus said. Sophie was sure that her friend could actually read her mind. There was no point in lying. 

‘He did. But - look, it’s just friendly banter. We’re going to the show tonight. We’ll probably just text back and forth after that for a day or two. They might not even ask for a reservation in the future. Don’t worry about it’, she said. 

‘I’m not worried. I actually kinda like him,’ Gus said, ‘you always apologise for flirting with guys. Why?’ 

It was because she saw how his face fell whenever she was paying more attention to another man than him. It pained her to know it was making him unhappy. Feelings were feelings though and she couldn’t change her feelings towards him, just how he couldn’t quit feeling more towards her. 

Sophie took a deep breath. ‘You know why.’

She disappeared into the bathroom, kettle in hand, to get some water. 

The conversation about that matter was over. 

  
The weather had cleared up outside and it was a beautiful autumn day which they spent by working their way through Sophie’s vast list of ‘must-sees’. She was especially impressed by the John Rylands library, while Gus was very happy that she’d put the National Football Museum on the list as well. 

At any given occasion, she tired to find the restrooms though, to quickly whip out her phone and check if there was a new message from Matty. 

_‘I’ve been spoilt these last couple of years. You were warned. Your charming ways are debatable. I recall you to be rather cheeky. S.’_ She’d replied in the morning. 

_‘I might have other qualities you have yet to discover. M.’_

She caught herself smiling. A little flirting wouldn’t hurt. 

_‘It sounds like you might want to make room for me in your busy schedule. I’m flattered. S’_

_‘Why wouldn’t I?_   
_I had a great time last night._   
_Let me know when you get to the venue, so I can find you for a drink. M.’_

‘Is everything alright?’ Gus asked her concerned when she returned to him. They were exiting the library building and headed out to find some coffee and a sandwich. 

She nodded. ‘I’m good. Just feeling… feeling the repercussions from last night. That wine was good but not as light as I thought.’ 

It was a white lie, in her head at least. The wine was to blame for feeling so comfortable in Matty’s company. She’d probably been a little more reserved, had she not had quite some glasses of wine. She would have still enjoyed his company though. His laugh was infectious. 

Gus took her down a couple of smaller streets and she followed. They were always on the hunt for independent cafés rather than the franchise ones. Gus told her what to pick up for him and waited outside lightening up a cigarette. 

Sophie watched as her friend paced up and down the street while she waited for their order. She did feel bad for keeping things from him. With each new message from Matty, she felt more excited about seeing him at the show. And the thought of their banter fizzling out after a few days did make her unhappy. That someone like him - good-looking, very busy, sort of famous - should find interest in her was flattering. And she wanted to go with it… wherever the flirting would take her. 

_‘I’ll ask Gus if we can be a bit early for once. Looking forward to being serenaded tonight. S.’_  
She scanned the message for any typos, then wondered if it was a little too much. Her finger hovered over ‘send’. 

‘Sophie, your order is ready!’ Hearing her name startled her. She jumped, dropped her phone into her purse and picked up the paperbag and cups from the counter. Once she had handed over Gus’ drink and the bag outside, she dug out her phone again. 

Oh, she had sent out that message. 

_‘In that case I shall not disappoint. M.’_

  
**

Sophie didn’t even have to ask Gus to return to the hotel and leave for the venue early. He suggested it all by himself as he seemed to be even more excited to go as her. 

‘I heard one of their songs a while ago, and I thought they were pretty decent. It’s nice to see that I wasn’t wrong and that I have good taste in music,’ he told Sophie when she asked him why. 

‘Am I really living under a rock? How did you even hear about them?’ 

‘We do have a radio back in the kitchen, you know? I probably know more about contemporary pop music than you these days,’ Gus replied. It was true. It had been her who’d been to a show every other night when they’d first met. But when she’d dropped out of uni and really started working to have some sort of career, she’d stopped doing many things for fun. Going to shows was one of them. Her job usually meant working in the evenings, on weekends and even on public holidays. But she’d chosen that path for her and most days, she didn’t miss any of it. 

She was too tired most of the time anyway. 

There was already a long queue outside the venue when they walked up. Sophie pulled out her phone to text Matty. It took him less than thirty seconds to reply and tell them to walk up to the main entrance, so that someone could pick them up. 

It was Jamie eventually, who popped his head around the door and waved them over. He cleared them with security and ushered them in, leading them further into a venue.   
The actual stage room looked massive, void of people, with the lights still on. 

A couple of people were bustling on stage, George amongst them. ‘Hey,’ he called out when he saw them. 

Adam appeared from behind a high tower of speakers and waved at them as well. ‘Do you wanna come up here? We’re just about done.’ 

Jamie led them around the barrier and Gus helped her to hoist herself up on the edge of the stage. 

‘This is impressive,’ she muttered. 

‘Yeah, and by far not the largest venue we played,’ Matty said close to her side. ‘Hi.’ 

She blushed because he was suddenly standing so close to her. ‘Hi,’ she replied. 

Adam briefly showed them around their set-up. Gus had at one point in his life had piano lessons and briefly tried his hand at playing the guitar, so he was keen on actually trying his rusty skills. Adam invited him to try any of the instruments he fancied. 

George had sat down on the floor and she settled herself next to him to watch what Gus was doing. Adam and Matty explained a couple of things to Gus. Ross showed up on her other side and asked what was going on. 

‘Gus used to play. In another life. We’ll see how that goes,’ she said and laughed out loud as Gus gave her the finger. 

But what he did was surprisingly good. Matty picked up his guitar and actually joined him. 

She knew the melody but couldn’t put a name to it. 

‘House of the rising sun,’ Adam said, ‘it’s easy to learn when you’re a beginner. I think all of us learnt that.’ 

‘You don’t play any instrument? No hidden musical talents?’ George asked Sophie. 

She shook her head. ‘None at all. I always wanted to learn how to play the guitar but my parents never let me. And I guess now it’s just a little late. I enjoy music though. I used to spent my summers at festivals all the time before work took over. Our restaurant is closed on Mondays. Gus and I actually started swing dancing a while back, so there is music in our lives, just off the Big Band variety.’ 

‘It’s never too late to pick up a hobby,’ George replied, ‘you started dancing, after all. Which is your favorite festival?’   
‘I’ve only been twice, but definitely Reading.’   
‘Did you go this year?’ Ross asked. 

‘No. Did you play Reading?’ She asked incredulously. 

Ross laughed. ‘Only the smaller BBC Introducing stage.’ 

‘One day, mate, one day we will headline,’ Matty called, putting away his guitar. 

‘I’m sure that will happen. I mean - I haven’t heard you play live yet but I’m convinced it’ll happen,’ Sophie told him. 

‘They have a number one record, it’s only a matter of time,’ Gus quipped up, handing Adam his guitar back and coming to stand over in front of her. 

‘Oh. Well. Didn’t you say that the critics hated your record?’ Sophie asked, confused. 

‘Yeah, the critics. People love it, apparently,’ Matty said, ‘I guess that’s what matters most. I’m eager to hear what you have to say.’ 

‘The critics. If only their opinions were valid, Gus would have long turned into an estate agent,’ Sophie replied. 

‘It might still happen, you know. Any job in hospitality isn’t much of a career path to my father,’ Gus said, a little sadly. 

‘And yet, it is what makes you happy,’ Sophie told him and got up, ‘and that is what matters most. Besides, they always congratulate me on my achievements. So, he can’t entirely hate the whole idea.’ She threw an arm around her friends’ shoulder and leant in to kiss his temple. 

‘Well. I hate to tell you that my parents love you like one of their own but… you’re a girl,’ Gus said, twirling her around. 

‘And that’s got to do with..?’ 

‘You know - you’ll get married at some point, have kids,’ Gus said as if it was an explanation. 

‘Oh, fuck no. Not gonna happen. Not in the next decade anyway. I know my parents and yours have teamed up to marry off to some… financial City hotshot. But that’s really not gonna happen,’ she said, ‘I’d rather be dead.’ 

Gus laughed. ‘Can’t really see you with kids anyway. I remember when you had to look after my cousins back in France. You were mortified.’ 

She nodded. 

‘So, you were talking about Big Band sounds?’ Matty interjected. 

‘Were you?’ Gus asked her. 

‘I mentioned that we’re taking dance classes and listen to a lot of it,’ she filled Gus in. ‘Lots of Count Basie, Glenn Miller Orchestra.’ 

‘Oh yeah. It sounds ridiculous. But it’s actually a lot of fun,’ Gus said. ‘It’s pretty much our weekly workout. You wanna see?’

‘No!’ Sophie cried, rolling her eyes. 

‘Yeah. Stage is all yours!’ Matty offered, spreading his arms to indicate they could use up all the space. 

‘I’m afraid I didn’t pack my dancing shoes,’ Sophie protested, trying to weasel her way out of it. She didn’t like being watched, much less when she was doing something that she wasn’t entirely good at. 

‘Don’t be a killjoy, come on. They’ll get up on stage to perform for you later on,’ Gus said, grabbing her hand. 

Matty sorted out their music. ‘Glenn Miller, you said? Will that do?’ He turned up the volume on his phone and a familiar tune started blaring out of it.

‘No funny business, Gus. No high kicks and throwing me about,’ she pleaded. 

‘Just stuff we practiced,’ he promised with a nod, squeezing her hand. 

’So. Ideally, we’d both be wearing dancing shoes, preferably with toe and heel taps. And Gus would be in a lovely waistcoat. Or at least suspenders. And I’d be wearing a floaty skirt or a dress. Just for the effect,’ Sophie said before Gus pulled her to his side. He quietly counted them in and then she started moving her feet. She felt self-conscious for about ten seconds before the dancing actually required her attention. Her show-smile came out, an exaggerated, excited one, and she let Gus spin her around, push her away, pull her in again all the while swiveling on her toes or kicking about. He’d promised her to be careful while leading but she knew he’d at least try to show off once. 

When she guessed what figure he was leading her into, she started protesting but had no choice than to go with it because otherwise, she’d have them topple over. She laughed as he pulled her in and bent his knees. She jumped, pulling her legs up and landed on his thigh for a second before he lifted her and let her drop to the floor again. 

But she slipped, her leg bending the wrong way and she could feel pain rising from her ankle all the way up her leg. For a second, she froze before staggering to her feet and picking up the dancing again. There wasn’t much left of the music and as it fizzled out, she realized that her ankle hurt a lot more than it should. She put on a brave face though. 

‘That looked like it hurt?’ Adam said unsure. 

‘I’ll be fine,’ she said but as she tried to put pressure on it, Sophie winced. 

‘Didn’t you hurt that foot yesterday, when you kicked the tyre?’ George asked her. 

She nodded. ‘Yeah. I think… I think I might have fucked up it for good now.’ 

Gus kneeled down before her and grabbed her left foot. ‘Well, I’m not sure but I assume that ankle is already swelling up.’

She cursed. 

‘Sorry, I shouldn’t have - ‘ Gus started. 

‘Nah, it’s fine. I tripped at work the other day and I guess it was bound to happen,’ she hushed him. ‘Probably just proper sprained it now. Good thing we’re off work.’ 

Gus sighed and got up. 

‘Come on, feel find you some ice and somewhere to sit,’ Matty suggested. Gus picked her jacket and purse and followed the guys. And she followed too. Just much slower. It was George who held the door and actually realised that walking wasn’t much of an option for her, at least unaided.

‘That really hurts, yeah?’ he asked. 

She shrugged. ‘I’ve been better, to be honest.’ 

He didn’t ask her if he could help, he just scooped her up with one arm supporting her shoulders and the other under her knees, bringing her into one of the many rooms in a rather long corridor. 

The room was actually full of people and it took her a second to actually spot Gus, who immediately came over when he saw her. ‘Is it that bad?’ he asked sheepishly. 

She nodded and thanked George as he put her down on a chair. Adam came over with a bag of ice. She toed off her shoe. That ankle really didn’t look good and there was a bruise already forming on the side. She tried to play it down nonetheless. 

Adam pointed out a couple of people, explaining whose family they were and she tried to remember names. Ross offered them drinks and then, Gus and her were on their own for a bit while everyone else was minding actual family business. 

‘I’m so sorry about it,’ Gus said again, ‘and I really think you need to get it checked out before we leave for Whitby.’ 

She was about to reply when Matty came over, yielding a bottle of wine and only two glasses. He stopped dead for a second, looking at Gus. But she shook her head at him. 

‘Sorry, I didn’t think that one through,’ Matty said, indicating he didn’t have a glass for all of them. 

‘It’s fine. Gus and I will share. I think I might quite a few pills later to ease the pain,’ she said, taking both the glasses into her hand, so that Matty could open the bottle. 

‘Maybe you can talk some sense into her. She definitely needs to get that checked out,’ Gus said to Matty, ‘I’ll be back in a second.’ 

He got up from where he’d been crouching next to her chair and left the room. 

Matty poured them both some wine, put the open bottle under her chair and took one glass from her. He clinked it against the glass remaining in her other hand and said ‘Cheers’ before looking down at her foot. 

‘He’s right. You should get that checked over,’ he sounded concerned. ‘Do you want us to get you a cab?’ 

She shook her head. ‘I’m not going to miss the show. I’ll have to go to A&E anyway. Whether I do it now or later tonight doesn’t matter.’ 

‘So, I won’t be stealing a dance with you at the afterparty,’ Matty laughed, ‘it just means I’ll have to take you dancing some other time.’ 

‘You do seem to want to spend quite some time with me,’ Sophie laughed nervously, ‘it’s just… not that easy.’ 

‘Oh - I thought you and Gus weren’t dating. And I assumed that you wouldn’t be… seeing someone else. I’m sorry if I crossed any… lines,’ Matty was quick to apologise. 

‘It’s not that. No. I’m not dating anyone. It’s just - Gus gets really jealous,’ she said. 

‘No one’s gonna try and break up your connection.’ 

‘That’s not what I meant - ‘ Sophie tried again. She turned her head to look Matty square in the face. He searched her eyes, raised his brows and sighed. 

‘I see. But - he’s your best friend. Surely he must wish for you to be happy. Or what’s your plan, otherwise? Are you just going to live celibate until he doesn’t show any interest in you anymore?’

‘Well, it has proven to be… a way to get by,’ she said and took a sip of wine. 

‘That’s ridiculous, really. Don’t you think if you went out with someone, say as good-looking as me, and with decent manners, he’d be fine with it?’ Matty said, wiggling his brows. It made her laugh. She liked that her confession hadn’t put him off. He leaned in closer to her and whispered, ‘I’d be happy to free you from the shackles you’ve put yourself in.’ 

Sophie almost choked on her own spit. He’d put all sorts of indecent images in her head with just one sentence. 

‘Don’t you have places to be? People to talk to? I bet your family would love it, if I didn’t steal anymore of their quality time with you,’ she said eventually, when she stopped coughing. 

‘Can’t leave you sitting here on your own, can I?’ Matty said. 

‘I’m fine, really. Gus will be back any second and we need to find me a nice and quiet place to sit and watch anyway.’ 

‘Jamie,’ Matty called out, ‘Jamie. Can you set her up somewhere? Side of the stage? It’s the closest option, really.’ 

Jamie winced as he saw her bruised ankle and the icepack. 

‘What did they do? And should you not get that..,’ he started. 

‘Looked at? Yeah, after the show. And they didn’t do anything. It’s my own fault.’ 

He nodded and motioned for her to follow him. As she hopped after him on one foot, purse, jacket and shoe clutched in her arms, she could hear the level of noise from the crowing crowd inside the venue growing louder. At the end of corridor, she found Gus leant against a wall, chatting to a pretty girl. 

Oh, wasn’t that right? He had disappeared looking like a lost little puppy when Matty had come over and now he was already chatting up someone else. She forced a smile anyway and said, ‘I’ll be out there, if you need me.’ 

He nodded and blew her a kiss before turning back to his own conversation. 

‘Just wait a second,’ Jamie told her at the bottom of the few steps to the stage. He disappeared for a moment, then returned with a chair. He helped her to get up the steps and pulled over a black equipment box that she could put her foot on. 

She thanked him and said sorry for being an inconvenience yet again. He shook his head and squeezed her shoulder as he turned to go. ‘If you need anything, let us know. Not necessarily the guys during the show, but I’ll let everyone else know to keep an eye on you.’ 

She nodded. Soon after a band she’d never heard of took the stage. She hadn’t known of The 1975 a few days ago, a band with a number one record. It seemed fair enough that she didn’t know the smaller band supporting them. 

A hand on her shoulder startled her. She expected for it to be Gus but it was Matty. 

‘Thought you might like to finish up your glass of wine. And I brought you some water,’ he shouted over the music, ‘so you have decided not to date anyone, while your friend chats up girls all the time? Did you not say he had someone over the other day? He’s currently…’ 

She smiled, ‘I know that he’s talking to some pretty girl. It’s fine. He does random hook ups. I don’t. It’s not my thing at all.’ 

He rolled his eyes. ‘You are insufferable.’ 

‘Just trying to keep my friend around,’ she replied. 

He gestured that he needed to get back and she nodded. The support band was alright. The crowd was cheerful. It would have been a lot better had she been able to actually be in the crowd. That was always the best spot to watch. 

Once they finished up their set, the light went back up and a lot of people were suddenly scrambling about. She felt very out of place and glanced around unsure. Gus was still nowhere to be seen. 

Ross and Adam were currently checking their in-ears, Matty was chatting to Jamie by the door and she noticed that he’d changed into a black t-shirt and lost the denim shirt he had worn before. 

Eventually, George joined his mates and they stood chatting for a bit until the lights went out again. 

They passed her. George took a seat behind his drum kit and Adam and Ross picked up their respective instruments. The stage lights bathed them in green. Matty grabbed the microphone in front of him and closed his eyes. The moment Matty started to sing, gave her goosebumps. It was in fact much better than she’d expected. 

For the first two lines, he kept his eyes closed, bopping along to the beat. It was almost an impossible thought but for a second, he looked absolutely unsure of himself. 

He ran a hand through his hair and turned his head in her direction. She wasn’t sure if he could see her sitting on Ross’ other side, but she smiled at him anyway. Yeah, he’d probably seen her because he was smiling now too, looking out into the crowd. 

Sophie took her time to study all of them for a bit. Adam on the opposite side of the stage was very much lost in his guitar playing, sometimes gazing up into the audience, or smiling at Matty, but most of the time he was strumming his guitar, head down with his body moving along to the beat George kept setting. 

George’s job looked like actual work. His forehead was constantly furrowed and she guessed that it was probably a mixture of concentration and effort. On top of keeping the beat, he actually did sing the backing vocals to Matty’s lead. She watched, fascinated. What she also discovered was that they all had tattoos, and quite a number of them. She’d spotted the piece on Matty’s chest the night before. But George’s arm was covered in ink and Adam sported at least one as well, as far as she could tell. 

Ross was standing closest to her, plugging the stings of his bass and occasionally stepping up to the mic to back Matty up as well. He’d sometimes retreat back towards George, exchange looks with him or Matty. 

The song ended and Matty went to grab his guitar at last. The song was another upbeat number and she briefly wondered if she’d ever asked them about a genre. As the chorus hit, she couldn’t help but stare. Between lyrics, the boys would just go wild on their instruments. She was transfixed but Matty’s stage presence. He wasn’t exactly shy off stage and somehow always the centre of attention because he did have an opinion on everything. 

But right there - he was so concentrated on what he was doing, he wasn’t asking for attention. And yet, he had captured hers easily. Had this been a different setting, a regular concert, she would have probably been crushing on the band’s handsome lead singer. But as she knew how he was when he wasn’t on stage, she wasn’t just crushing. Sophie was falling for Matty, hard. 

An arm slid around her shoulder and she looked up to see Gus had decided to join her to watch the show at last. She found it hard not to scowl at him. They’d been invited to the show and Gus had been the one overly excited to see the band play. And yet, that night he couldn’t have cared less. It was good the music was loud because otherwise she might have said something about it. Gus sat down on the floor next to her, crossing his legs and leaning his head against her thigh. As songs were changing again, Ross looked over and Gus gave him a thumbs up. 

Matty had found his footing at last and was chatting to the audience between songs. He was charming with his words but also very humble in thanking people for coming to their shows and supporting them throughout the years. No matter which song they played, she found it hard to pick her favourite. 

‘This is a lovesong,’ Matty said over the eerie sounds already playing. George’s drums kicked in and she wondered how a slower song would suit them. The mood inside the venue changed. The mood on stage changed. Matty’s voice broke on a couple of words and his face spoke of emotional pain that was still eating at him. She watched enthralled. When he belted out ‘now everybody’s dead’, it tore right through her. The force of his voice actually made her get up and move to the left a little, so that she could look past Ross and see the rest of Matty’s performance. She absent-mindedly clutched her right hand to her heart, staring at the lad. 

When the song fizzled out and Matty muttered a hoarse ‘Thank you very much’ into the microphone. Ross stepped over while uncapping a bottle of water. ‘So how do you like it?’ 

She laughed and opened her mouth to say something. ‘I - good,’ she started and shook her head, ’Sorry. I’m at a loss for words really.’

He grinned and put the bottle of water down, so he wouldn’t miss his cue. She sat back down on her chair and watched on. Gus gave her a knowing look but in that moment, she couldn’t care less. 

They played some more songs before Matty announced their final song. She looked at Gus. ‘What about that one song I didn’t get right?’ 

He laughed. ‘I guess they’ll do it as an encore.’ 

She nodded and listened to the last one. It was brash and about sex and it did give her all sorts of funny ideas. From the look of things, she wasn’t the only girl who’d caught onto how attractive Matty actually was. The majority of the crowd were girls of all ages. There were guys, yes, but only a fair few. 

As the last notes rang out and the light went down, the guys came rushing off stage. They were clapping each other’s backs, cheering. 

‘It’s not over yet,’ Adam told the two of them, as he went past them. 

Jamie handed them all towels and some more bottles of water. Matty was chatting excited to Ross before wiping his face with the towel and ruffing up his hair. He caught her watching and winked at her. 

‘You guys ready?’ Jamie asked eventually. 

They all nodded. The lights on stage dimmer completely. 

Matty was the first to hurry up the steps again. ‘This one’s for you then,’ he said, turning to her. 

She leant back, shaking her head, ‘Wha..?’ 

But she caught on to it as soon they started playing the song. She’d since learnt it was called ‘Chocolate’ and very dear to all of them. 

‘I wish I could dance!’ she called out to Gus over the music. He grinned sheepishly at her, mouthing ‘I’m sorry’. 

Matty was laughing happily as the audience sang his lyrics back at him. He stepped back from the microphone and turned to look at Adam, scaling his head in what must have been disbelief about that moment. 

Before they started playing the last song, he addressed the crowd again, thanking them for coming out, for buying their record. And he promised that they’d be back, bigger and better. Well, what she’d learnt in the short span of time she’d spent with them, it was probably going to happen just like that. 

This last performance stunned her again. The boys were all into it, heads hanging low over their instruments, when singing wasn’t required. The final minute of the song, when the last chorus had been sung, they three of them stumbled across stage, shredding the strings. Matty climbed on top of George’s drum kit, playing from there until George hit the drums for the last time. He’d been flicking his hair back and forth so often, she wondered if he’d ever experienced whiplash from it. Matty jumped down and she noticed that she’d truly been holding her breath. 

‘I told you to quit doing that,’ Jamie chided Matty, who only laughed and made his way down from stage towards the door. They were laughing and talking excitedly. 

‘You’re coming back there with us, right?’ Ross asked, as he went past Gus and her. 

Gus nodded, ‘Sure, we are. We’ll see you in a bit.’ 

She sunk back into her chair. ‘This was so good.’ 

‘Yeah, I knew this would be good,’ Gus said, ‘You should listen to me more often.’ 

Sophie laughed. ‘Yeah, once in a while it won’t hurt.’ 

Gus helped her to her feet and let her throw an arm over his shoulder, supporting her as he led her backstage. They were halfway down the corridor when the girl Gus had been talking to appeared again. 

‘I’ll find you in a minute, Vic,’ he said and continued walking with Sophie. 

‘Did you think about leaving with her?’ Sophie asked softly. 

‘I - no. We need to get your ankle looked at. And by the time we’re back from the hospital, it’ll be way too late to… pick up,’ he explained, ‘and I can’t really leave you in a state like that.’ 

They passed a door. 

‘Wait, wait, come here,’ it was Matty’s voice. Gus turned them around. 

It was their dressing room. Matty pulled it open for them to come in. George was just about to lose his trousers but stopped. Ross was sprawled out on a sofa and Adam was opening a bottle of beer. Matty slipped out of his t-shirt and she desperately tried to look anywhere but at him. 

She shifted on her good foot and Gus pulled over a chair. When she had sat down, that girl, Vic, appeared in the doorway again. Gus looked at Vic, then at Sophie, then around the room. 

Sophie sighed. ‘Now go. I’ll cope. I’ll be fine. Just maybe check your phone once in a while.’ 

‘I can’t just leave you - ‘ Gus protested. 

‘You can, now go. I’ll see you later or in the morning,’ she said, ‘Honestly. You know me.’ 

‘Yeah, that’s why I am worried,’ Gus laughed nervously. 

‘Go. I’ll get around,’ she said again, reaching up to kiss his cheek and pushing him towards the door. 

He looked around the room. ‘I - thank you for the invitation. It was… it was an amazing show. I guess I’ll see you some time when you come by the restaurant? Don’t be strangers.’ 

The guys all came over to say goodbye.

He took one last long look at Sophie but she waved him off. 

‘You are a phenomenal friend,’ George said, ‘and no offense, but he’s a shit friend.’ 

Sophie laughed. ‘Considering he’s still secretly hoping that he and I’ll be a thing at one point in the future, the least I can do is not to cockblock him. So. That’s that. I just hope he’s not taking her back to our hotel.’ She cringed at the thought. 

They all laughed at that. 

‘Can I get you some more ice for that foot?’ Adam offered. 

‘Nah, just leave it be. I just wanted to say thank you for the invitation as well and then get a car to the A&E. My ankle is killing me to be honest,’ Sophie admitted. She stretched her leg out a little and looked at it. It hurt and it looked horrendous. 

‘Not before you told us what you thought about the music,’ Matty said, ‘so, you’ll have some ice and a drink.’ 

She sighed. There was no point in arguing about that. It might just as well have been the last time she’d speak to them in a while. Adam disappeared and George asked her what she wanted to drink. 

‘Just some water, honestly. Can’t show up at the hospital drunk.’ He handed her a fresh bottle from the fridge and tossed one over to Ross who was holding out a hand for a bottle himself. Adam came back and handed her another bag of ice. She pulled up her leg as best as she could and winced as the cold hit her skin. 

‘Come on now, what’s the verdict?’ George asked. 

She broke into a smile. ‘I knew you would be good because an album doesn’t pop to number one just like that. And I expected to have a good time, considering you’ve been excellent company. But you meant fucking business out there. And you, you, George, you were a beast out there on the drums!’ 

George tipped his head in thanks and lit up a cigarette. 

‘Which one was your favourite then?’ Adam asked. 

‘You know that I don’t know any of the song titles. And it doesn’t really matter. I thought the lyric writing on all of them was a bit brilliant,’ she explained, ‘I did like - no. Actually, I could tell you what I liked best about each song rather than just picking out one.’

‘Blatant flattery!’ Ross called out jokingly. 

‘I loved how I could pick out each of you playing your bits. If you took any of that away, it wouldn’t have been right. I’m just honest. I’ve seen my fair share of bands. You just know when people love what they do or when they just do it for the money. I went to that one festival a while back and the headliner - well, people were there to hear that one song they knew from the radio. And the band was so pissed off and didn’t put any effort into it. I had tickets to see them some days later and hoped that they’d just had a bad day, you know. Because I guess it gets frustrating and not everyone can pull a Radiohead. But the show was lacking passion and fun. Not necessarily talent. But I could have spent the money better. Just putting on their record and getting pissed in my parents’s garden would have been more fun. But these past two hours? Honestly, I wish the set had lasted longer.’ 

‘Well, you should come out to any future show you like. We’ll have you on the list,’ Ross promised. 

‘I thought you were done with touring?’ 

‘Yeah, for a bit. We’re actually headed out to America in a little while. Just up until Christmas,’ George said, ‘If you happen to be about…’ 

‘Good one - no. I have no leave days left for this year,’ Sophie sighed, ‘it’s gonna be the run up to Christmas so soon, we’ll drown in work. But really, Gus and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Anyway. As much as I’d love to stay, it is time for me to go. It was lovely running into you.’ 

She got up and got her things. She tried hobbling towards the door, but George stopped her. 

‘Yeah, let me help you with that. You’re just going to make it worse when you keep putting weight on it!’ He scooped her up again and took her down the corridor again, the other guys all following along. She found herself out back of the venue eventually. Two security guards were loitering about smoking and George waved them over. 

‘Can you make sure she gets a car to the hospital?’ he asked, gently putting her down on the pavement. ‘Right, take care of yourself. Let us know how it goes’. He hugged her and then stepped away. 

Ross and Adam followed suit, and she thanked them again. 

When Matty stepped up to her, she blushed and was thankful that it was actually dark outside and their spot was only dimly lit. 

‘Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?’ He asked. 

She nodded, ‘Yeah, it’s alright. Honestly. I can actually survive without Gus by my side.’

‘If you need anything or get lost - let me know,’ he insisted, ‘and let me know when you get back to London, so we can meet up.’ Matty pulled her into a hug and when he released her, pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. 

She smiled and caught the other three exchange knowing looks. 

‘Bye,’ she said, turning to one of the security guards, who offered to support her walking. They slipped out of a gate and onto the street. There were quite a few fans waiting, who were entirely disappointed to spot her. She heard them mutter about her, wondering who she was and how she’d gotten there. 

A cab pulled up almost immediately and she got in, thanking the guy in the yellow jacket who handed her all her belongings. She told the driver to take her to the nearest A&E and only looked back at the venue once. 

Her phone buzzed in her purse and she got it out. Her face fell. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Very slowly, Matty walked them backwards until she could lean back into the car. Very intentionally, she ground her hips into him, to tease. 
> 
> ‘What are you doing?’ he mumbled, his lips brushing against her ear. 
> 
> ‘What do you mean?’ Sophie replied, kissing along his jaw. He pressed up against her. ‘Oh. Does it bother you?’ 
> 
> He snorted. ‘Don’t start anything we can’t finish off.’ 
> 
> ‘Who said I wasn’t going to finish you off?’ she purred into his ear. He swallowed hard and turned his face towards her. 
> 
> ‘You didn’t even know whether you’d want to go out with me last night, and now you’re being all cocky?’ 
> 
> Sophie shrugged. ‘It might not seem like it but I do know what I want. And what I enjoy.’ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I took all my notes and have re-written this thing.  
> In the original version of this, nothing was going to happen for a really long time... but even I was bored out of my mind reading back my chapters.
> 
> So... there you go. Sloppy kisses and lots of moans.

_‘Are you still at the venue? I’m coming back. That girl’s insane.’_

It would have been too good to be true had it been from Matty. She sighed. At least she wouldn’t have to wait around on her own. 

_‘Just getting to the hospital. Meet me there.’_  
She was lucky that it was a quiet night at the hospital and that a doctor saw her within 20 minutes of waiting once she’d filled in the paperwork. Gus was just rounding the corner to the waiting area when someone called out her name. She hobbled over, signing for Gus to wait for her. 

After some a physical examination that included some stretching and bending her ankle, she had to get x-rays, which only confirmed what the doctor suspected. She’d almost torn a ligament. There probably was no need for surgery, but she’d be suffering for quite a bit. They gave her a splint for support and some crutches for the first few days. She was supposed to take it easy, put her foot up for a while and only gradually try and put pressure on it. They handed her pain killers as well and that was that. 

With her shoe stuffed into her purse, and that purse slung around her shoulder, she made her way out to Gus. The crutches actually make walking a little easier and she didn’t feel quite as helpless anymore. Sophie let Gus buy her a bottle of water from the vending machines and swallowed two painkillers at once. 

‘Easy, don’t knock yourself out just yet!’ Gus said, laughing. 

‘I just want to get back to the hotel and crash,’ she told him, rubbing a hand across her face and wiping at her left eye. 

‘Or - do you want to go to their party?’ Gus suggested. He pulled out the pass Jamie had given him earlier. She rummaged through her purse and found her own. ‘I know you’d love to… talk to him a bit more.’

‘I - I’ve already said my goodbyes. Wouldn’t it be odd to be showing up?’ she wondered. 

‘Ask him,’ Gus said, making a grab for her phone. 

‘Ok, ok. I’ll ask him,’ she agreed, ‘but no more hitting on girls.’ 

Gus put up his hands. ‘I promise. Honestly.’ 

She asked him then, what had made him come back to her. ‘She tried to slip me some E while we were making out and I thought that was crossing quite some personal boundaries.’ 

‘I’m glad you made it out then,’ Sophie said, ‘the guys said I was an amazing friend for sending you away. And that you were quite an ass for leaving me.’

‘I know. I know,’ he said, ‘I need to thank them for taking care of you.’ 

_‘I fucked up a ligament. Got a lovely, stylish splint. And some crutches._  
_But Auguste has come to my rescue and is wondering whether he’s still welcome at the afterparty, although he ditched me._  
_They’ve given me some painkillers and I might make it for another hour._  
_You might be able to steal that dance after all. S’_

Matty was quick to thank her for the excellent news and let her know the address. 

**

  
The place was packed. They got in easy enough with their passes but getting away from the door to the bar seemed almost impossible. Gus tried to make room for her to hobble through and she only almost tripped twice over someone’s leg before grabbing on to the bar. Gus ordered a pint for himself and some more water for her. 

Her phone buzzed again. 

_‘Look up.’_

She put the phone back into her purse and raised her head. The wall behind the bar was made out of mirror glass. There were some shelves filled with bottles further down. She recognised some expensive spirits and some of her favourites. She glanced further up until she found Matty’s reflection in the mirror. She watched him for a second. He was fiddling with his phone. A spotlight bathed him in soft blue light. She marveled at how handsome he was. 

Sophie grabbed Gus’ arm and turned around, leaning her back against the bar. She pointed Matty out to Gus. 

There was a second open floor upstairs, complete with a bar, and he was leaning over the railing, clutching a glass of wine in one hand, while holding onto his phone with the other. Matty was back in the denim shirt from earlier, although he’d barely buttoned it up. The image of him shirtless in the dressing room flashed before her. Yes, it was definitely, continuously getting harder to not feel attracted to him. 

He grinned goofily down at her and she could tell he was at least tipsy, if not even on the brink of drunk. She scanned the room for the stairs leading to upper floor and he motioned for them to get up there, moving away from the railing himself. 

There was security at the bottom of the stairs, but Matty was quick to come down and call ‘They’re with us, just let them pass’ before sprinting up the again. 

Sophie took her time with the stairs because she still had to figure out how much she could actually use both her legs. Eventually, she reached the landing though. 

‘There you are!’ George called over from the bar, raising his beer in greeting. She giggled. While she had been seeking medical advise, everyone had gotten pissed. Excellent. Gus had dumped their shared belongings such as jackets and her purse on one of the free chairs by the wall and was already joining George and Ross at the bar. 

She looked around. The faces were familiar from far earlier that day, before the show. Friends and family. Jamie waved at her from the other side of the room, Adam smiled broadly when he saw her. He was chatting to a few people and had an arm around a pretty girl. 

Matty was standing at a high table with a few ladies, one of which might have been his mother if she remembered correctly. 

Sophie made her way over to the chairs and sat down. 

‘Santé!’ Gus called loudly and she saw how he and the lads downed a round of shots. That was definitely turning out to be an interesting night. Dealing with her injury and Gus drunk out of his mind would definitely be fun. Oh, and she dreaded the morning, when he’d be too hungover to get up. 

She stole a glance at Matty. He was still radiating off excitement, he used his entire body to talk. She could hear him laugh, she’d probably always be able to pick that laughter out in a crowd. 

‘And now come on, I want you to meet a new friend of ours!’ he said loudly and she was surprised to find him walking over to her. Sophie was about to get up, when he put a hand on her shoulder. 

‘By all means, stay put!’ he told her before introducing her to his mom as well as George’s mother and one of the older sisters. She shook hands with them and they asked about her impaired condition. Matty excused himself to the bar to pick up some more ice for her and a drink.   
She watched as he tried to slip past his mates and Gus but failed. Gus made him down a shot as well. It was some clear liquid and not a lime and salt in sight, so she guessed it might be vodka. Matty cringed at the taste, pulling the funniest of faces. 

‘I hope you friend isn’t a lightweight,’ George’s sister laughed as she followed Sophie’s glance. 

‘He isn’t but he’s started mixing and that’s never good,’ she replied. 

Matty sauntered over with two glasses in hand and handed her one. 

She sniffed at it and eyed the golden liquid. 

‘Ginger Ale,’ he said, ‘you wouldn’t drink. It’s a bit fancier than water though.’ He clinked his glass against hers and took a sip. 

‘So is this a place you’d go to… before you know - fame hit?’ Sophie asked, gesturing at the ceiling with her hand. 

Matty shook his head. ‘Strictly speaking: We’re from Macclesfield, and not Manchester. It’s just easier saying Manchester, because people will actually know that. But no. No, we didn’t quite frequent these places. We just spent a lot of time driving around, and making music.’

He looked wistful talking about it. Sophie nodded. 

‘They were the talk of town,’ George’s mother interjected and then started telling a story about George and Matty when they were but teens. It made Matty’s ear go all red and the mothers laughing. Sophie laughed with them which earned her a glare from Matty. 

He let a hand run through his hair which actually didn’t help with keeping it out of his face. She acted on impulse, but Sophie raised her hand to tuck a stray strand back behind his ear. Matty froze for a second but then chased her wrist with hand, letting his fingers go around it and holding on to it as she let her hand drop back into her lap. His arm lay heavy again her thigh. 

‘Shall we save the boys from alcohol poisoning? What do you say, Mom?’ George’s sister asked her mother, linking arms with her and already moving away. 

Matty’s mother, Denise, caught on as well and said, ‘If you excuse me for a second?’ She motioned into the direction of the restrooms and disappeared too. 

His thumb kept stroking over her pulse point and she wondered if he’d noticed it quickening. It was a simple touch, but none she had expected. 

‘All we need now is a cheesy song to start playing, so you can drag me to the dance floor,’ she said, nervously, ‘like some soppy rom-com.’ 

‘I’ll do just that, if the right song comes on,’ Matty declared, ‘come on, we’re going out for a smoke.’

He let his hand slip from her wrist into her hand, pulling her up from her chair and handing her the crutches. There was a glass door at the far back which lead out onto the smallest balcony. She wasn’t sure they were supposed to be there but it was better than heading downstairs and going outside where a lot of people were just waiting to speak to Matty. 

He offered her a cigarette but she declined. ‘Honestly,I hardly ever have one. Just when it gets really, really stressful at work. But I’m good now.’ 

Matty shrugged and put one in his mouth. 

‘Do you like your job? You keep saying you spend so much time on it. But do you actually like it?’ 

‘It has its perks, it has its downsides. I can’t really imagine doing anything else with anyone else. I have an amazing team and I get to work with my best friend. What’s not to like? Why, you thinking of a career change?’ She replied. 

Matty shrugged. ‘Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to not go down this path. And sometimes, it’s a lot. Those kids, because half the time they are kids, look up at us and we’re all not exactly saints and it’s really hard not to… let them down.’ 

‘Don’t you think that’s why they look up to you? Because you get to do what you like, the way you like it?’ Sophie said, ‘You’d be a bit boring, if you were a saint.’ 

‘Thank you,’ he muttered, ‘If you hadn’t met Gus, do you think you’d still be here now?’ 

‘Man, you’re asking some… deep questions tonight,’ she sighed, ‘I’d probably finished my studies. And would now be jobless or dying of boredom in some newspaper morgue.’ 

‘So, what did you do?’ 

‘History. Because I’m a geek. I loved it but… the promise of a career and amazing pay was just too tempting. Loved Ancient History. I should probably take more time traveling and visiting all the ancient sites.’ She was fairly sure the excitement showed in her eyes. 

‘A pretty geek, though,’ Matty said, sliding his upper body across the wall he was leaning on, right into her personal space. 

Sophie smirked and rolled her eyes. ‘What? Are you making a move on me now?’ 

‘I have been,’ he started, pushing himself away from the wall to stand before her, ‘doing exactly that since our first run in yesterday morning.’ He was only a little taller than her and when he lowered his head, he could speak directly into her ear. ‘Is it working then?’

She pulled away a little, just so she could look at him. ‘Don’t do that,’ she begged feebly, ‘I’m flattered but… I told you things are complicated.’ 

‘So, you don’t want me to kiss you?’ he asked, his gaze flickering between her lips and her eyes. She wanted to shake her head and tell him no, because it was what she normally did, what she was used to. But she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Sophie’s hand came up to rest on his shoulder, drawing him into her again. His cologne mixed with the cigarette he’d just smoked and the scent fogged up her head. An arm slid around her waist, pulling her into his body. She leant up and into him, tilting her head to meet his lips in the kiss they’d been more or less bickering about. 

His free hand came around her neck, keeping her in close vicinity as he pulled away after a couple of seconds. She didn’t open her eyes but he huffed and she was fairly sure he was smirking to himself. Sophie took an unsteady breath. Before she could say anything that would have probably killed the mood, he pecked her lips once, twice and a third time, before nosing along her cheek and muttering ‘See, wasn’t so bad, eh?’ into her ear. 

Matty ran a hand through her open hair and she went limp in his arms. She let her cheek fall against his collarbone and he turned his head to kiss the crown of her head. It was an intimate gesture. One she herself saved for her close friends, and actually only Gus, when he needed comforting. 

‘We shouldn’t - ‘, she mumbled. 

‘Oh, we absolutely should,’ Matty laughed and caught her lips in a kiss again. 

It was lovely to be handled with so much care. Previous first kisses had been an awkward mesh of hands and lips and teeth, but this here, secluded in their little corner outside, far from it. It was ridiculously romantic even.   
‘I’m pretty old-fashioned. I usually don’t kiss on the first date,’ she muttered into the warm skin just below his collarbone, when she buried her face against him again. 

‘Good thing this isn’t a date,’ he replied, ‘inviting you to our show and calling it a date would be pretty lame.’ 

She laughed at that. ‘I’ve had worse dates. Not recently, but… some were really boring.’ 

‘I can’t imagine that any activity in your company would be boring.’ 

She hit him in the chest lightly and pulled away. ‘Enough with the flattery already.’ 

Matty lit up another cigarette and blew the smoke out into the space between them. She curled up her nose at it, but didn’t complain. He noticed though and the next time, turned his head to the side. 

‘Are you going to tell him?’ 

She shrugged. ‘He’s not telling me about all the girls he’s meeting, I bet. I don’t know. It’s not like we give each other detailed accounts of our encounters. Not that I had have anything to share recently. I kind of don’t want to tell him yet. We might lose touch after tonight, what with both of us being busy. And then I’d have put a damper on his mood - I know it’ll do just that, even of he’ll pretend it won’t - for nothing.’ 

‘Not so sure we’ll be losing touch. I told you I’d be inviting you over. Do you not trust my word?’ Matty asked, looking at her with his head cocked to the side. She studied his face; his forehead was creased in question, his brows furrowed. There was a playful twinkle in his eyes which betrayed the seriousness in his question. 

Her eyes fell down to his lips again. Oh, she definitely wanted more of those. 

‘I know it makes me sound prudish. People our age just go out and about and date, and date multiple people at a time - and I’m making a big deal out of this. I’m silly. I’m being silly, right?’ she rambled, absentmindedly scratching her arm. 

He shook his head and smiled sympathetically. Some of his hair fell forward, a strand hanging over his eyes. Sophie’s hands itched to reach out and tuck it away, let her hand caress down the side of his neck, pull him into her again. But he stepped back, leaned against the wall again and pulled a leg up. 

She knew that what she said next would decide over whether she had a chance of seeing him again or if this night was just going to become a lovely little anecdote for when his band became insanely famous. 

‘You do realise that you’re getting my hopes up now? And I will tell him, in case you break my heart… and he will come after you, right?’ Sophie said to lighten the mood, ‘I’d very much like to see you again. I just - look, in case we figure out that what transpired here was just a happy coincidence of two people fancying a snog, and we figure out we’re much better off as friends, then it would be… kind of hard to explain why you got a chance and he didn’t.’ She took a step backwards and pointed over to the bar where Gus was involved an animated conversation with Ross and Jamie. 

‘I get it. You’ll give it a bit of time. It’s fine with me. But don’t be disappointed when I’m just giving you a hug by the time we say goodbye tonight,’ Matty warned, ‘come here again for a second.’ 

He reached for her arm and gently tugged her towards him, careful not to make her stumble with her hurt ankle. Sophie knew what he was after and tilted her head up to him, letting him steal another kiss. 

They giggled when he pulled away and harrumphed. When they stepped apart, she motioned inside, a silent question whether they were going to return to their friends. 

He held the door for her and she hobbled inside. 

Gus was a drunken mess by then and Sophie didn’t know whether to laugh or feel embarrassed. It had been a while since they’d last had a night out, so she decided to just go with it and laugh when he threw an arm around her and announced he had a stellar idea that she couldn’t say no to. 

‘Ross and I -‘, Gus began, looping his other arm around Ross’ shoulder, ‘have had a thorough discussion about the match the other day. And we need to find out who’s right. And it’ll only work if we try it out. And where else would we be able to try than on the vast grounds of Gram’s house?’ 

Sophie shook her head. ‘And you’re saying that..?’ 

‘I’ve invited them to come up to the house for a few days,’ Gus said with the biggest grin on his face, ’Ross is coming and George’s girlfriend is out of town. Adam will talk to his miss.’ 

‘Right. So - no offense to anyone - but you’ve just gone and invited people who just met to come and live with us for some days?’ Sophie summed up. 

‘Oh come on - you like them,’ Gus cried out, ‘what about you?’ He turned to Matty. Matty looked at Ross and shrugged. 

‘I suppose if everyone’s agreed, I’ll come with them?’ He replied. 

Gus lifted his arm off Sophie’s shoulder and high-fived Matty. ‘See, he’s coming, too. I bet that’s gonna change your mind.’ 

Sophie looked at Jamie and mouthed ‘I’m so sorry’, before slipping an arm around Gus’ waist. ‘Mate, you need to have some water. And then I suggest we go home. In case you forgot - I can’t actually drive with the splint and we still need to actually get to Whitby tomorrow.’ 

He nuzzled her neck, letting go off Ross. ‘That’s why you’re my best friend. Always taking care.’ 

Sophie managed to make him sit on a barstool and ordered some water for him, then turned around again. ‘I’m so sorry about this. Really. And please - don’t feel obliged to follow up on his invitation. With any luck, he won’t even remember it tomorrow.’ 

‘Oh, we definitely have to test our theory though!’ Ross protested and she realised he was at least fairly drunk as well. 

Matty patted his shoulder. ‘Yeah, we’ll talk about it tomorrow.’ Matty looked at her and they both laughed about their friends. Gus hung slumped about the bar and Sophie decided it was definitely for the best that she took him back to the hotel before he fell asleep on the spot. 

‘Okay, come on, Gus,’ she said, pushing him into a sitting position, ‘can you actually walk?’ 

He nodded, got up and stumbled into her. She almost toppled over, and it was only Jamie who stopped them from falling. 

‘I’ll help you get out,’ he told her, grabbing Gus by the shoulders from behind and steering him towards the staircase. She attempted a hug with Ross, who was a giggling mess who now clung to Matty’s side. 

Jamie had reached the stairs with Gus and she signaled she was coming. ‘I’ll - I’ll see you around, I guess.’ 

Matty nodded. ‘Let me know you get back safe.’ 

He dropped Ross onto the barstool Gus had left a mere minute ago and pulled her into a hug. With his face buried in her hair, he muttered, ‘I’d much rather kissed you.’ 

Sophie shot him a smile as she pulled away. ‘I know. Me too.’ She gathered her things and set off to follow Jamie. He was already halfway down the stairs with Gus, carefully pushing her drunk friend through the people downstairs. 

The night air didn’t hit her quite as hard as Gus. He gasped, gagged and muttered, ‘I’m going to be sick.’ Gus sat down on the curb, letting his head hang low between his knees. He heaved and she sighed. 

‘I’m going to get him some more water,’ Jamie said, pointing inside over his shoulder. 

‘Nah, we’ll be ok. You’ve done so much already. I’ll take it from here,’ Sophie said, ‘thank you, for dinner last night. And thank you for letting us watch the show.’ 

She gave him a quick hug before he went back. 

‘Are you going to throw up now, or will you be good to get in a cab?’ She stood beside her friend and looked down. Gus leant his head against her leg. 

‘Just wanna sleep,’ he mumbled into the fabric of her jeans. 

‘Yeah, I know,’ Sophie sighed again. Luckily, a cab pulled over and she managed to get Gus in without too much hassle. His head rolled to her shoulder and he was out like a light in a second. 

It was easier to navigate Gus around the corridors of their hotel because there was barely anything to trip over and he could trail along the walls. His state amused Sophie to no end, but she also knew the next morning would be hell for both of them. 

Once she’d tucked him in, a bottle of water on the night stand, she got ready for bed herself. Whilst taking off her make up, she perched on the edge of the tub, tapping a message to Matty with one hand. 

_‘Got in safe._  
_Gus is out like a light and probably will be for the next ten hours._  
_Sleep tight whenever you get into bed. S.’_

She didn’t think there was going to be a reply but she got one in less than a minute. She admired how he didn’t have any qualms about what he was saying when she took her time, carefully weighing her words. 

_‘In the car home._  
_Can I pick you up for coffee tomorrow? Doesn’t sound like you are leaving anytime soon. M.’_

She gasped. She could probably pull it off while Gus slept off his hangover. 

_‘Is 10 too early for you? S.’_

**

It was a bit of a risky affair, setting her alarm and hoping for Gus to sleep right through it.   
She tried to mute the sound in an instant. 

Gus stirred all the same. ‘Do I have to get up?’ He groaned, burying s his face deep into the pillow. 

‘No, no. Get back to sleep. You still got time,’ she said, running a hand through his hair and silently slipping from under the duvet. 

She locked herself into the bathroom and got presentable. Her foot was still a bruised mess and she had to pop some pills to make the pain bearable. Sophie was hoping that Matty wouldn’t take her too far. Walking on crutches was still hard work to her. The muscles in her arms were already sore from the night before, although she hadn’t been moving about that much. 

With only some minutes to spare she sat down on the edge of the bed, shaking Gus awake again. 

‘I’m going out to find breakfast. I guess you’re not up for it, right? I’ll let you sleep for a little while longer. Call me if you need anything,’ she muttered. 

He nodded and pulled the duvet over his head, groaning loudly. ‘I’m never, never drinking again.’ 

Sophie laughed. She didn’t hear that one for the first time and she was sure it wouldn’t be the last time. 

She checked herself over in mirror of the lift. She’d pulled her hair back in a ponytail and put on some lipstick to distract from the dark circles under her eyes. Gus had been up twice, throwing up in the bathroom and she’d sat with him and rubbed his back. 

Matty was sitting outside on the stairs to the hotel. Cigarette smoke was billowing over his head and two paper cups were standing next to him. She took a second to take the sight in, how his arms rested on his knees and how his hair curled over the collar of his leatherjacket. 

She fake-coughed and stepped to his side. 

‘Hey,’ he said, grinding the cigarette out under his shoe. He got up and kissed her cheek, right by the edge of her mouth. 

‘Did you sleep well?’ 

‘It’s always odd sleeping at your mother’s house, isn’t it?’ he replied, ‘you?’ 

‘Gus kept me up for a bit. I’ll have plenty of time to catch up on sleep those next few days though, so…’ she said, ‘I’ve got to warn you. I can’t be walking about too much with this.’ She lifted her leg up a bit. 

He nodded and pointed over to a black car, which had definitely seen better days. ‘Which is why I’m taking you for a ride. Show you what we do around here to kill time.’ 

Sophie nodded. ‘You’re not some crazy axe murderer who’s going to hide my body in the woods, right?’ 

He laughed out loud and stooped down to pick up the two cups. ‘Don’t think axe murderers would be bringing coffee. I forgot to ask how you take yours, so you’ll just have to drink it like me.’ 

‘One can never be sure,’ she laughed, bumping her shoulder into his. ‘I’ll take that coffee once we’re in the car, okay?’ She waved about with the crutches. 

‘Trust me, if I had any… dark secrets the fanbase would have unearthed them. I’d say you’re pretty safe with me.’ Matty mused. He opened the door for her, handed her the coffee and took the crutches to put them in the boot of the car. 

She buckled up the seatbelt and looked at him. ‘You are a good driver, right?’ 

‘Haven’t crashed so far. I’ll try and return you to Gus in one piece. Interesting choice of shoes, by the way. I take these are his.’   
She nodded. She’d had to be creative with her shoes. The splint wouldn’t fit into any of hers, so she’d opted Gus’ much larger trainers. 

‘I have a pair of wellies in the car but I couldn’t be bothered to retrieve them,’ she explained, taking a sip of the hot beverage, ‘but what you were saying about the fanbase. Is that not unsettling? I mean - you said it was overwhelming sometimes. But do people dig around in your past?’

Matty nodded, then checked the rear mirror and pulled out into the traffic. 

‘They do. It’s equally terrific and terrifying what they come up with. Most of them mean no harm. But when they start getting invested in every aspect of your life, it gets a little too much,’ he explained, ‘but I guess that’s how my life is now. I’m taking you far out today, so chances of anyone spotting us are low. Wouldn’t want to have those rumors trickle down to your friend.’

She furrowed her brows. ‘I’m sorry about… being that way.’ 

‘Look. The guys and I are really close. And what I see in your friendship with Gus is what I see in my friendship with G. Obviously, there’s another level to your closeness that we don’t have but you do end each other’s sentences and communicate non-verbally half the time, you know what I mean?’ Matty explained, fixing his eyes on the road ahead. ‘When I say that the guys are who I am loyal to and that the band is my priority, then you get it, right? You’re loyal to Gus and your job is your priority.’ 

She nodded. ‘I’m not sure where you’re going with it though.’ 

‘Just - some people, girls, I dated in the past… a lot of them didn’t get it. And that was why things didn’t go well. There are contracts and obligations and touring and dates sometimes.. don’t happen,’ he explained further. 

Sophie looked over at him. He seemed thoughtful, like he’d just remembered something. He scratched his cheek with one hand and then pushed some hair back from his face. Some got caught in the sleeve of his jacket though and fell forward again. She couldn’t help it. She reached out and brushed it back. Her fingers played with the longer strands pooling at the nape of his neck. The frown on his face vanished, his lips quirked into a smile and he hummed a little melody. 

‘Well, if you ever get sick of the limelight - I’ll give you a job,’ she tried to lighten the mood. 

‘And then you’d be my boss?’ 

‘Your supervisor, at least. I’d show you the ropes, it would be fun,’ she said. 

Matty quirked an eyebrow at her. ‘Well, I can think of fun stuff which involved ropes and you. But none of them have to do with work.’ He looked dead serious. 

It took a moment to sink in, but when Sophie caught up with what he’d said she blushed furiously. She opened her mouth to say something, then closed it again. He let her sit in silence for a moment longer, before he broke into a giggle. 

‘I was joking, Sophie. Just joking. Are you blushing?’ 

She turned her head to look out of the window. ‘I’m not blushing.’ 

‘Did I hit upon some hidden kink?’ he questioned, still giggling. 

Exasperatedly, she exclaimed, ‘God, no! Not that there’s anything wrong with kinks. Whatever give you pleasure, I guess.’ And a little quieter she added, ‘On second thought - I wouldn’t even know. Never trusted anyone enough to try.’

There was a long silence after that. 

She hadn’t paid much attention to where they were going - her best guess was south. They were on their way out of the city, houses on either side of the road became less. Matty fiddled with the radio. 

Sophie recognised the melody from one of her dad’s records and joined into the whistling towards the end. Matty whipped his head around. 

‘You know that song?’ 

She nodded. ‘It’s Otis Redding. Who doesn’t know Otis Redding?’ 

‘Oh, too many. Too many. How do you..?’

‘My dad. I got oddly fascinated with his record player when I was about eight. Sat in the living room, watching the needle glide over the vinyl. And I didn’t understand how they all looked the same but made different sounds,’ she explained, ‘Prince. I liked the Prince records best because my mother and I’d dance to them.’ 

They tossed artists’ name back and forth, and the other would nod appreciatively or shake their head. 

Eventually, he pulled away from the main road, and parked the car on the outskirts of a small patch of wood. Matty rolled the window on his side down, pulling out a packet of cigarettes. 

‘Do you mind?’ he asked. 

‘Not at all,’ she said. Sophie watched as he lit up the cigarette, how he took the first drag and blew out the smoke, ‘so, driving about and listening to music. That’s what went down here?’ 

He nodded. ‘Though we’d usually smoke something stronger than that. Still do, actually.’ 

‘By all means, help yourself.’ she told him. But he just shook his head. 

The music fizzled out and he started fiddling with the radio again. 

‘What do you say about this, then?’ he asked her, turning the music up a little. It was a lovely melody on the keyboard with a soft drumming beat. She waited for lyrics to be sung but that didn’t happen. Drums kicked in and she guessed that usually a chorus would have been sung over that part. 

She cocked her head to the side and squinted her eyes. ‘Are you having me on? Is that a song I should know?’ 

Matty turned the music down. ‘It’s something we’ve been working on. Something very… new.’ 

‘You’ve just put an album out.’ 

‘We never stop writing music though. So, what do you say?’ he wanted to know. 

She leaned back into her seat and stretched her legs, glancing at the ceiling. ‘Sultry. Very… I don’t wanna say catchy. But I guess it’s a song that people will recognise.’ 

‘Sultry?’

‘The sort of music I’d put on… to set the mood?’ Sophie clarified, with a wink. 

Matty didn’t reply. He pushed his door open and got out of the car, walking around the front. She opened the door on her side and turned in her seat, setting her feet out onto the gravel. With an extended hand, she waited for him to help her stand up. But instead, he crouched down. His knees rested against the door sill, bracketing her legs between them.

The fabric of his jeans was torn across his left knee, and Sophie put her hand over it.  
  
One of his arms came around her waist to pull her forward a little more and she had to reach out with her other hand to steady herself in his shoulder. Towering over him a little was a nice change. They smiled at each other for a second before she bent her head and chased after his lips for the kiss she desperately wanted. Matty shifted on his legs a little, eager to meet her mouth. His leg moved under her hand and it was now splayed across his thigh. She let the tips of her fingers dig into the material a little and his breath hitched. 

Sophie briefly wondered if he’d held back the night before on her account or because they’d been in public but this here was lot more wanton, and a lot more to her liking - lips, tongues, hands zealous to explore the other. 

She nipped at his bottom lip before leaning back to take a deep breath. She’d messed up his hair, and he looked positively debauched. 

Matty got up then, stretching. 

‘Was that what you had in mind then, when you said you’d pick me up for coffee?’ She teased. 

‘I did bring you coffee, I wasn’t lying,’ he said, ‘I was hoping we’d pick up there though.’ 

He kicked at a bit of gravel with his shoe. 

‘So, what are you going to do with your time off?’ She asked, getting to her feet as well. 

The sun was starting to peak through the clouds and she took a look at their surroundings. It was turning autumn. The leaves on the trees were turning into all the beautiful shades between yellow and green. A soft breeze was ruffling them up. Matty looked up into the sky, his neck stretching out as he leant his head back. His loose t-shirt rode up a little, revealing a sliver of light skin over the waistband of his jeans. She stared for a minute, wanting to stay in the moment forever. 

The silence which spread around them wasn’t awkward, it was comfortable. Two people were taking the time to breathe. 

Sophie approached him, her hands finding the hem of his t-shirt. She let her thumbs run over the skin on display before pushing her hands up over the soft cotton, clasping them behind his neck at last and pulling him in for another kiss. 

Very slowly, Matty walked them backwards until she could lean back into the car. Very intentionally, she ground her hips into him, to tease. 

‘What are you doing?’ he mumbled, his lips brushing against her ear. 

‘What do you mean?’ Sophie replied, kissing along his jaw. He pressed up against her. ‘Oh. Does it bother you?’ 

He snorted. ‘Don’t start anything we can’t finish off.’ 

‘Who said I wasn’t going to finish you off?’ she purred into his ear. He swallowed hard and turned his face towards her. 

‘You didn’t even know whether you’d want to go out with me last night, and now you’re being all cocky?’ 

Sophie shrugged. ‘It might not seem like it but I do know what I want. And what I enjoy.’ 

She held his gaze as she rubbed the denim over his crotch, tracing the outline of his cock before squeezing gently. 

He huffed out a ‘fuck’ and breathed hotly against her cheek. She did it again. He moaned. 

‘Can I,’ she started, her voice trembling a little. There was still the chance he might reject her offer. ‘Can I suck you off? Can I do that for you, would you like that?’ 

His laughter sounded a little desperate. ‘Would I like that - here?’ 

She pushed him back a little and threw the passenger door next to them shut, before stepping away and rounding the car. ‘Might take a little cover.’ Sophie pulled the back door open. He was still holding himself up with one hand on the roof of the car. 

‘I didn’t peg you to be the assertive type,’ he told her. 

‘Hmm. Pegging, shall I put that one the list, too?’ Sophie retorted. 

‘WHO are you? I made a lewd remark earlier and you got all flustered and now you’re standing there all smiles, talking about fucking me with a strap-on?’ Matty at least had the decency to blush this once. 

She laughed. ‘You might like it?’ 

‘What I’d like right now is for you to help a guy out here,’ he told her, pushing away from the car and coming around. He drew her into a kiss and her hands fumbled with the button of his jeans. Once it popped thought the hole, she pushed his jeans and pants down and steered him back, so he’d sit on the side of the backseat. Sophie got down on her knees and shifted around a little to not strain her ankle anymore before turning back to him. 

She felt a pang of self-consciousness as he watched her take his cock in hand. She leaned up and forward, poking her tongue out to meet the tip. He moaned, loudly, grabbing for the front seat to hold himself up. She led her lips slide down around him slowly, pulling up again even slower, before repeating the motion a couple of times a little faster. 

‘Fuck, Soph’, he muttered. It was the dark tone of his voice which made her skin tingle. She wondered if he’d mind it if she stripped off her trousers and climbed on top of him. The thought alone really turned her own. But she also liked to have something to look forward to, so sucked his cock back into her mouth, letting her tongue play over it. She did like the feeling it gave her - those few minutes she had all of the control. 

Matty had given in and had let himself backwards against the seat, lying there for her to ravish. She sped up her motions a little and he choked out, ‘Oh God, I’m almost - ‘. All the reason for her to pull away from him, just letting a finger stroke against the skin where his thigh met his hip. 

He breathed out loudly. 

‘Are you okay?’ she asked, not even attempting to hide the malicious joy in her voice. 

‘I’m perfectly fine. Just going a bit insane.’ 

Without warning she took him into his mouth again, letting her lips glide down a little further than before. One of his hands blindly reached for her. He almost poked her eye out with a finger, so she caught him, linking their fingers. Matty squeezed her hand hard on the next moan. She enjoyed the display in front of her. His back was arching up a little, his hair messed up against the seat. 

Sophie pulled away once more. 

‘Quit the… teasing. You’re going to… kill me,’ he muttered. 

‘Hmm. So demanding.’ 

‘You offered.’ 

She laughed, softly blowing over the wet tip of his cock. He jolted at that. 

But she took pity on him and continued eventually. He let the moans fall from his lips and only managed to stutter out, ‘Sophie, I’m…’ before he came. 

She appreciated that he tried to warn her - in reality, it had been her who had let him cum.

Matty raised his head a fraction and looked at her with hooded eyes. ‘You didn’t have to swallow.’ 

She shrugged and held a hand up, before leaning out of the car and spitting onto the gravel. ‘Didn’t swallow all of it. We didn’t want to ruin any of our clothes, right?’ 

He rubbed at his face. And laughed. She took one long look at him. His cock lay against his stomach, his t-shirt bunched up to his chest. He had his eyes closed, taking deep breaths in order to steady himself. 

She rose to her feet then, grabbed her purse from the front seat and tossed him a packet of tissues. 

He cleared his throat. ‘What about… you?’ 

‘What about me?’ Sophie replied. 

‘I want to return the… favour?’ He sat up eventually, reaching for her thigh. 

‘Hold that thought for another time. I think I’d enjoy myself even more if I got to take all of your clothes off first.’ Matty let his head fall forward, against her hip and she petted over his hair, ‘Rest assured I’ll think about it though, when I get into bed tonight.’ 

She didn’t hear what he said, but she could feel his lips moving against her. ‘What was that?’ 

‘Call me. When you’re thinking of me,’ he said. 

‘Hmm… do you want to hear me moan your name?’ 

‘Stop it, now. You’re wicked. And you are going to give me a heart attack.’ He said. Matty scrambled to his feet and straightened his appearance. He pulled his pants and trousers back up, ran a hand through his hair and leant down to kiss her. He could still probably taste himself on her tongue. 

‘Are you ready to go back?’ 

She nodded and went around the car again to sit back in the passenger seat. 

Before he got back in, he lit up a cigarette and took two quick drags before flicking it to the floor and squishing it out. When he’d started and turned the car, he reached over, leaving his hand rest on her knee. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A van was pulling up next to Gus’ car on the driveway and a very familiar car wasn’t too far behind. Her mouth fell open. 
> 
> ‘You wanker!’ She shouted over her shoulder and she could hear him laughing all the way from the kitchen. 
> 
> He came to stand next to her in the doorway, slipping his arm around her waist and kissing her temple. She just looked at him with her mouth hanging open.
> 
> George and Adam scrambled out of the van, waving over at them, and waited for Matty to park. Once he and Ross had gotten out of the car, they came over. She hadn’t forgotten about that talk at the party. But no one had mentioned it afterwards and she’d been fine with it. Still, she felt glad that they’d come up all the way after all. 
> 
> ‘Surprise!’ Gus said. She knocked a hand into his stomach, lightly, without any force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this just came together much faster than I thought. 
> 
> I'm becoming increasingly fond of poor Gus, and a lot annoyed with Sophie. :D

On the third morning of their retreat in Whitby, Gus slipped out of bed so early that she was left confused. 

‘I need to go and pick up some stuff from the shops. We didn’t get food yesterday,’ he explained and ducked out of the room. 

Sophie’s room was next door, actually, but Gus had dug out some of his grandmother’s old photo albums and they’d fallen asleep on his bed, over wine and him telling stories about his family.

She turned on her side and drifted off again until he shook her awake to tell her that he was leaving but had switched on the coffee machine for her. 

She smiled and muttered, ‘Thanks.’ 

Gus leant in to kiss her cheek, his lips lingering a little on her skin. 

  
She huffed into her pillow when he closed the door behind him. He hadn’t been strictly coming on to her these last few days but away from all the distractions, on holidays without his family this time around, he focused all his attention on her. He was almost able to read her mind now. 

Almost. 

There was one thing she managed to not give away: Matty. 

Gus hadn’t asked about him, hadn’t commented on him, nothing. He’d either figured it out and had decided to accept it, or he absolutely no clue. But she was sure latter was the case because Sophie was sure that he’d have asked her otherwise.

_‘Gus left for the shops._   
_Fell asleep late last night._   
_How are you enjoying home? S.’_

She sent the message off to Matty and put her phone back on the nightstand. They had been messaging back and forth. She’d tried calling Matty the night after their little outing but Gus had knocked on her door, asking if she was okay as he’d heard her talking. She had to cancel the call and sent a dozen of messages instead, apologising. 

Matty didn’t seem to mind too much, replying ‘the real thing is more fun anyway’ and proceeded to tell her about the trick he’d played on his younger brother. 

She’d been worried for nothing because conversation with him by text was still easy. 

Sophie got out of bed and under the shower eventually. They had nothing planned for the day. They never had. Gus and her usually ate breakfast, talked and then went about their separate ways. He stayed in the kitchen a lot, trying recipes and serving them to her throughout the day and she’d sit at the desk on the other end of the living room and study for a bit. When her back started hurting from sitting hunched over, she’d make a cup of tea for each of them and they sat out on the patio and listened to the sea lapping at the shores in the distance and watched the clouds move across the sky. Had she been fit for a walk, she’d have taken him for the longest walks. 

She made a mental note to suggest going into town later that day, just for a change of scenery. 

Neither Gus nor her had given much thought on what to bring to Whitby. It was the coast, bound to be windy, it was autumn. She had thrown a few jeans, t-shirts and cardigans into her bag. The weather turned out to play tricks on them though. The past two days had started out grey and miserable but then turned sunny and warm even. 

She pulled an oversized pullover on - one that ended had probably once belonged to Gus alone. But they weren’t sure. They’d started sharing a couple of things at one point. T-shirts, jumpers, jackets. She loved nicking his blazers, which were too large for her but made any jeans and t-shirt outfit look cooler. 

The jumper almost reached her knees and suggested she’d foregone trousers all together, when in reality she was wearing one of her running shorts. Well. That had been on her agenda - getting back into running. But it was entirely out of question for the next few weeks. 

She’d just settled at the desk with her first cup of coffee, wet hair hanging over her shoulders when she heard the car approaching. 

Gus soon enough pushed the front door open with his shoulder, arms full of bags. 

‘Would you mind helping me out? There’s still some stuff left in the car,’ he said, going through to the kitchen. 

She got up but looked after him. ‘Are you sure we need all of that? Doesn’t it seem a bit excessive?’ She slipped into her rubber boots which were still the only shoes she could really get into with the splint. Gus didn’t reply, so she turned to go outside and stopped dead. 

A van was pulling up next to Gus’ car on the driveway and a very familiar car wasn’t too far behind. Her mouth fell open. 

‘You wanker!’ She shouted over her shoulder and she could hear him laughing all the way from the kitchen. 

He came to stand next to her in the doorway, slipping his arm around her waist and kissing her temple. She just looked at him with her mouth hanging open.

George and Adam scrambled out of the van, waving over at them, and waited for Matty to park. Once he and Ross had gotten out of the car, they came over. She hadn’t forgotten about that talk at the party. But no one had mentioned it afterwards and she’d been fine with it. Still, she felt glad that they’d come up all the way after all. 

‘Surprise!’ Gus said. She knocked a hand into his stomach, lightly, without any force. 

‘If I’d known you were coming out, I’d have…’ she started, but George finished her sentence, ‘What? Dressed?’ 

She poked her tongue out at him. ‘I’ll have you know I’m wearing more than this,’ she replied, pulling the hem of the pullover up to show off the shorts. She knew at least two pairs of eyes were watching. She had a small tattoo on her right thigh which, for obvious reasons, was barely ever on show. 

Ross eventually came over to give her a hug and tell her that it was good to see her before following Gus inside. 

‘You all look well rested. That’s great,’ she observed. 

Adam followed up on embracing her with a huge smile before ducking into the house as well. 

She was a bit hesitant when Matty stepped up towards her. ‘You could have said something,’ she muttered into his ear, when he’d pulled her in. 

‘Your face was worth it,’ he replied, ‘I’m so glad to see you.’ 

Sophie could see George raise an eyebrow at their prolonged hug, so she was quick to gently push Matty away and usher him through the door. 

‘I hope we’re not imposing. It did seem like a mental idea when we’d sobered up,’ George told her as he hugged her. 

‘No. It’s absolute lovely to see you,’ she assured him, ‘I could get used to this. You’re an excellent hugger.’ 

She let him walk in before her. Sophie picked up her cup from the desk and followed everyone into the kitchen. It was the second largest room in the house. The windows faced out towards the sea, a giant kitchen island was the centre of the room. A huge dining table stood on the other side, on the brink of the spacious living room, establishing a border between the different rooms. 

‘This place is beautiful,’ Matty said, ‘and no one’s living here?’ 

Gus shook his head. ‘No. My parents had a lot of things fixed up since my grandmother died. The electrics were a joke, as was the heating. But none of us have wanted to move in so far.’ 

Sophie hoisted herself up on the kitchen island next to Gus. He was leaning against it and gripping onto the edge of it. She could see his knuckles go white. Talking about this house, his grandmother, and all the memories, was something he absolutely avoided. 

‘I’d never been here before,’ Sophie said, flinging her arm around Gus’ shoulder, ‘I only met Grams once. But this house is still full of her love and her spirit.’ 

Gus let go off the counter and reached for her other hand which was resting in her lap. She could feel the slight tremor as their fingers intertwined. The moment didn’t get lost on anyone. 

‘There’ just so much of her that I see in you. Don’t worry about memories getting lost. She’s always right with you.’ She hadn’t meant to reduce him to tears but he tried to surprise a sob, turned to kiss her temple and excused himself for a minute. 

The guys were shuffling their feet and looking uneasy. George looked at her and asked if someone should go after him, but Sophie shook her head. 

Ross cleared his throat. ‘You do realise that these displays of affection don’t exactly make it look less like you are in a relationship.’ 

She sighed. ‘I know.’ She let her eyes skim over to Matty who was worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. 

Gus had lit up a cigarette outside and was pacing the vast expanse of grass. 

‘This house is everything to him. And his dad and uncle have announce they’ll put it up on the market. No one can be bothered really to take turns in going up here except for Gus. They do it but… no one really cares. And they’re not willing to cover the costs for it anymore. Let’s just say some giant family drama is cooking up. His dad said they’d keep it if Gus quits his job and opens up a branch of their family business up here. Which is ridiculous. Can you see him as an estate agent?’ 

‘And if he bought it?’ George said. 

‘We’ve been… trying to figure things out. He’s been on his laptop trying to find ways to get a loan. We still have a couple of months left. He only told me last night. I think that’s the first time he actually said it out loud and acknowledged it. So… it just hit Gus like a ton of bricks. I do think we could get him a decent loan if I just transferred my savings to him and all. But he doesn’t want me to help out, not with money anyway.’ 

She craned her neck to see what Gus was doing. He’d stretched out on the grass, just blowing smoke into the air. 

‘Just give him a few minutes,’ she said, gliding down from the counter, ‘Come on. I’ll give you a tour.’ 

She walked around the dining table and spread her arms. ‘So. The living room, obviously. I’m sorry about the state of it. Had I known we’d have guests, I’d have put all the things away.’ She indicated the stacks of DVDs, books and CDs. 

‘Some classics, I see,’ Matty said, picking up some of the DVDs. ‘We approve.’ 

‘We can watch that one tonight, if you fancy,’ she suggested, ‘The nights around here aren’t particularly wild. I spent most of the time over there at the desk, studying. Uhm. Through there is the downstairs bathroom and a bedroom. Let me show you.’

Sophie walked ahead, switching on the light in the corridor. 

She opened one door to the left, which was leading into the refurbished bathroom. Daylight was still seeping in through a window, falling onto a claw-foot bathtub. Everything in there was new and shiny but still made to look classic and chic. 

‘We haven’t used this one so far, as we’ve been sleeping upstairs. But I guess if anyone wants a soak, there you go.’ 

The room on the other side of the corridor was the bedroom. Its windows were facing out towards the barn across the drive. The huge kingsize bed was stripped of covers. 

‘I’ll pick up some covers from the laundry room. I actually need to check whether we’ll have to chuck them into the washing machine first. But anyway. This is one of the bedrooms. We only have three, so I guess you’ll have to share.’ She said, running her hand over a chest of antique drawers. 

‘Oh, we’ve shared single beds on tour. I think we’ll be able to cope alright,’ Ross said. 

She pointed towards the last door in the corridor, saying it was the laundry room and pointed back to the living room. ‘We’ll have to take the stairs then.’ They retreated. Matty lingered behind a little, putting a hand on the small of her back as they walked back side by side. Oh, she wanted nothing more than to be wrapped into his arms. 

Sophie motioned to a smaller door next to the kitchen. ‘That’s the pantry. Help yourself to anything really. There’s a crate of wine there which I need for my course, that one’s off limits. But everything else - take whatever you need.’ 

They could hear the backdoor being opened and closed and then Gus came through. His eyes were still red from crying. 

‘I assume she’s filled you in on the general gist,’ he muttered, ‘Sorry about that. I’ve spent so much time here.’ 

‘No, no, we get it, mate,’ Matty said, clapping Gus on the back, ‘It’s an awful situation they put you in.’ 

Gus sighed and approached Sophie again, his arm automatically going around her waist. She didn’t miss the way Matty glared at Gus’ hand. It was actually quite flattering. 

Gus took over from her then, talking about the upstairs rooms and leading the way. 

‘Sophie dumped her stuff in here the other day, but I guess we’ll just move that over and then this room is almost good to go. Just needs a change of sheets,’ he said, picking up some of her belongings. 

‘You’re going to share then?’ Matty asked. 

‘Uhm, yeah. Id hate to make two of you sleep on the sofa, really,’ Gus said. 

‘I might take the sofa,’ Sophie said, trying to sound nonchalant. 

‘Don’t be daft.’ Gus replied, rolling his eyes. 

‘You do realise you snore, and hog the covers, right?’ She mocked him but it was actually something she considered. The thought of Gus spooning her and getting cozy, even if it was platonic, while Matty was in the house seemed a little odd. 

‘You hurt me,’ Gus replied, clutching a hand to his chest. 

He then led the lads over to his bedroom, pushing the door open and unravelling the chaos they’d left behind. The massive four poster bed was still unmade and the photo albums were strewn across the floor.

Sophie, still in the other room, stuffed her things into her travel bag and threw her jacket over her shoulder. 

Matty stepped back into the room.

‘Is there anywhere we might disappear to for a bit of privacy?’ he muttered. 

She shrugged. ‘The barn, I guess. Later. He’ll show you now.’ 

‘I’d really like to kiss you.’ he whispered, stepping even closer. She looked at him and nodded. 

‘I’d really like that. Later.’ 

Sophie brushed past him with her arms full of her things, squeezing past Adam and George and dumping everything onto a chair in the corner. 

‘Right, there’s one last thing I need to show you,’ Gus said. 

‘You mean where we can set up our gear?’ George asked. 

She looked at George, then at Gus, then stepped back. 

‘Just to clarify. I’m just guessing the lot of you have a secret group chat I know nothing about? Or how else did this come about?’ Sophie asked. 

Ross nodded. 

She tutted. ‘I feel left out.’ 

They wandered back downstairs, out of the front door and crossed the drive. The barn had once actually been a horse barn. Gus’ uncle had recently seen to it - the walls were now fully insulated, a heating system had been installed and some furniture made it more homely. It served as a lovely lounge. 

When Gus pulled the door open, Matty gasped. ‘Fuck me. This is perfect.’ 

‘I was hoping it wouldn’t disappoint. How about we unload your stuff, then have breakfast and then get you settled into the rooms?’ Gus suggested. 

They all nodded in agreement. 

‘I’ll pop inside and set the table then. Makes sense now that you insisted on me making two loafs instead of one,’ Sophie told Gus, shoving him a little. 

She picked up the last two shopping bags from Gus’ car and disappeared into the kitchen. Just as she was taking plates out of one of the high cupboards, someone crept up behind her. 

‘Sorry, couldn’t wait,’ Matty murmured into her hair as he grabbed her by the hips and then turned her around. 

She glanced over at the door and swatted at his hands. ‘What are you doing..?’ 

‘Stealing a kiss,’ he announced before leaning in. She let him, for a second before ducking away. 

‘What if someone comes in..?’ She said. 

‘I said I was going for a piss. They’re not suspecting anything,’ he calmed her. 

She nodded, stepped closer again and pecked his lips. ‘You just need to stop glaring at him whenever he’s getting touchy-feely. I can’t creep out from under his touch all the time, ok? You’re worse than him actually. It’s a bit cute but -‘ 

‘I get it. No reason to be jealous,’ Matty joked. 

‘None at all. Let’s just… take it easy, yeah?’ she pleaded, then smacked his ass. ‘Now leave before someone comes looking for you.’ 

He sauntered off, smiling at her over his shoulder and she marveled at the sight. He looked a bit mysterious, dressed in all black, hair flopping over to one side. 

How she’d managed to catch his attention was beyond her. 

  
The dining table could hold eight people, so there was actually enough room for her to leave the vase of flowers as the centerpiece. She knew no one expected an immaculately set table, but her professionalism wouldn’t let her be sloppy. 

She even managed to unearth napkins from a drawer. 

Sophie was just boiling the kettle when she could hear the guys’ voices approaching. 

‘What’s this?’ Adam asked, ‘Breakfast has never looked so good.’ 

‘Oh, just… we celebrate meals around here,’ she said, ‘who’s having coffee? Who’s down for a brew?’ 

Gus and her had a routine in the kitchen. He scrambled the eggs and fried bacon, she prepared the drinks. They didn’t get into each other’s way at all because they’d been practicing it for years. 

‘So you made the bread?’ George asked. 

‘Yeah, it’s kind of my thing,’ she agreed, ‘I’m just doing all the simple stuff. And he’s the perfectionist.’ She turned her head and nodded towards a shelf full of spices. Gus didn’t even look up, reaching out blindly for the shaker which read ‘cardamom’ and handed it over. 

In return, she handed over a fork to him which he used to try the eggs. Sophie watched over the milk like a hawk as it was sitting atop the stove in a pot to heat up. 

They didn’t even realise that their guests had fallen silent and were just observing what was going on. She picked up a fork herself, tried some of the egg. Gus squinted while she was fanning her mouth because it was piping hot. 

‘Chili,’ she muttered, ‘not too much though.’ She then picked a small cherry tomato from a bowl and popped it in her mouth. Eventually, she poured some of the cardamom into a mug, poured some coffee over it and held it out for Gus to try. 

His eyes widened. Then he nodded in approval. ‘That’s going to be a new staple for breakfast.’ 

‘I know, right? It’s not as sickly sweet as cinnamon but still makes it a lot smoother.’ 

Sophie picked up the bowl of small tomatoes and walked over to the table, looking a little embarrassed. ‘Sorry. Sorry. By all means - we didn’t mean to keep you waiting. Help yourselves.’ 

‘It’s alright,’ Adam said with a wave of his hand, ‘it’s actually fascinating to watch. It’s a lot like their friendship. I mean - we’re all close. But George and Matty might just as well be one person.’ 

Sophie looked at George, then Matty. He blew George a mock-kiss and George reached out to pat Matty’s hand. They all laughed. 

Gus put the large pan over into the table and they all helped themselves to food. 

The last two mornings had mostly been spent in silence. Yes, Gus and her had had breakfast together but they hadn’t felt the need to talk much. And that had been alright. It was rare that they didn’t have to rush anywhere and they’d just enjoyed keeping each other’s company in silence.   
  
It was entirely different now: a lot of laughter, a lot of talking over each other. The clattering of cutlery. She sat back for a moment and looked around the table. She was sitting with her back to the living room. George sat at the head of the table on her right side, holding onto his cup of coffee for dear life. Matty was across from her, his outstretched legs were brushing hers under the table. He was sitting next to Adam, who was wedged between Matty and Gus. 

Ross was sitting towards her right and filling her in on everything Gus had said the night of the party. 

‘How come you remember all of that and his recollection is but a blur?’ She joked. 

‘I think he was a bit ahead of me with the drinking,’ Ross replied. Gus was shooting daggers at them across the table.

  
After breakfast, they let the guys figure out who would be taking which room, although she had a feeling that who would we sharing with whom was a long-standing arrangement. 

Matty and George moved their bags into the downstairs bedroom, while Ross and Adam went up the stairs. Sophie fetched covers from the laundry room. No one had used any of the laundry in a while and she figured it would be best to air them out for a bit, so Gus helped her put them up on the washing line back out by the patio. 

‘I was thinking we could be going into town today,’ she told him, ‘I’ll ask them, if they wanna tag along. But I think a change of scenery would be nice.’ 

Gus shrugged, ‘That - or we could do that tomorrow. Just let them settle in. Have you seen their set up? I think they’d love to spend some time making music.’ 

‘Matty would like to spend some time making music,’ George’s voice said from behind the grey cover on the line. He stepped around it, squinting his eyes against the sunshine, ‘We’ll just go with whatever you have planned.’ 

‘Oh, we don’t have plans. It was just an idea I had this morning. But anyway. Is that how he is… always thinking about the next song?’ Sophie said. 

George shook his head, ‘Not all the time. But we’d better give him the opportunity to be able to try out an idea than have him moan about the lack of equipment. Thanks for letting is set up camp over there. This place is - amazing. It would be lovely to be able to sort out the next record in a… place like this.’ 

‘You’ve just put out a record,’ she exclaimed. 

George shrugged. ‘I know - I KNOW.’ It indicated that someone else was the driving force behind creating more. 

‘Well, you lot figure out what to do about today and I’ll get a head start on dinner prep,’ Gus said, picking up the basket of clothes-pegs. He disappeared into the kitchen through the glass door. 

George stepped away from the sheets and covers and pulled out his packet of cigarettes. ‘So, what about today?’ 

Sophie shrugged. ‘I know Gus and I are headed into town tomorrow as we have tickets to visit the Abbey. Considering he knew you were coming, I’m fairly sure he got you tickets too. So… we’re going over there tomorrow anyway. I dunno. All of you must have gotten up so early. I’d totally get it, if you’d prefer to just chill.’ 

When he had finished smoking, they went back inside as well. 

Matty was draped over one of the large armchairs, Adam was nowhere to be seen. Ross was talking to Gus in the kitchen. 

Sophie sat down on the large sofa which could be pulled out to be a bed. 

‘So, we were talking about how to spend the rest of the day,’ she started. Matty sat up straight. 

‘Gus mentioned there’s a bit of a secluded beach around here,’ Matty said, ‘about half an hour of a walk from here?’ He looked rather excited. 

She nodded. ‘Yeah, he told me about that one.’ 

‘We could just go for a walk there, soak up the sunshine and hope not to run into anyone?’ Matty said. 

‘Are we talking about the beach?’ Ross asked, leaning in the doorway to the kitchen. 

Matty nodded. 

‘Okay, so I guess that’s sorted?’ Gus called, ‘are you going to be okay on your own?’ 

‘I’m sorry to inform you but I can survive without you doting on me, all of the time,’ Sophie called. 

She leant back into the sofa and closed her eyes for a second. 

‘You’re not coming with us?’ There was a thud and as she opened her eyes, Matty was sitting next o her. 

She shook her head and raised her foot in reply. ‘Sorry, can’t be walking for that long. And it’s a bit of a climb down there, as far as I am told.’ 

He sat up straight. ‘You want me to stay here?’ She was pretty sure there was a slight wiggle to his eyebrows. 

She smiled. ‘I’ll be fine for an hour, honestly. I can take on of my mock exams, which is due this week anyway. And then I might just have a long hot soak. I think I’ve got a cold coming on from when we got drenched the other day.’   
Matty nodded, but stuck out his bottom lip in mock disappointment. 

George had wandered back into the kitchen as well, so she was sure no one would see, not behind the sofa anyway, how she grabbed Matty’s hand and gave it a squeeze. 

‘I’ll find you, later,’ she mumbled. He held her fingers in place for a moment longer and she loved their hands just fit together. 

‘How’s your foot doing anyway?’ he asked, louder. 

She filled him in how walking without the splint felt funny and that it hurt most when she was resting. Walking was okay with the splint but exhausted her quickly. 

  
**

As much as she loved her job, Sophie realized that silence was bliss. The clattering of dishes, clinking of glasses, someone angrily shouting behind the pass-through of the kitchen - she loved the noise. She really did. But the silence made her feel how draining the last couple months had been. 

She had a cup of tea resting on the window sill and balanced a book on the edge of the tub. The hot water had almost been scolding when she’d stepped in but it now made her feel relaxed and warm. 

Sophie wondered briefly how she’d gotten from busy London to here - she had a house full of lads, whom she hadn’t even known a week ago. It was funny that they’d be so trusting after those few days. Or maybe it wasn’t. She’d drifted in and out of friendships and teams due to changing jobs a lot. It had always been easy to connect with the right people. Maybe it was just the same with them. 

She picked up the cup from the window sill and let herself sink down into the water again. 

She was glad their ways had somehow crossed. Gus and her didn’t have that many friends left - their jobs made it hard to keep up with people who worked ‘regular hours’. When their friends weren’t slaving away behind their desks, Gus and her were working. There had been a lot of missed birthday parties, cancelled meals and meetings. It was truly nice to be hanging about with people who knew all about fucked up sleeping patterns, last minute plan changes and putting their jobs first. 

And then, the bathroom door flew open and Matty stumbled in. He was pulling his t-shirt over his head and obviously, hadn’t seen her. His head jerked around towards the tub though once he’d freed himself from the stained piece of clothing. She dropped the cub into the bathwater, a soft clunk filling the air as the porcelain hit the bottom of the tub. 

He stopped dead. 

‘Uhm,’ she spluttered, crossing her arms across her chest and pulling her knees up although she was sure the foam and bubbles were covering most of her body. 

‘I - ,’ he stuttered, pointing towards the door, then looking back at her. ‘I - .’ 

‘Sorry, I forgot to lock the door,’ she muttered.   
  
‘I’m sorry!’ he exclaimed.

Sophie reached for the large towel she’d put aside for herself and he turned around. 

‘Well, considering… I gave you head in a car, in public, this should be nothing to be embarrassed about,’ she said, getting up and out of the water. She wrapped the large towel around herself, hoping she could secure it enough for it not slip. Sophie eyed up his back. She was fairly sure her comment had made him blush. 

She could hear the front door open and voices filtering in. 

‘Ok, I’m decent. Would you… maybe close the door?’ she asked. He made two steps towards the door, closing it and turning the key in the lock, then he turned around. 

‘I tripped on a rock and cut myself,’ he said, twisting his left arm around, so he could take a look the damage done. 

She flinched. ‘Let me help.’ 

He nodded and stood still as she closed the gap between them. ‘Did you enjoy the walk then?’ 

‘Apart from falling, yes. The weather is odd. The wind is cold, when the sun is out, it’s roasting. And I’m really not good at small talk.’ He laughed softly. 

She reached for his wrist and pulled his arm up. ‘I think if we just clean off the blood and put a plaster on it, you’ll survive.’ 

He nodded and wandered over to sit on the edge of the tub. She grabbed a flannel from a clean stack on the corner shelf and went over to pull the plug on her bathwater. She watched the water trickle down the drain, very aware that Matty was staring at her. 

‘Words and actions don’t match, you know. You’ve just brought up our… little adventure and now you’re standing there, ignoring me staring at you,’ he muttered, ‘or are you playing coy, to have me on?’ 

‘Just because I enjoy you in various states of undress doesn’t mean that I feel super comfortable in the buff around you,’ she replied. She knelt down on the bathmat and turned on the tap. When the water was a little warm, she wet the flannel and reached out for his arm again. 

Matty flinched as she touched the fabric to his skin. It looked far worse than it was though. She rinsed the flannel once and softly wiped at his skin again. She had gotten a good glance at the tattoo on his hip before but now she could see the one on his chest and there were more on his arms. 

There was a loud knock at the door. 

‘Are you alright in there?’ It was Ross’ voice. 

‘Yeah, it’s all fine. Nurse Sophie says it’s a close call but I’ll make it,’ Matty shouted back, poking his tongue out at her. She rolled her eyes and dropped the wipe into the tub, then got up to her feed, almost tripping on her towel and only just managing to catch herself before pulling it off her body. 

‘Soph’s in there with you?’ That was Gus. He sounded surprised. 

‘Yeah, I was in the bath and forgot to lock the door. Couldn’t leave the poor guy bleeding to death though, right. Jamie would probably come after me,’ Sophie called. Both of them giggled like kids. She rummaged around the shelve, looking for something to bandage Matty up with.   
When she found what she was searching, she turned back to him. 

‘The flowers on your shoulder, do they mean anything?’ 

She knelt down again and opened the box in her hand. 

His finger came up to trace the outline of her tattoo, tracing along her shoulder blade. The tip of his finger was a bit rough and she knew it was due to his guitar playing.   
‘The zinnias?’ she asked, ‘They stand for loyalty. Gus got the same tattoo.’ She pulled his hand away from her skin so that she could put the plasters on. He had several small cuts along his arm. 

‘And the other one?’ 

She was back to her feet again. ‘Peace of mind.’ 

‘I’m pretty sure it didn’t say ‘peace of mind’,’ Matty protested. 

She had a feeling he wasn’t going to let go of it anyway, so she hitched up the towel. ‘It’s Greecian. Ataraxia. You can google the concept. Epicur. Pyrrho.’ 

She was just about let the towel drop down to its full length, when he reached out again. His finger ran along the fine writing. Goosebumps spread from there, over her leg, her stomach, her entire body. The finger lingered, then the palm of his hand rested against her thigh. 

‘We really shouldn’t be -‘, she started as his hand itched higher, sliding across her hip. 

Another loud knock on the door. ‘Do any of you want a brew?’ It was Ross again. 

‘Yeah, that’d be lovely. Matty made me spill mind when he came barging in.’ 

She picked up the box of plasters and put it back on the shelf, picked up the cup from tub and looked at him. 

‘Come on. No time for play now,’ she said, nodding her head towards the door. 

Matty nodded. He shifted his legs a little and sighed. 

She watched, amused. ‘Did it… are you..?’ 

‘Turned on?’ he completed her sentence, before pushing up to stand on his feet. He was already invading her personal space. ‘I’d be lying if I said no. How are you… so blasé about it?’ 

‘Blasé?’ she repeated. He nodded. ‘If you touched me now, you’d know that I’m anything but blasé.’ 

Matty raised and eyebrow at her but brought a hand up to her naked shoulder. She smirked and shook her head. ‘You do need to keep up, _Matthew._ ’ 

His eyes were searching hers and widened when he realised what she had meant. It made her laugh a little. 

Sophie turned away from him and strode over to the door. She turned the key in the lock and opened it wide. He stopped in front of her on his way out. 

‘Minx,’ he muttered under his breath. 

‘Are you alright?’ George called from the living room and it made them snap out of their little game. 

She closed the door behind him and sighed. Resisting him was much harder than she’d anticipated. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘Wait. Wait. I am going…,’ she muttered, ‘How about I went and… brought a date all by myself?’ 
> 
> Gus coughed. ‘And how are you… Silvie knows all of your friends - how?’ 
> 
> Sophie laughed and shrugged. She’d have to find someone Silvie hadn’t met yet and wouldn’t exactly expect. 
> 
> ‘Oh, I know where this is going!’ Adam laughed. He shook his head. 
> 
> Sophie leant forward and rested her arms on the table. She would definitely have to show up with someone who was the opposite of whichever suit-wearing bore the lot of them had picked. 
> 
> ‘So… what are you doing Monday night?’ Sophie said, then letting herself fall back into the chair again, ‘George?’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I most definitely didn't mean to take this long of a break but... this one's been a beast. I wrote two pages, then deleted them. Then wrote three and deleted the WHOLE thing. I'm still not entirely happy but I'm not sure I will ever be... 
> 
> Lockdown over here is slowly, slowly getting me in a bit of a dire mood and writing is the only fun thing I can do, so it was twice as frustrating not getting anywhere. 
> 
> Feel free to come and say 'hi' in the comments, if you're still sticking around!

‘Dinner’s just about ready,’ Gus mentioned as Sophie was opening a bottle of wine. 

‘Did you agree on a time, or should I just call them in?’ Sophie asked, slowly pouring the wine from the bottle into the decanter. She was careful about it, lowering her head to get a scent of the bouquet. It definitely needed air and she was intent on getting the choice of wine right. A red for fish was risky business. 

The kitchen was by far her favourite spot in the house. The house, especially the kitchen, screamed cottage, although it was much larger. 

Gus was washing his hands in the sink. ‘I think I’ll just need to watch over the pots on the stove.’ 

She nodded, put the decanter on the kitchen isle and went outside. 

Gus had been taking notes while cooking, no doubt thinking about using any of the dinner components on the menu at the restaurant in the future. He’d been fairly quiet all afternoon, after he’d finished off a game of football with the guys. She had watched them from the bench right outside the front door, her feet propped on the seat and a steaming mug in her lap. 

Matty had been showing off with a couple of tricks, mostly for her benefit, she guessed. 

After that, they had disappeared to the barn then. Sometimes Sophie and Gus heared George’s rhythmic drumming, sometimes they heard the whole band. But they let them work, despite Adam and then Ross inviting them to come and watch when they stopped by to pick up some bottles of water from the fridge. 

It had turned quiet though, for a while. Approaching the building, she could hear them bickering. Matty was explaining something and Ross asked, uncertainly, ‘Are you sure?’ 

She pushed the door open quietly and found them sitting on the floor, smoke billowing up and sheets of paper scattered around. 

Matty smiled a bit sheepishly at her when he passed, what was no doubt, a joint to George. She looked between them. Ross buried his face in his hands. 

‘Sorry. Do you mind? We didn’t asked,’ Adam muttered. He was stretched out on the floor, his head resting on his balled-up pullover. 

She rolled her eyes. ‘I lived in the Netherlands up until I was 18. Do you really think I’d mind?’ 

‘Good point,’ George said, raising a brow in question and holding the blunt out to her.

She chuckled. ‘It doesn’t mean I consume it though. Tried, didn’t work for me. Never tried again. Thanks for thinking I’m a walking cliché though.’ She blew George a kiss and he stubbed it out in an ashtray. Ross was gathering the paper. 

‘How did it not work for you?’ Matty asked, getting to his feet. He looked positively shocked.

Sophie shrugged. ‘It didn’t do anything for me. It didn’t make me feel relaxed, it didn’t make me giggle. Didn’t give me the munchies. Just made me feel really unwell the next day.’ 

She didn’t have to mention that dinner was ready, they seemingly just knew. Sophie lingered by the door as they made sure everything was switched off. It was ridiculous how fond of them she was growing so quickly. 

  
Gus had turned down the lights over the dining area and she’d put up candles earlier when setting the table. It looked a lot more formal than they had intended. 

‘Well, meals are definitely a big thing around here,’ Ross remarked, pulling out the chair Matty had taken at breakfast, ‘Not that I’m complaining.’ 

Sophie nodded. ‘It hasn’t been always like this though. We did have our fair share of microwave meals and dinners on the floor. It’s just a habit.’ 

‘I can’t even imagine that. You seem like you always had your shit together pretty well,’ Matty said. He was standing in the doorway, pulling on a black jumper over his t-shirt. 

Gus and Sophie broke into laughter. And just when they had calmed down, they looked at each other and Gus almost doubled over laughing. Sophie was actually still laughing when she sat down, placing the decanter into the middle of the table. 

‘I’ll have you know that… the first time I saw her she was dancing on a bar, with my girlfriend,’ Gus said, ‘So. You be the judge.’

Sophie sighed. ‘Those were the days.’ She remembered that night vividly, or at least parts of it. 

‘Is that so?’ Matty asked, dropping onto the chair next to her - after all Ross had taken his original seat. 

‘I can only remember parts of it, so we’ll have to trust him,’ Sophie said, ‘I wish I could either remember all of it, or not at all. At least then, I could pretend it didn’t happen.’ 

‘I didn’t see us being this… domestic, back then. And like, the two of us. Out of all the people,’ Gus said, lifting a casserole out of the oven and hurrying over to the table.

‘We were… like… the two who got lost along the way. What with you never going to uni and me dropping out. Like… we were the lost ones, but we never truly were because we found each other.’ Sophie looked down at her plate, ‘Did that even make sense?’ 

‘Wasn’t quite as poetic as you’d have liked but…’ Gus began, then turning away from the table again to pick up another pot, ‘I appreciate the sentiment.’ 

‘So, you met - via a mutual friend..?’ George asked. 

It had Sophie and Gus in fits again. She waited for Gus to sit down as well, then poured everyone a glass of wine.

‘Hold that thought for a minute…,’ Gus said, then getting out his phone and taking a picture of the set up, ‘I’ll probably need you to write a review tonight. Can’t review my own food.’ He looked at Sophie. She laughed but nodded. 

He then snapped a photo of them all. 

‘Should probably sent that to Jamie to prove we’re all very much alive and haven’t killed each other,’ George suggested. 

Eventually, when they’d loaded their plates, Sophie sighed. ‘So. Where to start? Came to London. Looked for a flat share and ended up living with Bethany, who was Gus’ girlfriend back then. She already had friends in London, and kinda invited me to come along wherever she went. So, on my first Friday night living in London… we got really plastered and he had to come and collect us at a club. Take us home. He hated me. Because Beth kept bringing me with her everywhere.’ 

‘She brought you over to my house on date nights,’ Gus justified himself, ‘You totally got in the way.’ 

Sophie pouted. 

‘But you don’t hate her now?’ Matty asked. It came out as a question although the answer was obvious. 

Gus shook his head. ‘Before we get to that bit. The wine’s excellent, Soph. It works well with the fish.’ 

‘It’s unusual to have red wine with anything fish-y though..?’ Adam enquired. 

‘The tannin acids actually mess with taste, or can mess with the taste of food. That’s why you usually have some white with it,’ she explained, ‘it did feel like a red kinda night though.’ 

‘Just so we’re very clear on this. You two are very lovely, generous people. But even if you weren’t, we’d keep you around for the excellent food and selection of drinks.’ Ross raised his glass after that. ‘Cheers!’ 

They laughed and George shoved at Ross’ shoulder. ‘Couldn’t even be mad at you. Maybe I’m just keeping Gus around because he feeds me well.’ Sophie replied, winking. 

‘Which brings us back to whether or not I hate her,’ Gus said. ‘Well, Bethany thought it would be so cute if we could find a guy for her. To do all the things we did as two couples. She’d set her mind on my flatmate, Alex. I mean - we’d been mates for a really long time and I could cope with him. But I actually knew it wouldn’t be fair to set them up.’ 

Sophie sighed. ‘And yet it somehow worked out for… almost three years. I’m fairly sure it already went messy after the second year but I guess we’ll never know.’ She shook her head and started eating. 

‘Alex and Bethany started… screwing around behind our backs. And Sophie figured it out. She watched them like a hawk for a month until things added up and then just caught them redhanded and that was it. I didn’t want to live with Alex anymore and she didn’t want to see Beth. Soph just moved in with me and we let the two of them be miserable.’ Gus finished off the story. 

‘Sounds a lot like it was meant to be. And you never - not to be insensitive. It just, would make sense, right?’ Adam concluded. Her eyes flickered to Gus, who was staring at his plate and shaking his head. Matty was jiggling his leg next to her. 

‘No. We never tried. I don’t think we could ever get back to this. And I’d rather not give up on it,’ Sophie said, ‘To the families we choose.’ She raised her glass again and kicked her foot against Gus. He looked at her, a bit sad, but repeated what she had said.

‘What’s the most embarrassing story you have to tell her about her then?’ Matty prodded in an attempt to lighten the mood. Sophie turned her head and looked at him, before pocking him in the arm with her finger. 

‘How dare! I’m sure everyone has a story about you!’ 

‘One? I have to choose one?’ George exclaimed. 

They sat at the table for a really long while, finishing the food and sharing stories.

It was a phone going off in the living room which killed the mood. 

‘Think that’s mine,’ Sophie muttered, not bothering to get up. 

‘You want me to…?’ Gus asked, already on his way. He returned to the table. ‘It’s Silvie.’ 

‘Oh. You think it’s a wedding emergency?’ She asked Gus, then looked up and addressed their guests, ‘she’s getting married in six weeks. And she’s Bridzilla.’ 

Gus was scratching the back of his head. She glanced at him, as he shuffled across the kitchen and started running the water for washing up. ‘Without asking why… can you do me a favour?’ 

‘Oh, what is it? Do we need to change the venue last minute? What do you know?’ she cried out. 

‘No. None of that. It’s got to do with the wedding in a broader sense. But… look. Can you maybe just text her you’ll call her back the day after tomorrow?’ Gus suggested. 

‘Now… what’s going to piss me off so badly?’ Sophie pressed. She pushed her chair back a little and crossed her arms in front of her chest. 

‘You’ve made us curious as well,’ Matty said, mimicking Sophie’s posture. She had to laugh at that but tried to put a stern face on again. 

Gus sighed and stopped the water from filling up the sink any further. 

‘Look. Don’t be mad at me, alright? It’s just… Maman and Silvia thought it might be nice if we had company at the wedding… which - which isn’t us. They just think it would be nice if you chatted to someone and had someone to dance - ‘ Gus explained. 

Sophie snorted. ‘I’m not sure dancing is on the agenda for me, not in high heels anyway, but do go on…’ 

‘There’s this guy working in my uncle’s company. He’s convinced that he’s… going to get somewhere in life and they thought it’d be nice if… they put him on our table.’ 

‘Just to get this straight - they’ve decided to find me a date. For the wedding. What the fuck are you talking about? I’ve matched my dress to your bowtie. Of course, you’re going to be my date.’ Sophie said, waving him off. 

‘We… just think it would be… a nice change. Jonathan seems like a polite guy.’

‘We? Like. Give me a second…’ Sophie spluttered. There was a moment of silence. She rolled her shoulders. ‘Uhm. You know his name and that he exists. Did you… like sit around and choose him for me?’ 

‘They’ve found me a date as well. Lovely, right?’, Gus said quickly, ‘Silvie is calling to invite us over for dinner Monday night. To meet them. I wasn’t supposed to tell you.’ 

Sophie burst into laughter, took a swig from her glass and rubbed at her eyes. ‘You posh, filthy-rich families and your desire to turn everyone’s lives miserable. Yeah, well. I’m not going.’

She put her glass back on the table with force. 

‘What do you mean - you are not going? It’s an invitation but one that’s not going to be denied.’

Sophie shrugged. 

‘Come on, Soph. I picked the nicest one of the bunch,’ Gus told her softly, ‘They thought it would be… nice for you to meet someone new and I wanted to make sure you’d at least not be bored after a minute.’ 

‘How terribly nice of you.’ She rolled her eyes once more for emphasis. ‘Nice is really… such a nice word. I’m sure it’ll all add up.’ 

Sophie and Gus stared at each other. And then it dawned on her. 

‘Wait. Wait. I am going…,’ she muttered, ‘How about I went and… brought a date all by myself?’ 

Gus coughed. ‘And how are you… Silvie knows all of your friends - how?’ 

Sophie laughed and shrugged. She’d have to find someone Silvie hadn’t met yet and wouldn’t exactly expect. 

‘Oh, I know where this is going!’ Adam called laughing. He shook his head. 

Sophie leant forward and rested her arms on the table. She would definitely have to show up with someone who was the opposite of whichever suit-wearing bore the lot of them had picked. 

‘So… what are you doing Monday night?’ Sophie said, then letting herself fall back into the chair again, ‘George?’ 

A lot of things happened at once. Adam choked on his own spit. 

‘Uhm?’ George replied around a mouthful of wine. She could hear Matty exhale loudly on her other side. 

‘That was unexpected,’ Ross remarked dryly.

Gus looked between Sophie and George. 

‘I… I -‘, George started. 

‘I’ll do it,’ Matty quipped, leaning forward and smiling at her. 

‘Yeah, no. I didn’t ask you,’ Sophie laughed, patting his shoulder. 

‘But he’s got a girlfriend?’ Matty protested exasperated. Sophie heard him but chose to ignore him this time. 

‘Right - right. Can we call her and ask her? I’m pretty sure she’ll get my plan though,’ she said. 

‘Yeah, yeah. That’s what I’m afraid of. I’m pretty sure you’d make amazing friends,’ George agreed, ‘But why me?’ 

‘Because I’m fairly sure they picked a guy about my height, who looked polished in a suit? Just some… face you won’t remember. And you’re almost twice my height and you’ve got dreads and tattoos. And they’ll absolutely hate the idea.’ Sophie said. ‘Which is a compliment by the way, don’t look confused. You’re gorgeous.’ 

Adam had stopped coughing, Matty stopped bickering and for a moment, it was absolutely silent. Gus returned with another bottle of wine for her to open and then leant his forearms onto the back of his chair. 

‘Well. Okay. To put George out of his misery. Don’t you think it would be easier if the two of us… just pretended for a bit? I mean - it would make them happy,’ Gus said slowly. 

Sophie looked at him. Then reached for the bottle of wine, peeling off the sealing. 

‘You know that’s an option, but one that’s entirely out of question. It’ll create an even bigger mess. You’ll get reality and white lie confused and I’ll break your heart and then it’ll go ugly. So, no.’ She knew it affected Gus and she knew everyone could see, so she snapped up the decanter and got up from her chair, making a show out of transferring the liquid from one vessel to the other. ‘That one’s even older.’ 

Her phone buzzed on the table. ‘I’ll send her a text and say we’re not done with dinner yet, should give us a few minutes to… sort things out. But in all honesty, George, you don’t have to do it, if you’re uncomfortable with it. I mean - given the circumstances, I’d totally get it if the whole thing freaked you out.’ 

George laughed. ‘I’ll do it. I’ll do it - but you’ll owe Jessie and me at least one of these fantastic meals.’ 

  
George’s girlfriend broke into a laughing fit once Sophie had introduced herself and explained the plot. She was an absolute angel about it and made George promise to live up to his role. 

Silvie, on the other hand, fell silent on her end of the phone. She hated when someone interfered with her plans. She hated it so much that refused to speak to Sophie in English, making her scramble to find the right French words and explain the situation. 

‘That went well,’ Sophie said sarcastically, tossing her phone onto the sofa. It took about two seconds for Gus’ phone to start ringing in the kitchen. 

‘I hate you so much,’ he muttered under his breath. He went to retrieve the phone and looked at the screen, then at her, ‘it’s my MOTHER.’ Gus pointed toward the patio and wandered off. He didn’t completely shut the door and she could hear him chatter on in French but didn’t get all of the words. 

‘Should I be scared..?’ George laughed unnerved.

Sophie shook her head. ‘No, no. It’ll be fine. Maman won’t be there and Silvie will do absolutely everything to not scare you away. She’d hate it if that happened and I had no one accompany me to the wedding.’ 

She laughed and started clearing the CDs and books from the coffee table. 

‘But I’m not going to the wedding with you..?’ George walked across the living room to lean against the desk propped up in the corner. His friends followed his example and came into the living room. Matty sprawled across one of the armchairs again. Adam helped her stack the books and Ross wandered up the stairs. 

‘No. You’re not. Although that would be fun,’ Sophie said. Matty scoffed at that. ‘I’ll just tell them we stopped seeing each other a bit before that. No worries. It’s all going to be alright. Gus and I will keep each other company, as we planned.’ 

  
Sophie announced the guys had to pick out a film and then looked around the living room. She turned down the light some more and went to the laundry room once more to find some blankets. 

She let Ross and George take a seat on the sofa, Adam took the other armchair. They had decided on some 80s classic which all of them had seen a fair few times already. 

‘You all set? Anyone need anything else to drink? A snack? Anything else?’ she asked. 

‘Sophie?’ Adam asked. 

‘Adam?’ she replied. 

‘Can you sit down for a minute? You and Gus have been running around all day trying to make us feel welcome. It was a generous invitation anyway and the two of you providing five-star hotel service is absolutely not necessary. So - do you need anything?’ 

‘I was wondering if anyone might want some tea or coffee,’ she said, sitting down on the short end of the corner sofa. ‘and thank you. It doesn’t bother us though, okay? We like doing that. I like creating a good time for people.’ Sophie said. 

Adam shook his head. ‘Didn’t you say you were off on holiday? Relax.’ 

‘Tea would be lovely, thanks. No sugar, splash of milk.’ 

Gus could still be heard talking on the phone hastily. Sophie couldn’t follow all of it because her French skills were indeed laughable. Matty was on his phone, scrolling absentmindedly. 

‘Who’s in charge of the music around here? It’s been running all day but… I haven’t seen any of you do anything about it,’ George asked. 

‘Oh, we just hooked the laptop up to the speakers and have a playlist running. We kind of added songs over the years. Feel free to change it. Put on something else,’ Sophie explained. 

George shook his head. ‘No. The music is amazing. That’s why I’m asking.’ 

‘Thank you, I guess. I’m afraid it’s not very current though. We listen to a lot of… our parents’ music, some of the trashy stuff from the nineties. Gus is into French rap and added some more recent songs. He always says the angsty emo shit and pop punk is my doing. And I’m sorry… I was all about the pop punk and pretty indie boys when I came to London.’ 

‘You’re really not big on current artists,’ Matty said, putting his phone down. 

‘Nope. My modern music knowledge kind of ends with the last time I went ‘clubbing’. And that’s truly been a while. Gus goes out, sometimes. But he does finish work earlier than I do on the weekends.’ 

Adam came back with a tray full of steaming mugs of tea and Gus in tow. Gus sat on the short end of the sofa and picked Sophie’s feet up to put in his lap. She smiled at him. And pulled a face. 

‘Everything alright with Maman?’ she taunted her friend. 

‘She wanted to know everything about that mysterious guy you are seeing. I told her I didn’t know anything noteworthy. She’ll probably call you tomorrow. Sophie, just promise me you are not going to mess with the wedding.’ Gus stared at her sternly. 

‘I might not get the hype. But I’ll not wreck the wedding, no worries,’ she tried to allay his fears, ‘I do like your family. Even if everyone’s acting like we’re in some Jane Austen period drama.’ 

  
By the time the credits started rolling on the screen it was almost midnight. Sophie stretched her arms over her head and sighed. ‘It’s easy getting used to this. We work too much, Gus.’ 

Gus laughed and lifted her feet of his lap to get up. 

‘I’ll ask you again in a couple of days. You and I both are workaholics and you know it.’ He picked up the tray Adam had brought in earlier and cleared up the empty mugs. ‘Anyone need anything else?’ 

‘I think I might actually head to bed in a minute,’ George declared. Ross nodded. 

‘You’ve all had an early morning, right,’ she remembered, ‘Gus, what time were you planning on leaving for the day out?’ 

Her friend was rummaging around in the kitchen. ‘I don’t know. Eleven-ish, maybe? Unless you all want to sleep until late.’ 

‘Sounds good?’ Sophie asked, ‘I mean - if you don’t want to go, that’s alright too.’

No one obliged. 

Sophie’s phone buzzed next to her on the sofa. And again. And again. It actually buzzed a few more times. There was a soft ‘pop’ behind her and then a bottle of champagne appeared in front of her face. She reached up to grab for it and Gus’ arms slung around her neck from behind. She giggled as she read the label. Gus leant forward. 

‘Happy Birthday, love,’ he said, kissing her cheek, pulling away a little and kissing the top of her head. 

‘YOU ARE JOKING!’ Matty cried out from where he was lounging on the armchair. He sat up straight. ‘It’s not your birthday.’ 

Sophie laughed, glanced at her phone screen and said, ‘It’s past midnight, I’m afraid it is.’ 

Ross groaned. ‘You could have said something, Gus!’ 

Sophie took a swig from the bottle, closing her eyes as the bubbles tickled her tongue. 

‘We don’t make a big deal out of birthdays anymore. We usually work,’ Gus said. 

Sophie nodded while she swallowed another sip of champagne. ‘Just open a bottle of the really good stuff and that’s that, to be honest. We’re lucky if we get to eat together during the day. Honestly. No worries.’ 

Ross got up first, motioning for her to stand up as well. He hugged and congratulated her. 

‘I know you don’t ask ladies how old they turn but…’ Adam started. Sophie laughed. 

‘I’m hardly a lady, Adam. Hardly. Twenty-seven. One step closer to the old thirty.’ She nearly clocked him with the bottle as she threw her arms around him. 

‘Careful with that!’ Gus called. 

Before she could hit George in the same way, she passed it over to Gus. He brandished the bottle. ‘Do we need glasses?’ 

Sophie laughed. ‘I already drank from it, so no.’ 

‘Happy Birthday, Sophie. All the best for everything you’ve planned,’ George told her as he hugged her as well. 

She shuffled around him then, as Matty had untangled himself from the armchair and was smiling at her. 

‘No wonder you’ve got your shit together, at twenty-seven,’ he mocked her. 

She shook her head at him and leant into his arms. ‘I’ve got what? Two years on you?’ 

‘Two and a half, actually,’ he muttered in her ear, letting his lips brush her cheek. ‘Happy Birthday, old lady.’

Gus actually cackled loudly at that and then held the bottle out to her. She took another sip before the bottle made its round. 

‘Not that there were any expectations to meet, but this is already turning out to be the loveliest birthday I had in a while. Thank you for coming out here. I’ll admit that I thought this was one of Gus’ worst ideas and I was pretty glad that the morning after the party, there was no talk about it,’ Sophie said, leaning into Gus, ‘but it’s bloody lovely to be meeting new people. Especially, when they’re leading interesting lives and have stories to tell.’ 

After that, George went out for a last cigarette and Matty followed, saying he’d be off to the barn and everyone else turned in, at last. 

She folded up the blankets and fluffed up the pillows on the sofa, collected the leftover glasses and put them in the sink. 

Eventually, she picked up her phone to check the birthday messages she had received. It was Matty’s message which showed caught her attention though. 

  
_‘Come on over._  
_I doubt it’s going to get any quieter around here. M.’_

  
Sophie glanced at the screen, then took in the room around her. It was quiet, mostly. She could hear her laptop quietly buzzing on the desk but else than that she couldn’t hear a single noise. She sighed, draped a blanket around her and almost stumbled over it. 

It was much colder outside than she expected it to be and she moved quickly over the lawn and into the barn. She pulled the door open and was surprised to see that Matty had only turned on a small lamp over by the lounge. He was sitting on the floor, an acoustic guitar in his lap, his phone and some papers scattered around him. 

She approached slowly, leaning over the back of an armchair. 

‘I was hoping you hadn’t gone to bed yet,’ he said. 

‘Is that so?’ 

He nodded and gestured for her to sit down. She let herself fall into the armchair she had been leaning on while he fiddled with he tuning keys of his guitar. 

‘Are you going to play me a song?’ she asked, although she was just teasing. 

‘Considering we didn’t know it is your birthday and we didn’t bring a present, it’s the least I can do,’ he said with a shrug. ‘Any requests?’ 

‘Do I only get to choose your songs or any song?’ 

‘I suppose I could try and cover whichever song you request, but why should I do a bad version when there’s a perfectly good song out there?’ he replied. 

She laughed. ‘Well, you do know I know too little about your band to request anything by title. Now - that sounds wrong. I should probably get a little more invested in that. I did like the… the love song you played at your show. You looked… really vulnerable right then.’ 

‘I wrote that a long time ago,’ he said softly, staring ahead of him. 

‘Anymore of that sort of thing? Something you didn’t play at the show?’ 

Matty nodded and re-adjusted the guitar in his lap. He cleared his throat and started a simple melody. ‘It sounds better when I play it with Hann, but we’ll have to… go with this.’ He shot her an unsure smile. 

‘Are you nervous?’ 

‘No!’ he replied, a little too loudly maybe. ‘I never wanted to… be the singer. I really have to work for it.’ 

‘A little challenge never hurt, right?’ 

He cleared his throat one more time and picked up the melody again. She listened intently. He didn’t look at her, not until he heard the blanket rustle next to him. Sophie got out her phone, and took a photo of him. He closed his eyes when he realised what she was doing and just played on. Although the photo didn’t do the situation justice, couldn’t preserve the sounds, she still wanted to be able to remember that moment in time. He 

She watched how he changed between strumming and plucking the strings on the guitar, listened to how his voice would break once or twice. When he finished, he left his head hanging for a moment and ran a hand over his face. 

‘That was beautiful,’ she murmured, ‘Thank you.’

Matty scratched his neck. After a moment, he put the guitar down and fumbled for a cigarette. When he’d lit it, he pulled up his knees and looked at her, inhaling the smoke. 

‘This all makes more sense to me now. You make more sense to me now,’ Matty said quietly, raising his eyes towards hers. 

Sophie slumped forward a little. ‘What do you mean?’

‘You’re a bit of a control freak. You mold your life around your friend’s needs and ideas and make him believe that you’re happy to follow along, when in reality, you’re holding the reigns and leading the way,’ he told her, ‘but not in a malicious way.’ 

‘So, you’re saying I’m manipulative,’ she concluded, fully well knowing that she was exaggerating what he had said. She watched as he smirked and shook his head. 

‘I did just say that you’re not meaning harm. You do love him.’ 

‘I love him. But I’m no attracted to him.’ She shrugged. ‘I get jealous when he spends more time with some of our other friends and I’m not around. I always fear I’m missing out. But I wouldn’t ever, ever get in bed with him. Which doesn’t mean that I think he’s hideous or anything. He’s good-looking.’

‘But you are attracted to me,’ he retorted, winking at her. 

‘Fishing for compliments, are we?’ Sophie joked. He smiled at her and shook his head again. 

‘I was wondering where that came from, the other day. Whether you liked being bossy. But it’s what you do, in every aspect of your life. And then you walked off without - getting anything out of it.’ 

Sophie nodded. She wasn’t sure whether he was finished with what he had to say. She studied his face and only spoke when he cocked his head at her, waiting for an answer. 

‘Look. Things happened and made me uncomfortable and took away the fun for a bit. I’ve dated one or two guys who…,’ Sophie was fumbling for words. 

Matty scooted forward a little. ‘What did they do?’ She noticed the anger in his voice. He looked alarmed. 

‘No, Matty. Nothing violent happened. God, no,’ she said quickly. ‘It just wasn’t much fun. I felt like I was caught in a bad porn. I like to know the filthy things which go on in a guy’s mind, how else can we make sure it’s fun for both of us? But I don’t like when it gets condescending or… degrading. I’m not into that. Didn’t do anything for me.’ 

Matty didn’t reply. He finished his cigarette, stretched his legs and leant back on his arms. 

Sophie squirmed in her seat and put her feet on the ground. She cleared her throat. ‘Right. I guess I’ll - Sorry, I talk too much. I’ll head back -‘ 

Matty shook his head. ‘No, why?’

‘All that notional talk about sex isn’t really sexy, is it?’ Sophie shrugged. 

Matty shifted into a kneeling position before her, his arms coming to rest on her knees. She couldn’t get up without pushing him off. A faint smile kept playing about his lips as he looked up at her. He caught on that it made her nervous, being scrutinised that way. Sophie looked around and away, anywhere but at his face. 

‘I don’t think I’ve ever dissected someone’s sexual behaviour that thoroughly before actually sleeping with them. But you know what will be enticing? Finding out what you call fun.’ He pushed himself up on his arms and craned his neck to be able to kiss her. 

She smiled into the kiss, leaning forward to meet him. When Matty could be sure that they were very much on the same page, he reached up to cup her face in his hands. His fingers splayed across her skin, thumbs skimming softy across her cheeks. Once she let his tongue slip past her lips, she sighed, contentedly. She reached out blindly to let her hands roam over his back, nails scratching over the fabric. 

Sophie laughed when he hooked his arms around her waist and pulled her forward. ‘Come here.’   
A little ungracefully, she landed on her knees, now straddling him with her arms looped around his neck. Matty giggled, resting his forehead briefly against her shoulder before turning it, so he could kiss along her jaw. 

She softly pulled on a strand of his hair, so he nipped at her lip. She pulled again, so he softly nipped at her neck. 

Sophie spluttered. ‘What are you doing? You can’t give me a hickey, mate!’ 

They both laughed until she caught his mouth in a kiss again. 

‘You need to stop squirming,’ he muttered against her lips, gripping her waist firmly.

‘Oh..?’ Sophie stuck out her bottom lip as she scooted back and sat down on the floor, her back resting against the chair. 

Matty let his hands run up her legs, his thumbs traveling right up the inseam of her jeans. She looked at him and only averted her eyes when he raised an eyebrow to provoke her. He stopped short of her crotch, his fingers digging into her muscles softly. 

Sophie’s glance flicked between his hands and his eyes. Matty was amused. He’d caught her by surprise and seemed to enjoy that it had unsettled her. She swallowed and bit her lip. Then she grabbed both his wrists and brought his hands up to the waistband of her jeans. 

‘You do know how to take them off, yeah?’ she mumbled, raising an eyebrow at him in return. 

He scoffed as he slipped the button through the hole. 

‘Sophie?’ 

The old handle of the heavy door creaked. 

‘Sophie?’ Gus’ voice rang out into the silence again. 

Matty froze momentarily and both stared at each other. He swiped for the neck of his guitar and stood up. Sophie pulled her legs up, careful not to make any sound. She was hoping that if she cowered behind the armchair, she wouldn’t have to explain anything. 

‘Nah, it’s just me,’ Matty replied, holding the guitar in front of him. He leant against the chair and shrugged. 

  
‘Have you seen Sophie? She was going to stay up for a bit but she hasn’t come to bed and she’s not at her desk,’ Gus said. 

Matty shook his head. ‘I headed out when all of you were still in the living room.’ 

‘Yeah, I saw you and George go outside, so I figured she might have joined you.’ Sophie could hear Gus move about. 

‘George went to bed. I… don’t sleep quite so well. Thought I might use the time and… work. Toss some ideas around,’ Matty said, walking away from the chair. She couldn’t see but it sounded like he put the guitar back in its stand. 

‘If working here is fruitful, I fully expect my name in the credits,’ Gus joked. 

‘Definitely. Thanks for inviting us,’ Matty replied and Sophie could hear amusement in his voice. 

‘I’m gonna get back and check whether she’s out on the porch - fancy a nightcap? I’ve had this idea,’ Gus said. 

‘Yeah, yeah. Just - let me get my things.’ Matty came walking back towards her, gathering the paper and picking up his cigarettes. She could hear the door creak again, so Gus was already on his way out. 

‘Open the window in the laundry room, ok?’ Sophie hissed. 

Matty nodded, then switched out the lamp. 

When their voices had faded out and she was sure they’d reached the house, she gingerly made her way across the room, trying not to knock over anything in the process. She carefully opened the door and peered outside. The light went on in the kitchen, so she slipped out of the door and crossed over to the cars, sneaking around towards the back of the house. When she reached the window, it was already open. 

It was ridiculous, really, and she quietly laughed to herself as she hoisted herself up onto the windowsill and into the room. The door was closed. Sophie switched on the light and congratulated herself on her excellent idea. The laundry dryer had yet to be emptied, so she at least had a reason to appear from that particular room. With a stack of folded laundry she walked down the corridor into the living room. 

‘Hey!’ Gus called as he spotted her from where he was leaning against the counter in the kitchen. 

‘You’re still up,’ she said, slowly walking over. ‘You coming to bed?’ 

He lifted up a tumbler filled with a shot of golden liquid and shook his head. He pointed towards Matty, who was sitting at the dining table with his own glass. ‘We’re having a nightcap. I was looking for you over in the barn. Didn’t think you’d be busying yourself with household chores on your birthday.’ 

She shrugged. ‘Well, I’ll hit the sack.’ For emphasis, she ran a hand over her face as if trying to brush off the tiredness. 

Sophie backed away again, pointing towards the stairs over her shoulder with her free hand. 

Gus and Matty resumed their conversation as she started ascending towards the first floor. 

She put the clothes she’d folded earlier onto the sideboard and made a mental note to straighten out the room at least a little in the morning. She’d truly just dumped her things into one corner. 

Sophie stalled briefly when she started to undo her trousers. As she closed her eyes, she could still feel Matty’s fingers press into her thighs.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I'm so sorry for making it seem like I had abandoned this story.   
> I promise I haven't. 
> 
> I'm 35, I live alone with my two cats. I'm a crazy catlady. And at the beginning of February, my tomcat, my baby, was diagnosed with lung cancer. Those past four weeks have been some of the worst weeks of my life. I never thought I could get attached to a pet in the way I have but... there were a lot of angsty nights spent crying. Sleeping on the floor next to him when he was still out of it from being put under. And right now, he's got, on top of everything, a nasty skin condition which requires for him to wear the cone of shame and for me to care for him 24/7. And that's why I haven't been able to write: 
> 
> I didn't feel up to it. I was unhappy. I was sad. I was crying and basically just staring at his little chest rising and falling and praying for many, many more days spent with him. I did read anything which has been updated on this site though and believe me when I say that those few minutes were sometimes the only moments I didn't cry. 
> 
> It took three long weeks to figure out the best treatment for my cat and for all the lab results to come in. The tumor can be removed by surgery and we will have that done in the next few weeks. So... if I go missing again, it's because I'm busy caring for my little love. 
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed for us, but mostly for him. It is a big, very risky surgery but it's our only option for many more happy years to come.

As Sophie stumbled into the kitchen the next morning, just past 8, the coffeemaker was already running. She found Adam and George sitting on the patio smoking, and waved at them through the windows. 

With a glass of water in hand, she pulled the door open and softly said ‘Good morning’. 

‘Hey, birthday girl,’ Adam replied, getting up and hugging her. 

She sighed. ‘Don’t remind me. Still twenty-seven. Still old. Still almost thirty. But you’re up early. Fresh out of the shower already, I see.’ 

George squeezed her shoulder as she sat down in an empty chair next to him. 

‘Everyone else is still asleep?’ George asked. 

‘Didn’t see anyone out there. Gus and Matty had a nightcap when I went to bed. I have no clue how long they were up. I didn’t hear Gus coming in.’ She leant back into the chair and looked up. It was a beautiful day, with a bright blue sky and sunshine. ‘I seldom have sunshine for my birthday. It’ll be lovely to hang out around the ruins for a bit.’ 

Sophie let her eyes slip shut, the sun was warming the skin of her face. The three of them were quiet for a some moments, until someone opened and closed the door to step outside. She refused to open her eyes against the brightness and just waited for somebody else to speak. There was the sound of a lighter being used, the smell the cigarette smoke, someone’s body radiating off warmth. Whoever had come outside, stood behind her chair and blocked out the sunlight.

A wet drop landed on her face. 

She slowly opened her eyes and froze. She was gazing up at Matty’s very naked, very attractive torso, and into his smiling face. His hair was wet and dripping. 

Heat rose on her cheeks and his happy smile turned into a very satisfied smirk. Matty even had the audacity to wink at her. 

She cleared her throat. ‘I thought you were Gus,’ she mumbled and scratched awkwardly at her neck. He turned his head to the left to blow out some smoke. 

She could feel George’s curious stare without looking at him and decided she best got up and busy herself with breakfast preparations. 

Just as Sophie went inside, she could hear George hiss sharply. ‘What was that all about?’ 

Matty looked at George, then over at Sophie as she was turning around to close the door behind her. She felt caught and turned on her heel, crossing the room, so she wouldn’t permanently glance outside. She could tell they were bickering, but the door blocked out all the noise.

**

‘Right, last chance to back out of this,’ Sophie announced as she picked up her jacket from the coatrack by the front door.

She looked at her male companions. ‘If any of you would rather stay here..?’ They all shook their heads. Ross had told her earlier that he enjoyed how much time they were spending outside as opposed to sticky tour busses, dark venues and cramped studios. 

‘We just need to figure out if we’re dropping you off at the top. Or will you be okay to take the stairs?’ Gus asked. 

She shrugged. ‘I guess I didn’t come to Whitby to just look down the 199 steps from the top, mate.’ 

Gus sighed but nodded. ‘Right, off we go then.’ 

They took the guys’ van into town. Gus gave George directions from the passenger seat and she was sitting in the far back with Matty, who had squeezed in beside her, taking 

‘I take it that this is your idea of fun, then? Traipsing around ruins on a sunny day?’ Matty asked just as they were pulling onto the road. He was smiling broadly though, pushing a pair of sunglasses on top of his head. 

‘It’s perfection, really. Decent company makes it even better,’ she winked at him and looked out of the window on her side, ‘but I’m a nerd, sorry. I get a kick out of ancient buildings and what’s left of them.’ 

‘Good thing,’ Matty started, leaning over the middle seat which was empty, ‘that you’re cute while being nerdy.’ 

She was fairly sure that no one else heard what he was saying as the guys in the front were involved in their own little conversation about cars. Ross was hanging over the side of the driver’s seat and Adam was leaning forward in his seat too. 

Sophie rolled her eyes at Matty and smiled. ‘Good thing you’re really, really attractive,’ she muttered. Sophie shifted in her seat, leaning her head back against the window and stretching her legs out towards him. He mirrored her position, sneaking a shoe-cladded foot between her boots. It made her roll her eyes at him again, but both had to giggle as well. 

‘You alright there, in the back?’ Adam asked, craning his neck back towards them. 

‘Perfectly fine,’ she replied, smiling sheepishly. He raised a curious eyebrow but turned back around when Gus called ‘What do you say, Adam?’. 

‘Was that why you bolted inside earlier today?’ Matty asked. 

She frowned. ‘Oh - you mean because I was so taken aback by your disarming looks?’ She tried to laugh it off, but he was actually right. ‘Oh, don’t flatter yourself.’ 

‘I’m right, aren’t I?’ he taunted. Sophie tried not to blush but she could feel her cheeks heating up again. It was a frequent occurrence now with him around. ‘You’re not too bad yourself.’ He blew her a kiss, before leaning forward a little to catch her hand with his own. She glanced at him, to the front, back at him. Everyone else was busily involved in the conversation up front. Matty squeezed her hand once but nodded and withdrew. 

If she hadn’t injured her foot earlier that week, she’d have loved to walk the distance from the house to the town centre. Being by the sea felt oddly liberating. Sophie loved London. She couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. But a change of scenery and distance to their everyday life was enlightening. She’d meant it when she’d told Gus that they were working too much. Sophie just wasn’t sure how to change anything about that. 

She couldn’t cut down on her hours. 

And that was actually a lie - she could. Before she could ponder anymore on the matter, George pulled into a car park and stopped the car. 

‘Everything alright?’ Matty asked, looking a bit puzzled. ‘You look really worried, all of a sudden.’   
He moved over into the middle seat. Ross opened the sliding door. 

‘Yeah, I was just - wondering about something. I’m fine.’ she said.   
Ross offered her his arm, so she could clamber out of the back of the car and Matty handed her the pair of crutches Gus had insisted she take with her. Sophie rolled her eyes but took them anyway, shouldering her bag but struggling with keeping it in place. 

‘Let me get that,’ Matty said, not waiting for her reply. He stole the bag off her shoulder and slung is over his head. ‘What’s in there? Bricks?’ 

He was right. The bag was heavy. 

‘Shut up. I’m just prepared for all situations,’ she told him. 

‘Is that so?’ he asked, wriggling his eyebrows. Sophie glared. She was just about to reply when Gus announced that he knew the way and could they please all follow. She tried her best in keeping up and she was doing fine without the crutches but Sophie just couldn’t walk at her usual pace. 

The doctor had told her to take it easy, so the swelling could go down. But the splint was meant to keep her mobile after that. Although the doctor surely hadn’t envisioned for her to be smashing 199 uneven steps. 

It was George who waited up for her eventually, lightening up a cigarette and walking slowly beside her. 

‘You can just catch up with them. I’ll be fine,’ she said. 

‘I thought it would be time for us to… talk about that dinner on Monday,’ he said slowly, ‘Did you want to come up with a detailed background story?’ 

Sophie nodded. ‘You were in London at the beginning of the month, right? Then let’s just go with that. You lot came by for food, you asked me for a cigarette and we bumped into each other around the back smoking.’ 

‘Do we disclose my job?’ 

‘Yes, sure. You do know how keen they are on a stable, good career. They’ll absolutely hate it,’ she laughed. ‘Sorry. I hope I - I don’t mean to be offensive when I say that.’ 

‘No offense taken.’ He smiled.

‘Gus’ family are so money-driven. He isn’t. But everyone else in that family is all about careers and money and bricks and mortar. Anything else that is not as financially promising is a joke to them. Unless you’re a girl - then you’re going to be married off rich anyway and you can just do whatever you like.’ She looked at him. ‘You work in arts and entertainment, and yes, you’re successful now. But they will worry about it in the long run and there’s the fact that you’re probably away a lot of the time. Silvie is a lovely girl but she will ask questions. And if she’s snide, although I doubt she will be, you have my permission to be just as snide in return.’ 

George laughed. ‘Oh, I wouldn’t dare.’ 

‘Honestly, it would only serve them right for trying to set me up.’ Sophie said. 

George flicked the cigarette bud to the floor and stubbed it out. He wasn’t looking at her, when he spoke. ‘Why didn’t you ask Matty?’ 

Sophie smiled. ‘Because I asked you?’ 

He stepped closer, until he was towering over her. His lips were quirking up at the corners, betraying the stern look he was going for. ’Don’t be evasive.’

‘I already told you. Because you’re so much taller than me and you’ve got this amazing edgy look about you and that’ll shake them to their core,’ she said. 

George nodded. ‘It has nothing to do with Matthew’s presence making you nervous because he’s trying to charm his way into your heart?’ 

Sophie shrugged. ‘None of you have to try and charm their way into my life. You’re a lovely bunch of lads and I’m glad we ran into each other.’ 

‘But that doesn’t answer my question,’ George insisted. He put his arm around her shoulder and led her around the corner everyone else had long rounded. ‘When I ask Matty about you, he is just as vague about the situation as you are.’ 

‘Maybe there is no situation to be vague about?’ Sophie winked at him. 

George groaned. ‘The two of you are impossible.’ She was laughing when they caught up with everyone else. The rest of their group had stopped at the bottom of the stairs and waited for them. 

‘Right. No one needs to wait for me, I’ll just hobble up as fast as I can and I’ll meet you at the top?’ Sophie said. 

‘That’s a no from me. And there’s no hobbling up fast. You’re going to be careful,’ Gus said. ‘Come on, I’ll stick with you.’ 

The six of them made slow progress on the climb. 

‘There’s that story that if you’re counting the steps on your way up and on the way down, you’ll never get the same number,’ Gus said, as they were about halfway up. The wind was blowing a bit harsher there. 

‘You mention that now? I’d have tried to prove them wrong,’ Sophie cried. 

‘Of course you would,’ Gus muttered. 

Sophie let herself fall on the narrow bench on the side. ‘Can I have my bag, please?’ 

Matty stepped over and she unzipped it as it was still hanging over his shoulder. Sophie took out her camera and fiddled with the settings. 

‘A camera. Is that a book?’ Matty asked, staring into the open bag. ‘What else is here? What do you have in your purse? It’s bursting at the seems!’ He snuck a hand inside and rummaged through the contents. 

She scowled at him, but then lifted the camera up and snapped a photo of the view in front of them. It was magnificent. ‘Come on, you lot. Huddle together.’ She made them crowd close against the backdrop of rooftops and the sea. The water was glistening beneath the sunshine. All five of them flashed her broad smiles and she praised the heavens for sending every single one of them her way. 

‘If you want to - you can go over and check the ruins out already. I’m just gonna wander around here for a bit and indulge,’ Sophie told them, once they’d reached the top. She was stepping up to Matty and fumbling for the book in her handbag. The cemetery outside of St. Mary’s was featured in one of her favourite books and she was keen on spending some time there. 

‘What’s that?’ he asked, snatching the book off her. ‘Dracula?’ 

‘Yeah, Mina Harker resides here in Whitby for a while. In actual fact, Bram Stoker came here at the end of the 19th century. So… I’m just gonna go and read that bit and check out the scenery which is described in here,’ Sophie explained, waving the book in the general direction of the graveyard. 

‘So, you’re not just a history nerd but also a literary nerd?’ Matty concluded. 

‘I wouldn’t quite put it like that,’ Gus said, ‘she’s a Victorian fangirl. Much like contemporary music, she dislikes contemporary literature.’ 

‘That’s so not true,’ Sophie protested, whacking his shoulder with her copy of ‘Dracula’. 

‘Is true,’ Gus said again, poking his tongue out at her. 

‘I just… like all those pretty words, okay? And I like the decor and clothes. But it was a very repressive time for women and everyone who didn’t fit social conventions,’ she remarked, swatting at Matty’s hands as he was rooting through her handbag again. 

‘See - total fangirl. Every time we go to Paris, we go Wilde’s grave and she brings flowers,’ Gus revealed. Matty quirked an eyebrow at her. 

Sophie sighed in fake annoyance. ‘Go on, keep the taunting coming. And one day, you’ll come home and find your sleek designer furniture being replaced by all the beautiful antiques you hate.’ 

Gus cackled. ‘You wouldn’t do that.’ 

She held up her phone. ‘I have go enough photos of the flat to put your stuff up on eBay right now.’ She stopped dead and stared at him. Gus stared back. Then he laughed. Sophie started typing on her phone. 

Gus lunged for her but she managed to hold it away from it. It was Matty who snatched it from her. 

‘That’s not your flat though, right?’ he wondered, staring at the screen. Ross gazed over his shoulder. ‘How much space it that?’ 

Sophie shrugged. ‘A lot. I don’t know.’ 

Gus rattled off the details in a hurry. They all raised their eyebrows at that. It was a large flat in a swanky rebuilt and refurbished part of east London. 

Ross whistled through his teeth. ‘You definitely have to invite us round sometime.’ 

Adam cleared his throat and then spoke. ‘Let’s make a deal: We’ll walk through the cemetery with you, then go to the museum, see if we can pick up some tea there and then sit out in the sun for a bit and you can read some of the relevant passages to us?’ 

‘See, Gus. That’s the kind of spirit I can work with!’ Sophie cheered, ‘let’s get going then!’ 

While they were walking, she tossed out some trivia on Bram Stoker, about his connection to Oscar Wilde and Victorian ghost stories. The guys, minus Gus who had heard it all before, indulged her with questions and she was happy to yap on about the things she liked. 

After their visit to the museum and a thorough inspection of the ruins, they settled down at one of the picnic tables. The sun was still warm enough for them to strip of their jackets. Sophie closed her eyes as she raised her face towards the sun. 

George offered to pick up coffee and Gus as well as Adam volunteered to help him. She was left with Matty and Ross. But latter excused himself and took a call from his brother. He wandered off which left only the two of them. 

Sophie opened one eye and peered at Matty. He was busying himself with his phone until she moved to straddle the bench and then lifted her injured ankle up. 

‘Are you okay?’ he asked. He got up and came around to her side. His wide t-shirt was billowing in the slight breeze and made him look much younger than he was. The sunglasses still held his hair back as he towered over her. 

She closed her eyes again but smiled up at him. Matty cleared his throat and as his shadow fell over here, he muttered, ‘You look really rather happy right now. And I really want to kiss you.’ 

The kiss never came though. 

There was a bit of a high-pitched gasped, before indistinct female chatter came closer. 

Sophie could tell that Matty was taking a step away from her and she sighed, loud enough for him to hear. Before he could reply, three girls arrived at the table. 

‘You’re Matty, right?’ one of them asked. ‘You’re in that band.’ He grinned and nodded, then craned his neck and pointed out Ross, who was standing a few meters away. ‘Ross is right here. The other guys are just getting coffee.’

Sophie kept silent and fiddled with her phone, going trough some messages she had received for her birthday but still keeping up with the conversation Matty had going. It was hard guessing the girls’ age, probably younger than Matty but it was hard to tell. They had been to the band’s recent show and were discussing songs with him. He laughed blithely and the smile he was sporting lit up his face. 

From afar, she could hear George say, ‘Oh, we’ve been spotted.’ One of the girls turned around and blushed. She’d been quietly following the conversation while her friends were animatedly chatting to Matty. Oh, she was definitely in favour of George. 

Gus held out a paper cup for Sophie and signaled for her to get up. They sat down on the grass a few feet away from the table to leave the guys to taking photos and chatting some more. Sophie put her head on Gus’ shoulder as they sat there. She told him who had messaged her that morning and that one of those people had been Alex. She didn’t mind him saying hello, it was the first time he’d made an effort for her birthday since their split. 

‘I can tell him to leave you alone, if it bothers you,’ Gus suggested. ‘We don’t have to spend time in our flat.’ 

‘No. No. It’s alright. I just think it’s odd to be starting with it now. After all this time,’ she wondered. 

‘He’s slowly growing up, you know. He’s changed, a lot.’ 

Sophie sighed. ‘I don’t have to like him to be civil when he’s around. He can come over, I really don’t mind. I can’t guarantee I’ll be nice when he’s talking shit though.’ Gus nodded. There was a moment of silence. 

‘We’ve been talking dinner. We’ve agreed something as simple as pasta would be nice, so there’s enough time for a bit of a bonfire, yeah? I thought you might like that,’ Gus said. 

Sophie hummed. ‘Sounds divine. We should probably pick up something nice to drink on our way back.’

‘I was thinking something like Armagnac,’ Gus said. 

‘Would go nicely with come Côtes de Gascogne vine. Good choice,’ Sophie agreed. 

Ross called Gus over to take a group photo. Sophie stretched out and rolled onto her front. Her ankle was, admittedly, killing her. She closed her eyes. And dozed off. 

A warm hand settled on top of her shoulder. The warmth was seeping through the fabric to her skin. Sophie blinked her eyes open. Quite some time had definitely passed. She took in the smell of the grass, listened to the muffled sounds of people moving around the area before turning her head a little. 

‘Where is everyone?’ Her voice was a little hoarse. 

Matty was sitting beside her crosslegged. ‘Gus said he needed to pick up some things for dinner and then they’re all bringing the car around. We figured you fell asleep because those steps tired you out.’ 

She nodded. ‘How long was I out for?’ 

‘More than an hour.’ 

‘How rude of me,’ she mumbled and turned on her back. She stretched, throwing her arms over her head. Something in her neck popped loudly. Matty winced at that. He reclined beside Sophie and cleared his throat. 

‘About earlier…,’ he began but then trailed off. She was watching him curiously from the side, how he swallowed and scratched at his cheek before he rose up a little and leant over. ‘I’m going to kiss you now.’ 

Sophie was going to say something about someone seeing them but the firm press of his lips against hers, his hand cupping her cheek, the length of his body pressing up against her side made her forget. The kiss wasn’t overly sexual, there was none of the suggestive banter they enjoyed. The way he tucked some hair behind her ear made Sophie’s heart swell. 

Before she could dwell on any of it, Matty’s signaled an incoming message. 

He groaned but sat up. ‘They’re in the car. It’s only going to take them a couple of minutes.’ 

And just like that, their moment there was gone again.

**

Matty and George had disappeared to work on some music when they got back home. Ross and Adam had gladly agreed on chopping wood for the bonfire and Gus had disappeared into the kitchen.

And Sophie - she’d been forbidden to move around at all by all five of them. They’d banished her onto the sofa with a bag of ice and a cup of tea. 

‘As simple as pasta’ wasn’t quite so simple when it involved Gus. He came up with a variety of salads, a stately display of antipasti and pasta cooked to perfection. He pointed out the bottles of spirits he had picked up in town and urged them to eat up, so that they could have a little brandy tasting by the fire. 

As dusk set in, she watched as they lit up the fire.

As darkness finally fell onto them, they’d all gotten cozy on some thick blankets. There were cigarette, weed and beer. 

Gus looked at her questioningly at one point, when George offered him the smoking joint. 

‘You don’t need to get my permission,’ Sophie said, holding up her hands in a defensive manner,   
‘I’m not your minder and I don’t… judge.’ 

Gus leaned forward and took the blunt off George. He inhaled deeply and held the smoke for a moment, before blowing it out, spluttering slightly. ‘It’s strong.’ 

‘Yeah, sorry. I should have warned you,’ George laughed before taking the joint back and taking a drag himself. ‘You alright?’

Gus nodded and settled back against Sophie’s back. She leant her head back against his and gazed up into the sky. ‘I love that we caught the last few nice days out here.’ 

‘It’s a bit like back in France. Just chilling outside until we fall asleep,’ Gus muttered, ‘Maybe you are right. Maybe we are working too much and spending too little time on fun things.’ 

‘When did we grow old and boring?’ Sophie laughed. It made the guys chuckle as well. ‘You know what I miss most?’ There was a long silence before the guys started guessing. She shook her head at all of them. 

‘Not being tired all the time,’ she declared eventually. She could hear Gus laugh. 

Adam got up and walked over to the barn. He disappeared inside and then came back with an acoustic guitar in hand. ‘Might as well fulfill all of the clichés tonight,’ he laughed and started playing a slow melody on the instrument. And he was entirely right. A bonfire on an early autumn night, out in the country. On someone’s birthday. It really couldn’t get any cheesier than that. 

Matty was humming along to whatever Adam was playing and George was tapping some fingers against his lap. 

Sophie closed her eyes. ‘I fear I’m going to make a fool out of myself again but - is that one of your songs or..?’ 

‘I’m starting to feel offended,’ Matty said. He crossed his outstretched legs over his ankles and gently tapped his shoe against her thigh. 

She blushed. ‘I know. Sorry. But I’d feel odd blasting your songs through the house while you’re there, actually.’ 

‘You could always play us a song. I wouldn’t be complaining,’ Gus said. 

This time Matty got up and walked over to the barn to pick up another guitar. He and Adam looked at each other and then started playing. She did recognise the melody for once. 

‘Do you even realise how lucky we are?’ Gus muttered as he moved about and put his head in Sophie’s lap. 

‘I do,’ she replied, watching as George passed Gus the blunt once more. She tipped her head back as Gus exhaled, so she wouldn’t get smoke in her eyes. Sophie rolled her shoulders and took all of the sounds in - the crackling of the fire, the guitar sounds, Matty’s voice, and how George backed him sometimes. An odd sense of fondness settled in her heart - one she hadn’t felt in a long time. 

When she had moved to London all those years ago, she hadn’t known a single person. It had been fate that Bethany had become her roommate and that they got along so well. She fell into that circle of friends and when they all set off for their first festival camping trip, she’d somehow become a part of a group. She’d felt it then, thankful for friendship and happy to be around those people. As it had fallen apart then, and Gus and her had turned their backs on those people, it hadn’t been quite as easy to build up that sort of friendship with anyone again. Gus and her were a single entity now and they did have friends but none she felt quite as close too.   
But just in that moment there, nothing felt out of place. 

She’d feared that things might become awkward once the guys had figured out that Gus’ and her bickering was only mildly entertaining and that the quite frankly different worlds they lived in would alienate them eventually. 

But if anything - everything she’d worried about only served as topics for one conversation after the other. It felt like they’d known each other for a lot longer than a week. 

Adam just let the last note on the guitar ring out when Gus sat up. He reached for Sophie’s bottle of beer and took a large gulp, then another. 

‘Are you okay?’ she asked. 

Gus nodded and scrambled to his feet. ‘I’m just gonna get some -‘ but he swayed a little. ‘I’m gonna get some water.’ 

George cleared his throat and looked at Matty with raised brows. Gus took a couple of steps forward before he started retching. 

‘Sorry?’ George offered. 

Sophie hung her head low and sighed. ‘Right. I’ll be back in a bit. Best get him to bed, yeah? And don’t be sorry. He’s old enough.’ 

Gus stood with his hands on his knees, bent forward. He was retching before he threw up at last, narrowly missing Sophie’s rubber boots. She turned her head away and clasped a hand over her mouth, squinting her eyes at the guys and taking a deep breath.

‘What would you ever do without me..?’ she mumbled as she put a hand on Gus’ back. ‘Come on. Time for bed.’ 

She helped him stand up straight, throwing his left arm over her shoulder, and guided him through the house, up into their room. Before she could help him out of his clothes, Gus was curled up on his side, fast asleep. Sophie went to find a couple of buckets in the laundry room, set one down on the floor beside the bed and made sure he’d find a bottle of water to drink if he ever woke up before morning. 

She then filled up a bucket with water in the kitchen and took it outside, trying to dissolve the vomit on the grass before someone stepped in. 

‘Do you need help with anything else?’ Matty called. She shook her head and waved him off. 

‘I’ll be back in a second.’ 

When she’d put the bucket away, she grabbed another blanket and went back outside. 

‘I’m really sorry, we should have warned him,’ George told her again. 

‘It’s okay. It’s probably a culmination of everything. He went a bit hard on the spirits tonight,’ she said, ‘We don’t really drink that much. Normally. Which is funny telling you that, considering he got hammered the other night as well.’ 

Sophie sat down again and threw the blanket over her lap. The fire was slowly growing smaller, still warming but not as hot as it had been when Gus had lit it up. She ran a tentative finger over the strings of the discarded guitar on her right, right over the sound hole. 

‘The other day, you said you wanted to learn the guitar - why nothing else?’ Adam asked. 

‘It’s seemed to be the easiest…,’ she started, which made the guys laugh. She blushed. The making of music, instruments, reading notes - she was totally out of her depth there. ’I don’t mean easiest to learn, though. We didn’t have the room for a piano and the violin or anything more classical seemed too expensive. An acoustic guitar takes up almost no space and it’s not as loud as the drums. And you can do almost any song on it. I know it’s hard to learn it though.’ 

‘It takes some work, but it’s definitely never too late,’ Adam told her. 

‘I’ve never even held a one properly,’ she laughed uneasily. 

‘Go on,’ Matty said, lifting the guitar by its neck and holding it out for her. Adam adjusted his guitar in his lap. ‘Just watch what Hann does.’ Matty scooted over and kneeled behind her. Adam gave her precise directions and she tired but everyone watching her was making her nervous. 

‘Watch your wrist - ‘ Adam told her, but before she could straighten it, Matty slid his hand around her wrist to steady it. His body pressing up to her back was both - reassuring and unsettling. She could feel his breath on her cheek as he glanced over her shoulder. 

‘And now listen,’ Adam said, strumming across the strings, then repositioning his fingers along the neck. He strummed again. ‘Now I’m going to tell you where you put your fingers. Make sure you put them between the frets and not on them.’ 

Sophie tried, putting the inside of her cheek continuously. ‘Right, you’re telling me I can stretch my finger that far..?’ 

‘It’s just practise,’ Matty said, ‘we’ve just got a few years of training on you.’ His hand moved up from her wrist, covering her fingers with his to keep them in place. 

‘Right, and now - your right hand,’ Adam said. Matty pushed at her elbow a little, so her right hand rested nearer the sound hole. ‘There are different ways to do it, but you could start out with running your thumb down all the strings.’ 

She looked up and at him, raising her eyebrows. 

‘Come on. That one is easy,’ Adam encouraged her. 

She turned her head a little to the side. Matty was still practically draped over her back. His breath was warm on the back of her neck. 

‘What are you waiting for?’ he said softly, giving her right hand a nudge with his own. 

The sound was louder than she expected and she quickly clasped her hand over the strings to mute them. 

‘Well, see. You got that move down,’ Adam laughed, ‘and now - once more. On you own.’ 

She took her hands off the guitar and shook them. ‘That’s really painful.’ 

‘You get used to it,’ Matty said, reaching for her left hand. He pressed his right thumb into her palm and ran the fingers of his right hand along hers, ‘now try again.’ 

Sophie slowly put her hands back onto the instrument, checking with Adam with every step. When she was sure she’d positioned her fingers and hand right, she looked at him for confirmation. 

‘Think about what I said, Sophie,’ he said, ‘are your fingers all in the right place?’ 

She frowned. 

‘One fret over,’ Matty muttered under his breath. She jumped as his breath tickled her neck again but she let her hand glide down the neck of the guitar. 

Adam gave her some more directions which she tried to put to use but she failed. ‘I’m sorry, I’m a klutz.’ 

‘A loveable one though,’ Adam replied, ‘Do you want to repeat that tomorrow?’ 

She nodded. ‘I’d love to.’ 

Matty took the guitar off her and put it beside him. Sophie smiled as he stayed put behind her. She leaned back, just a bit, enough for her back to press into his chest. He tugged on the corner of the blanket in her lap. 

‘It’s a bit chilly now, isn’t it?’ Matty started moving behind her. Suddenly, she was sitting between his legs. He threw the blanket over his shoulders and wrapped the ends around her. His chest pressed up against her back again. She did like the feeling of it, she did not like how Adam and Ross exchanged knowing looks though. 

‘What are you doing?’ she wondered, although it was obvious what was happening. George took a sip from his bottle of beer, shaking his head. He smiled and winked at her. She remembered the conversation they had had earlier in the day. 

Matty didn’t say a word. He just lit up a cigarette, before his left hand came to rest on her thigh under the blanket. The muscles in her leg tensed. She liked the feel of his hand, but it put a lot of vivid images in her mind. She needed to distract herself.

‘So, day two up by the sea. Do you regret coming here yet?’ She asked, but directed the question at no one in particular. 

‘No regrets,’ Ross said, ‘not regretting anything at all, really.’ 

‘Anything we did led us to this point in life,’ George said. 

‘You?’ Matty asked her. His chin was now hooked over her right shoulder. Obviously, they had had their intimate moments but being this close around other people was new. 

‘Would I change anything about my life? No. Definitely not. Do I have regrets? One or two, maybe. They have mostly to do with trusting the wrong people.’ 

‘You mean those friends you had?’ Adam asked. 

‘Beth and Alex? Ah, there were others. The four of us had an amazing time. And Alex and Gus are friends again,’ she said, not letting on whether she was keen on that or not. ‘And to be honest, Beth did me a real favour. Alex was a lot of things, but definitely not someone I’d have put up with for so long under different circumstances. We went to visit my parents one weekend and he was fine with them but when we went out with my childhood friends - they despised him. It should have been a warning.’

‘So, why did you put up with him for so long?’ George asked. ‘You don’t seem like someone who surrounds herself with people she can’t actually stand.’ 

She laughed. It was an easy enough answer. He was around, he was very keen on sex and he was good at it too, probably the best she ever had. 

‘Ah, what the hell,’ she muttered, ‘The same reason Beth and him ended up going behind our backs? Because he was excellent in bed. And it was convenient to have him around.’ Sophie covered her eyes with one hand. ‘I can’t believe I just said that.’ 

Sophie was glad that they actually laughed at that. 

She pulled up one leg and let her knee rest against Matty’s thigh. His hand didn’t budge though. 

‘Well, that’s honest,’ Adam said, picking at the label on the bottle of his beer. 

Sophie grinned. ‘There really was no other reason.’ 

‘Why are Gus and Alex friends then?’ Matty asked, ‘That Alex character seems to be a real moron and Gus strikes me as quite the opposite.’ 

‘Because they’d been friends forever? Because of all the childhood memories? I think the only reason why Gus didn’t end up being like the rest of his family is because he spent so much time at Alex’’, she said, ‘It’s fine by me. He does hang out at our flat. The three of us can sit at a table and eat, without tearing each other’s heads off.’ 

‘You’re a saint,’ Ross said.

She shook her head. ‘I’m really not. I genuinely don’t care about him anymore. He did send me a message today though. So, that was… sort of nice.’ 

Eventually, Adam got up and excused himself. He’d promised to call his girlfriend and decided to call it a night. And that broke the bonfire mood. Ross announced he was going to take a shower. Matty sighed. 

‘What about you?’ His hand squeezed her thigh a little. 

Sophie shrugged. ‘I should probably go and check on Gus in a bit. I think I’m going to crash on the sofa anyway. Not particularly a fan of waking up to him puking his guts out in a bucket. And I’m not tired yet. A thirty minute daytime nap makes up for two hours of night sleep.’ 

‘And you’ve had an hour,’ Matty observed. ‘Want to use some of that energy and watch a film? What about you, George? You up for it?’

**

Sophie woke up confused. Not remembering where and when she fell asleep apparently became a theme.

She wasn’t in her bed because it was too light in the room and her back was pressed against something. She blinked a couple of times, so her eyes would adjust to the darkness. 

It slowly came back to her: Matty and George bickering about which film to watch and finally settling for something. How she’d pulled out the sofa bed and made herself comfortable - and then it had become difficult to keep her eyes open. Her back was pressed against the side of the sofa and Matty was right there, next to her on his back. On his other side, George was curled up under a blanket, facing away from them. 

She wondered if she should wake them up and send them to the comforts of the bed in their room. She lifted her head and squinted at Matty’s face. His eyes were open. 

Sophie gasped, then clutched a hand to her mouth. 

‘Didn’t mean to startle you,’ Matty whispered barely loud enough for her to hear. 

‘What time is it?’ she wondered. Matty fumbled around somewhere above their heads with his free hand. 

‘Just gone three.’ He checked on his phone, then tossed it back into the dark. 

Sophie rubbed at her eyes. She’d fallen asleep in her make up and it was now probably smudged all over her face. ‘Did you sleep at all?’ 

‘No. Sleeping is one thing I’m not good at.’ He sounded annoyed, but extended his arm, so she could rest her head on his chest. Sophie hesitated briefly. Considering how intimate they already had been, cozying up shouldn’t seem like a big deal. But this was a closeness of a different kind. 

She still froze for a second when she realised that he’d stripped off his t-shirt at one point. Keeping herself from nuzzling Matty’s warm skin was a challenge. Sophie was unsure what to do with her hand. It hovered over Matty’s chest before he clasped it in his and pulled it up to his mouth. He kissed the inside of her wrist, then pressed the palm of her hand against his cheek. 

‘Are you okay?’ She muttered, concerned. He seemed a little off. 

She could feel him nod. ‘Just a little exhausted.’ Sophie knew that was merely symptom and not the root of what was wrong. She didn’t push it though. George was still asleep next to them and she didn’t want to rouse him with their talking. Softly, she let her thumb rub over Matty’s cheek. There was the faintest trace of a stubble. 

George shifted in his sleep, he might have mumbled even something under his breath. 

As the house fell silent again, Sophie concentrated on the steady rise and fall of Matty’s chest. It was hard to tell if he had fallen asleep at last. She fought her own tiredness for a little while longer, but her body betrayed her, finally relaxing into Matty everywhere that they were touching. Sleep overcame her once again.


End file.
